Here are the top ten things that fundamentalists apparently expect people to say even if somehow they almost never do.
10. I’m so happy that you’re here knocking on my door on Saturday morning. Please, come in and judge me for a while!
9. Waiting to kiss my spouse until we were married has made it so much more enjoyable!
8. Your culottes are so modest that they make me feel like I’m dressed like a hussy! Can I get your sewing pattern for them?
7. The Bible makes so much more sense to me since I threw away my NIV and started reading the King James.
6. Since coming to your church I realized what was missing in my spiritual life: more pastoral screaming.
5. Looking at your family makes me so sad that I too selfish to have six more children.
4. I get to go to heaven AND vote for Republican Presidential candidates? What a sweet deal!
3. I’d so much rather have this Gospel tract than food or money.
2. Yes! I had always suspected something sinister about The Smurfs!
1. Since joining your church I finally understand what Jesus meant about His yoke being easy and his burden being light.
Now that I’ve read some of the ‘stuff” on your site, what do i do with
my newfound fundie friends. Should I drop them and ask you to e-mail
me a list of approved Christian friends that measure up with YOUR
criteria? Your problem is that you don’t paint with a broad enough
brush. The Grahams, (Yeah you know, Billy, Franklin and Ned) have long
been giving aid and comfort to the same Chinese church apparatus that
has been killing and persecuting our brethren for years. No complaints
on this site about that. I could site the likes of Rick Warren, Bill
Hybels, Josh McDowell and others who with their rhetoric have
supported the arrest of brethren for witnessing to Muslims in
Dearborn, Michigan and persecution and imprisonment of brethren for
“proselytizing” in other nations. Why are there no posts here about
that. Answer. Because to do so is to use too broad a brush. I’m
surprised you guys weren’t high-fiving one another over the deaths of
these missionaries in Mexico. Weren’t THEY fundies? With all due
candor, I cannot call myself a fundie, not in the purest sense anyway.
But people like you (yourselves, whatever) will make a fundie out of
me. There are plenty of planks to be pulled out of eyes. Start with
your own. Of course it could be that I’m not even dealing with true
Christians here. I don’t know who I’m dealing with here at vthis site.
Maybe this comment was just a complete waste of time.
(Signed)None of your business
You know, I really feel for this individual. It must be such a bummer to go to a site about fundamentalists and then discover that they only talk about fundamentalists instead of whatever your own pet topics are.
Update 1: A couple of people seem very concerned with pointing out that Jeff Fugate himself allegedly had nothing to do with this sign being put up and ordered it taken down once he discovered it. In reality, it doesn’t much matter to me who was the actual person placing the letters on the sign because it shows a mindset that is pervasive and promoted through fundamentalism. I applaud whoever it was that finally had the honesty to make a public spectacle of their hatred of their fellow man instead of keeping it inside the church walls where it usually resides.
A silly blog dedicated to Independent Fundamental Baptists, their standards, their beliefs, and their craziness.
