This is Gerald
This is Gerald’s Church
This is Gerald’s self-published book that Gerald’s church printed
This is some of the stuff that Gerald’s book says.
Category Archives: Books
Famous Fundy Novels
photo by Stewart Butterfield
Call me…Pastor. (Moby-Dick)
It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a preacher boy in possession of a bible school diploma, must be in want of a wife. (Pride and Prejudice)
It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. (no change required to 1984)
Whether I shall turn out to be the hero of my own life is a foregone conclusion. I’m an evangelist, how could I not be? (David Copperfield)
It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents, except at occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling along the house-tops, and fiercely agitating the scanty flame of the lamps that struggled against the darkness. We went soulwinning anyway. (Paul Clifford)
The sky above the port was the color of television, tuned to a dead channel, the only real channel that any good Christian should be watching given the filth on television these days. (Neuromancer)
I am a sick man . . . I am a spiteful man . . .(no change required to Notes from Underground)
It was like so, but wasn’t. At least that’s what the pastor kept insisting. (Galatea 2.2)
All this happened to the evangelist, more or less. (Slaughterhouse-Five)
Elmer Gantry was drunk. (no change needed to Elmer Gantry)
It was a pleasure to burn Vatican Corrupted Bibles. (Fahrenheit 451)
Miss Brooke had that kind of beauty which seems to be thrown into relief by frumpy jean jumpers. (Middlemarch)
Once upon a time, there was a woman who discovered she had turned into the wrong person. (No change needed to Back When We Were Grownups)
He was an inch, perhaps two, under six feet, powerfully built, and he advanced straight at you with a slight stoop of the shoulders, head forward, and a fixed from-under stare which made you think of a charging bull. Then he’d introduce himself as Doctor Pastor Brother Hyles. (Lord Jim)
Justice?—You get justice in the next world, in this world you have the law. (no change needed to A Frolic of His Own)
They say when trouble comes close ranks, and so the fundamentalist people did. (Wide Sargasso Sea)
Do you have any to add? Let’s hear them!
Trial By Fire (Bob Gray cries “Persecution!”)
Bob Gray (Texas) has a new book out exploring the trials and tribulations endured by Independent Baptists. Oh, how they suffer.
Topics covered include: “Satan’s Attack on Pastoral Authority”, “Satan’s Attack Using Calvinism”, and and that ever present question: “Why Do Adult Children Rebel?” To that last perhaps not thinking of them as “adult children” and just calling them “adults” might be helpful.
Disappointingly, the only way to get your hands on this literary masterpiece right now is to direct order it from Bob himself. However, Christmas is coming up and I’m hopeful that one of these may find its way into my fireplace stocking. I can’t wait to see if there are any veiled references to SFL in its pages.
Hubris
Well, I know what all of Hamblin’s friends and acquaintances are getting for Christmas this year…
Book Review (With Extra Commentary on a Variety of Things
Here a man gives a vigorous and detailed review of a book that changed his life: The Full Cup, the autobiography of Peter Ruckman. On a side note, I don’t know who designed the cover but it’s about as creepy as I would expect a book by Ruckman to be.
I was interested by the reviewer’s claim that the King James Bible is the “#1 book on Planet Earth.” I wonder if he knows that the majority of people on the planet don’t speak English.