Category Archives: education

education

Trying Social Media (And Failing So Bad That It’s Strangely Good)

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To the amazement of alumni everywhere (and after spending years slamming blogs and forums that dared to disagree with it), Pensacola Christian College has caught the spirit of social media and has launched its own blog full of articles purportedly written by students and faculty. Since it has taken them only until 2011 to catch up to blogging, one can easily imagine that PCC will be getting a Twitter account about the time Haley’s Comet returns. I can’t wait.

However, my hopes that maybe this was a move to let real students say actually true things about their experiences at PCC were doomed from the outset. Evidently, everyone at that college uses the exact same writing style and sentence structure as dictated from Dr. Chapman’s little blue book to sing the praises of everything and everyone at Pensacola Christian. Also, the writers are apparently all named “Maribeth” and work for minimum wage in the college promotions department. Or at least that’s what I’m left to believe after reading some of these gems.

“Troy” writes:

I never actually attended “college days”, but I did take a trip with my senior year of high school to see what the college was like. It was a wonderful opportunity to really see what PCC was all about. It wasn’t until this trip that I realized God wanted me here.

Call me cynical but I’m guessing that God may also have opened his eyes to the fact that there’s a honking big water park on campus.

On another piece about Dr. Clyde Box, (cleverly named “Outside the Box”) a girl named Debi comments:

That was a really good message! Afterward, I got Dr. Box to sign my Bible, and that made my night! Especially after that message!

Well, sister, if that’s not a squeeeee! inducing moment, then I don’t know what is.

But as good as the comments are, they can’t beat the articles wherein “Megan,“ allegedly an actual student, writes the following (supposedly with a straight face):

Bible Conference week is a time set aside for rest, the beach, relaxation, research papers, sleep, and, most importantly, good preaching.

I was at PCC for four years. I can’t imagine an actual breathing student writing that and really meaning it. Bible conference was a time for wearing a suit 10 hours a day and listening to 9,876 sermons on fleeing youthful lust. Nobody ever, ever, ever in my hearing referred to it as “relaxing.” You would likely have been beaten with a wide-margin KJV if you had dared.

As if this love fest of all things PCC-related wasn’t enough, there are even helpful enrollment advisers who troll monitor the site with spam helpful answers.

Don’t bother trying to add your own comments, however. They won’t be approved. Only the beautiful and certifiably fundy are allowed to be heard on this bastion of blessed blogging.

Watching PCC discover social media is somewhat like watching the Clampetts discover indoor plumbing. They just don’t quite get it. When you take a medium that’s best used for discussions and open dialog and then censor it, polish it, and turn it into advertising, unintentional hilarity is bound to ensue.

education

Yet Another Student Handbook That Would Make Draco Jealous

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From the Handbook of Calvary Christian School, a “ministry” of Calvary Baptist Church of King, NC. One can only assume that none of these children have parents.

Any student who decides to operate a personal online website or contributes to a blog must register the website/blog with the school office. (Ex: facebook, blogger.com, YouTube, etc.) The website must be registered immediately upon its creation.

Any student who creates a website or blog prior to attending Calvary Christian School must register the website/blog before final acceptance is granted. All websites/blogs will be monitored for content on a regular basis. Any student found with an unregistered website or blog, or website or blog material that is deemed inappropriate to the purpose and mission of Calvary Baptist Church and Calvary Christian School will be in direct disobedience to this ruling. This will result in disciplinary action as detailed below, and repeat offenses can lead to dismissal from Calvary Christian School.

1st offense: 25 demerits + 1 detention
2nd offense: 1-day out-of-school suspension
3+ offense: Case-by-case administrative ruling

“Inappropriate material” posted on any publicly accessible location (website, blog, YouTube, etc.) includes, but is not limited to,

1) any words, phrases, communications, pictures or images deemed by the pastor or principal to be inappropriate,

2) any text naming or referring to Calvary Baptist Church or Christian School, its personnel or students,

3) any images of CCS students, faculty, or facilities without the
express consent of every person in the image, the parents of students shown, and the school administration.

NOTE regarding Myspace: Because of the uncontrollable nature of
Myspace, the regular ungodly advertising banners, the easy links to ungodly material, etc, Myspace is completely off limits. Anyone who has already opened a Myspace account must cease from using it, and must register it as described above (because it cannot be deleted).

See also: Controlling The Flow Of Information.

Current Events, education

Silent Change Redux

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Almost a year ago, I did a post about the tendency of fundamentalists to shift their stances on issues while all the while pretending that nothing has changed at all. Nothing to see here, folks! We’ve always believed this way.

This sort of selective memory was clearly exemplified by the announcement a week ago that after thirty-five years of a principled stand against accreditation, Pensacola Christian College has suddenly decided that maybe it isn’t so bad an idea after all. Hey, all that stuff we told you about being forced to teach evolution and endorse communism and having to give up our high standards of Christian excellence? Forget all that. We never said it. It never happened. We’ve always planned on seeking accreditation someday…it just took us a few decades to get around to it.

So for all of you PCC grads who suffered for Jesus by being unable to get certain jobs, get into schools, or follow certain career paths because your alma mater was standing on its convictions: the joke, it would seem, is on you. They hope you’ve enjoyed your substandard employment and educational opportunities. Now they’re going to change their minds.

Yes, I know we’re going to have a long conversation about how the accreditation is national not regional and it won’t throw open the doors to PCC alums to do everything that graduates of other schools can do. However, the main point still remains. PCC has changed what they had previously called a principled stand without even paying lip service to the countless students who have paid the price for getting an unaccredited degree over the years. We can expect all the anti-accreditation rhetoric to be flushed down the memory hole and completely forgotten by the same people who so strongly defended it in the past.

We’ve always been at war with Eastasia.