Category Archives: Standards

Providing Independent Baptist Alternatives to Internet Phenomena

nosocialnetworkingThe great thing about the Internet is that it brings a great diverse group of people together to collaborate, talk, and share information. Unless, of course, you’re a fundamentalist. They don’t generally like having to interact with diversity preferring rather to create their own enclaves of Christianity.

With the growing popularity of social networking sites such as Facebook and MySpace, it was only a matter of time until an enterprising fundy decided to provide a much cleaner, more wholesome alternative — and try to make a little cash in the process. By this shall all men know that ye are His disciples, that ye form your own exclusive clubs and keep the sinners at bay.

Newly on the scene to stand in this internet gap is Edify One Another an IFB social networking site which states “As Independent Baptists, God has burdened us to create a place online that was separated from the world, but utilize the cutting edge technological advances to promote spiritual growth thru the fellowship of the saints online.” Finally an answer to the question “What Would Hyles Download?”

The best part? You can access to all of this for only $9.97 per month!

Online separation: only the holy may click here.

Burial

casketNot only do fundamentalists have strict standards for a person’s body while they are alive, they also have a rather strict view of what should happen after they die as well. Mention cremation to some fundamentalists and one might very well receive the kind of reaction that would normally only be observed after suggestions for something like ritual cannibalism.

It would seem that early Christians buried their dead rather than immolating them. Whether this was because they disliked the Greek and Roman customs or because they were living in catacombs anyway making burial there a lot more convenient is unclear. Of course if the “paganism” of a practice is the main concern then embalming should definitely be forbidden lest they they be like unto the heathen Egyptians. (ed. the previous is satire and should not be taken seriously no matter how strict a fundamentalist you are. If I hear of someone preaching against embalming based on the its history in Egypt, I will devote an entire post to your silliness. You have been warned.)

Man came from dust and to dust he shall return. Apparently it’s the speed at which he gets there that has fundamentalists in such a tizzy.

Occassionally Chuckling At Themselves

bus2

My hat is off to the good folks at Maranatha Baptist Bible College who evidently have the gift of being able to poke a little fun at themselves.

Check out their listing for a Masters In Bus Ministry with courses like:

BM 103: The Bus Ministry and Homeland Security
BM 210: Corn Crossbreeding and Home Ethanol Distillation
BM 302: Negotiation Skills and Pre-Adolescent Biting
BM 305: Petroleum Industry Futures Trading
BM 306: Long Bus Routes and The Exodus: Reformed Theology Examined
BM 409: Assigned Seats?: Calvinistic Thought and the Bus Ministry

(thanks to melissa for the link)