Ronda Rousey can do the job of punching this guy’s lights out.
Only takes a few seconds for her.
I don’t see the problem with what this guy is saying. Of course his wife should be at home taking care of him; every adult with severe developmental problems needs their own carer.
Third
I walked out on a sermon like this once, after I had started thinking for myself. Took my kids with me and explained to them why we left. Felt pretty good!
Good for you! And good example for your kids, not allowing yourself to be bullied
Good for you! And yes, way to set a good example for your kids.
I’ve heard Ephesians 5:22 misquoted and taken out of context so much. It’s a fave of imbeciles.
Because they like to stop at verse 23.. and forget about verses 28-33…because that looks much more like an equal partnership, and not a
“In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 o“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband…”
A man who loves his wife as he loves himself isn’t expecting a servant to wait on him.
“A man who loves his wife as he loves himself isn’t expecting a servant to wait on him.”
This!
Is that the verse that goes “Slaves, obey your husbands”?
I’d like to beat him about the head with the word impeccable. It’s so horrid I can’t decide if I should laugh or cry. It’s funny until you realize that many women and men in his church will actually believe this and do crazy things to try to attain it. I will never understand these guys who think they are entitled to full time maid service, and wonder if they ever fully understand the endless aggravation some women go through trying to live up to their ridiculous standard of perfection. Or the families who feel needless guilt because a woman has to find “secular” work to pay bills, or even the unthinkable – that a woman might even *enjoy* her secular job. None of this is actually in the bible, there’s not a single verse about looking like a million bucks with a perfect house and perfect kids when the hubs waltzes in the door. Yet it’s preached as if it is.
It also fails to address the things that matter- like contentment. As usual, fundies focused on external appearances.
I have an old, sacred book that recommends exactly what Mr. Man up there is on about. It was passed down in my family as a precious relic. Women dress up beautifully even as they prepare dinner, they meet their hubbies at the door with a nice drink, the kids are well-scrubbed and respectful and never not smiling, and in return the husband dashes into the house as fast as he can after parking the large car that he has rightfully earned. And, of course, non-WASP people are picturesquely ethnic when they exist at all.
It’s the 1954 (I think; the cover fell off) edition of the Betty Crocker Cookbook.
What is not mentioned is that a great deal of this nonsense was a primitive attempt to deal with (undiagnosed) PTSD. Because if everything is not perfect, your dear hubby might might beat the holy hell out of pretty much everything.
Good point. PTSD as a major influence in the 1950s is not talked about much. But for a generation that grew up in the trauma of the Great Depression, and then had a large percentage of its men in World War II and the Korean War, (plus the ever-present specter of nuclear war), PTSD was surely a huge factor.
You’re right. The guys were all shell-shocked from WWII and resentful of the gals having gotten a taste of independence when they went to the munitions and aircraft factories so we could win the war. Then the war was over, there were few if any jobs for soldiers coming home. There was a backlash at the women and a crusade to put them “back in their place”. That’s why I hate movies from the 1950’s. The women are portrayed as bimbos and their characters’ speech patterns and accent are decidedly changed and there begins to be an inordinate emphasis on a woman’s figure and measurements. I grew up observing this and even as a kid it made me angry. Add to that recipe the precepts of fundy-ism and you’ve got a real potion already.
You know, it’s funny that you bring this up. I heard Mrs MOG say that the “Greatest Generation” didn’t have the PTSD that the latest combat vets did. They just sucked it up and drove on. The implication was that this generation of vets was weak and spineless.
She spoke only as a fundy civilian could speak. Her husband never served and neither have her kids.
You never come home from combat unscathed. Some have it worse than others, but there is always a price that is paid by the service member. Not to mention the families. Even if you’ve never personally had to fire in anger, you still have Katushas and other nasty things directed at you. Maybe you even watch your buddies die.
Every fundy who says PTSD isn’t real needs to serve a tour in combat. That can be either in the military, a contractor, or with an NGO.
They knew about the post-war adjustments back in the 1940s. Check out the film, “The Best Years of Our Lives” from 1946. It deals with PTSD, unemployment, alcoholism, and a host of other issues that returning vets faced. It also won eight Oscars, including Best Picture.
People who think that PTSD is something new, or that it started with Vietnam vets, have no historical knowledge.
Read accounts of “shell shocked” World War I veterans (Hemingway’s short stories, for example), or look at the documentary films of World War II veterans in treatment for “combat fatigue,” or look up all the insanity that swept the country following the Civil War. Being in a war causes permanent injuries. As with other wounds, some people manage to adapt and live fairly normal lives, while others can’t.
Dad flew 29 missions over Germany as a nose-gunner/bombadier in a B-17. He rarely spoke of the war.
In the weeks before he passed, he spent a great deal of time “reading” a book on his bomb group, the “Bloody 100th”. His mind had forsaken him. Just the day before entering hospice, aged 89, he raved on and on about Hitler.
His PTSD was evident throughout his life (clearly in retrospect).
Linn, I am very familiar with “The Best Years of Our Lives”. It is one of my favorite movies. It is a great treatment of many of the issues that combat vets face.
I completely agree that to disavow PTSD is to ignore history and post-war artistic endeavors. There is plenty of written history and living anecdotes, not to mention songs, literary works, and cinematic productions detailing the hell of war and the permanent wounds on the combatants’ psyches.
Bald Jones grad:
The Bloody 100th.
B-17 group that took some of the heaviest losses of any bomber group in the war.
A Group was 18-36 aircraft in strength. Out of those 18 to 36, the 100th lost 177 aircraft over the course of the war, often a dozen of them on a single mission — Regensburg, Berlin, Muenster…
Muenster. Don’t know if the Bloody 100th took off at full strength (lets say 18 aircraft), but only one of them — “Rosie’s Riveters” — came back from Muenster.
I heard Creflo Dollar, of the WOF camp, rant about wanting the house spotless when he came home and he’d better see the lines on the carpet left by the vacuum cleaner and nobody had better walk across it until he’s had time to sit on the couch and enjoy looking at it. Right out loud on TV like he didn’t have sense enough to know how absurd and control freaky that is.
Dear SFL Reader:
A woman’s place is in the house.
Also the senate.
Christian Socialist
+10
Don’t forget the White House, the Kremlin, 10 Downing Street, board rooms, or anywhere else she wants and is capable of being.
…..and in the mall.
“… with a hostile environment, this… anti-everything”
Hahahahaha! That’s rich.
May this hostile environment progress a little closer to everyone being anti-ignorance, anti-hatred, anti-bigotry, -chauvinism, -thought control, -unwarranted power and everything else that gives these blockheads a boner.
Hear hear!
Dear leo the lamb:
What a wonderful political benediction for all reactionary fundamentalists — not that there are fundamentalists who are not reactionary…
Christian Socialist
This guy has obviously never spent a day at home with children…who can destroy any carefully arranged home in nanoseconds. Nor does he have any insight as to how 21st century families usually need two salaries to make ends meet.
I was in an evangelical church in the Bay Area here in California 20 years ago. We had a guest speaker who went on and on about how women should not work outside the home, to a congregation where every woman under the age of 65 worked, and we had office managers, physicians, teachers, lawyers, etc. who were all female. He was never asked back.
This.
Don’t forget: this is the subculture that treats keeping children under control that is seen only in boot camps and prisons as fundamental to Christian character.
Nor does he have any insight as to how 21st century families usually need two salaries to make ends meet.
Of course not. When the MoG’s money gets tight, just preach TITHE! TITHE! TITHE! TITHE! TITHE!
I just learned that my wife needs a superviser when she is at home. Do I need to hire one of those too? har har har
The supervisor is “over top of her” if I recall the preecher saying.
Hmmm…
Top & Bottom, Dom & Sub, Penetrator & Penetrated.
Him and his slave have one son, and three grandkids. Does that mean the son isn’t married?
The helpmeets are implied
Also this implies that anything going wrong in the marriage is the wife’s fault
That message is pretty much why Anna is still a Duggar.
Ouch. Sad but poignant observation.
That is EXACTLY what I said to my husband!!
“Some of the best marriage advice you’ll ever get?” I’d like to give him some marriage advice, with a crow bar, or a pair of scissors. What a jackass.
If you’re tired of living, Buddy, just try giving my wife this “marriage advice.”
You must have one of the good ones, Big Gary.
Yes, I do!
You must BE one of the good ones, BG.
Tired of living and scared of dying?
Well, Old Man River, he just keeps rolling along.
Sorry, could not resist. I’m kinda like you, BG: Everything reminds me of a song.
Once again, this song comes to mind…with a slight modification. I know, it’s a frail attempt! Seriously, though, with every post I have to shake my head as Sonny and Cher perform in the echos of my mind:
The beat goes on, beat goes on
Fundies keep pounding a rhythm to the brain
La de da de de, la de da de da
Hyles was once the rage, uh huh
History has turned the page, uh huh
The jean skirt’s the current thing, uh huh
King Jimmie is our newborn king, uh huh
And the beat goes on, beat goes on
Fundies keep pounding a rhythm to the brain
La de da de de, la de da de da
Ashley Madison on the internet, uh huh
Little girls still breaks the MOG’s heart, uh huh
And men still keep their wimmens close to home,
Electronically they keep track on how their church has grown.
And the beat goes on, the beat goes on
Fundies keep pounding a rhythm to the brain
La de da de de, la de da de da
The MOG sits on his throne to reminisce
While not chasing girls to get a kiss
Fundy U keeps losing students all the time
MOG still cries, “Hey buddy, did you forget to tithe?”
And the beat goes on, the beat goes on
Fundies keep pounding a rhythm to the brain
La de da de de, la de da de da
And the beat goes on, yes, the beat goes on
And the beat goes on, and the beat goes on
The beat goes on and the beat goes on
The beat goes
B.R.1
Remember, the unsyncopated, 4/4 timing beat.
Good one, Big Red!
Huh. It reminded me of Ozzie. Crazy Train.
If this is the best marriage advice he can give a person, there isn’t anyone that should be taking marital advice from him. If he’s ever met a woman, she wasn’t wiling or able to speak to him as an equal.
*twitch* I can’t even watch this. So glad my kids won’t get this kind of message. It’s so damaging!
The bitch of it is that this sort of message can only do damage if a woman has been brainwashed since childhood, generally speaking.
That’s true. An adult woman who hasn’t been preconditioned to accept this kind of talk is more likely to just stare in disbelief at this weird Martian in front of her.
Another reason that the IFB is slowly dying out. It’s being replaced by the evangelical hipster boy preachers (think Elevation Church in NC).
Many of this new breed is equally misogynistic. We will continue to see fewer and fewer young people self-identify as Christians.
I’m not seeing what you’re seeing BJg. Sure there is misogyny represented in every group, some more than others, but the hip evangelical churches are far more likely to be progressive, especially compared to the fundies. There are evangelical churches all over the US that value gender equality. Christianity as we know it is going no where. Fundamentalist Christianity is dying a slow and painful death.
the Admiral
If Fundies continue to train their men to treat women like this, Fundy colleges and churches will start to resemble Ashley Madison —
Just a bunch of loser guys talking to themselves.
I forget who first said this, but “On the Internet, men are men, and the women are also men, and the children are undercover cops.”
It’s hard to listen to a guy talk about how not to be a poser, when he is dressed like a 200% poser.
barf….this is equally as annoying as the other video… a combined total of five life giving minutes I can never get back
Token, I thought that at first, but there are a lot of small airports that one can just walk onto. I worked at an airport with similar hangars many years ago that anyone could walk onto. There was no security at all. Some share the property with other businesses. Our local airport is easily accessible from many points.
Having spent most of my career at major airports, it always looks strange to me to see someone just walking along.
My bigger worry is that this guy might be as big an idiot as his clothing ensemble leads me to think he is, and that he shouldn’t be allowed out without adult supervision.
I hit the wrong reply. Pretend this is in answer to TokenCatholic and not CullottesWithPleats, please.
I guess today, I’m the idiot.
I haven’t tried it, but I imagine I could walk onto the runway at my local airport. There isn’t a ton of security.
But I would be afraid I’d get run over by a plane.
BG, if it is a controlled field (with a control tower), the fear should be the possibility of the $10,000 fine for the unauthorized incursion. I haven’t been the recipient of one, but rumor is the feds like the ability to separate folks from their cash just fine.
as an aviation professional, i wonder why is he allowed to walk around on the ramp, unescorted, without any kind of badge
Yup, it is just taking on a different appearance. There is a group like that in my home town, They dress all modern but modest and the guys all sport the same haircut (literally). I’ve seem some of their members out at restaurants. The adult guys do all the talking and the wives and kids sit there like zombies eating their food and not making eye contact with anyone but dear old dad who stares them down at every turn. I’m not kidding, it’s downright creepy.
I was replying to the subject about some evangelical groups.
1 John 4:9.. because that God sent his only begotten Son into the world, that we might keep the house impeccable and look like a million bucks.
Watched it twice. Missed the “best marriage advice you’ll ever get” part… ?
He says it at the 0:52 time marker.
Please note that HE called it good marriage advice. I didn’t.
Right after he tells the women to meet their husbands at the door looking like a million bucks and kisses his fingertips. “Some of the best marriage advice you ever got” he says. Thanks, Sarah, thanks a lot. Lol. You made me listen to it again too. Are you sure you aren’t a Fundy who knows me and is trying desperately to turn me into a Stepford wife?
Wives should always be lovers too,
Run to his arms the moment he comes home to you,
He’s almost there…..
Great. Now I’ll have that crappy song stuck in my head all night. And so will you. Sorry!!!
Well, hey, it could have been “Stand by Your Man.” But at least that had a tune. A pretty awesome tune at that.
LOL, my mom used to sing that one while she was working around the house. An older version, though.
As a kid, I learned all the old Gershwin/Kern/Porter/Berlin/et al. standards by listening to my mom singing while she puttered around the house.
Catholic GC, I didn’t know there were earlier versions until I read your comment. Thanks to you and Professor Google, I now know that the song was first recorded by Ray Noble and His Orchestra in December 1932 (Otis Redding recorded his hit in 1966). The Noble Orchestra version comes across as a charming Jazz Age artifact. The vintage of the song makes it easier to excuse the rather sexist premise of the lyrics.
You may never see this, but I’m having trouble posting. I couldn’t sign onto the ‘forums’ section without entering the pictorial verification code, and I’ve tried repeatedly to make a post since the morning post. I tried to post an moderately humorous reply to the video in the form of a bulletin board list from this guy’s wife but it did not display. Later, I created a second [similar] list but it did not display either. I reentered that same text [wrote it on notepad], and was told I couldn’t post that since it duplicated a previous post — except that the previous post didn’t show either. Am I the only one having trouble with this?
Christian Socialist
I’ll check on that for you…
Dear Darrell:
Well FINALLY … it went.
Anyway, thanks for the post…
Blessings!
Christian Socialist
You ran afoul of the spam filter for some reason.
Your comment should now be showing.
Dear Pastor:
Remember me? I’m your wife. In the interest of encouraging you to be a good manager, I’m posting on the church bulletin board this list of things I asked you to do this spring.
Fix the garage door
Clean gutters on house and garage
Replace broken light fixture
Caulk the shower
Repair the broken chair
Cap the chimney
Sort your soldier of fortune magazine archive, dispose issues you don’t want
Take the patio stones you promised Ol’ Al
Fix the table leg
Inflate camper tires and install
Take me out for my birthday last May
Give me sex the way I want it instead of taking it as YOUwant
THIS ISN’T NAGGING … THIS IS GOOD MANAGEMENT
Christian Socialist
PS: I’m not bitter…
My house might not be impeccable
But as a housewife I don’t just do housework. I also manage the bills/finances; do the yardwork; take out the trash; homeschool; change the oil; coupon; shop for and cook most meals, sew clothing and things for the home; and deal with workmen when needed, which isn’t often because I do minor home (electrical, plumbing, etc.), appliance, and auto repairs. I don’t think that the Proverbs 31 lady just stayed home and spent all day dusting, either. It doesn’t say that her house was tidy, but it does say she was successful at small scale agriculture, business negotiations, and real estate.
But since this doesn’t fit in the fundyland dream ideal of 1950’s suburban sitcom stereotypes, the Proverbs 31 woman would rub them the wrong way.
Fundies twist the Prov. 31 woman into an exclusively stay-at-home-mom.
Not to mention that the “maidens” she “provides tasks for” (RSV) are her servants. The Proverbs 31 woman didn’t scrub floors and wash grundies. She had people for that.
I have binders full of maidens…
+10, Mitt, er, Dr. Fundystan.
Christian Socialist: for the love of all the kittens in the world, don’t give them womenfolk a new way to justify nagging 😉 I can hear it now, I’m not nagging you, I’m managing!
My wife stays at home and homeschools the three young kids and takes care of a baby as well. How dare I come home from my job of updating a few spreadsheets, answering a few emails, and conversing with adults about the Astros or Texans and expect her to cater to my needs. When I get home, it’s time for me to give her a break and start actually working. Her job is the tough one, mine is the one that gets a paycheck.
I am the leader in the home, but that means when I’m doing it right, I am the lead servant. Kind of like that guy that once washed a few feet.
Interesting. Never thought of it that way before.
Yikes. I want your job. I wrestle with the deadlines from Hell every single day. I must not be living right!
Accounting + Excel = easy job
Excel is my nemesis! Excel is the Anti-Christ!
(Can you tell I was born without a left brain? Your job would not be easy for me, I guarantee. LOL.)
I’m in advertising. And no, it’s not anything like Mad Men anymore. Martini lunches? I wish.
What freakin’ planet does this nut case live on?
Even Ward Cleaver is less crazy sexist than this.
I kept waiting for him to say, “Just kidding!” Is this Leave It to Beaver? Teaching like this is why I still feel guilty if I as a SAHM don’t keep the house clean, even though I have a husband who doesn’t expect or demand it. (In fact, he routinely tells me to leave the mess for him to clean when he gets home.) But it’s hard to shake teaching like this when you were raised in it.
Well, no, because Leave it to Beaver didn’t dress up their social standards in “God said so”. And there is a reason we moved on as a culture – it didn’t work. In fact, a reasonably educated Biblical scholar would tell you that it is entirely contrary to God’s created order. But you don’t have to get theological to recognize hogwash as hogwash.
You better submit and let him honor you.
You better submit and let him honor you.
With open hand, back of hand, or fist?
Is that the crap from the Pearls book about marriage?
I was raised in a house that was pretty much devoid of religious training. My dad — an atheist — showed how to treat a woman; he loved my mom with all his heart and did anything for her and never put demands on her. His advice to me before I got married: “You need to do something EVERY DAY that causes her to love you.”
When I got married — almost 37 years ago — I adopted the same mentality and have been following his advice.
And the IFB churches we attended ALL told me “You’re doing it wrong”.
So now I don’t go to church. Problem solved. 🙂
Yes, problem solved. And congratulations on being the greatest human being ever.
This is nothing but a place for people to submit their comments on how great they are.
You people are blockheads.
Especially when I play Minecraft. Thanks for noticing.
…I’m a bawdy bootlicker when I play DS Castlevania
Wow. The xian love is strong in this one.
There’s a song that I learned in Catholic school. It goes “They’ll know we are Christians by our love”. If you don’t care for Catholicism, I believe there’s a verse in King Jim’s commissioned work that says something along the lines of — and I’m not looking it up for an exact quote — by this shall all men know that you are my disciples, that you love one another.
I think it was Gandhi who said that Christ was okay, but his people, not so much.
If you’re going to come here and criticize how people feel about xianity and insult everyone’s intelligence, you are disobeying your holy book. I believe it was Jesus who said that the second greatest commandment was to love others. It’s not to call people “blockheads” because they don’t agree with you.
We sang that song at the Intervarsity Christian Fellowship missions conference. They were considered liberal and apostate by my fundy church.
Who said I was a christian? Idiot.
Ahh, so are you saying you aren’t? I would have to say that a lot of IFBers aren’t Christian. But usually nonChristians are more sympathetic to the purpose of this site.
Well, that was extraordinarily rude.
Eh, it’s par for the course for fundies. If they can’t defend their point of view, they resort to ad hominem attacks.
But hey, what do I know? I’m just an innately ignorant blockhead. (A shout-out to our trolls Brian and Jake.)
I can see how you would get that impression given how low the bar is set by the Lytell types. Really though, what you think of as “great” is closer to “normal”.
Who cares…I’ll sleep well enough tonight knowing I’m a block head.
At least I’m not a fundy troll.
…And the beat goes on, the beat goes on
Fundies keep pounding a rhythm to the brain
La de da de de, la de da de da…
B.R.1
Ya know, they call pit bulls “block heads”. I think Newfies and Saints have much blockier heads than pibbles.
Anyway, I like pibbles. Maybe I’ll change my name again — this time to “The Innately Ignorant Blockhead Lady Semp”. Or not. I’m thinking my name changes are hard for Darrell to keep up with.
Pibble is a new one on me. I’m going to have fun saying it. Heck, it’s fun thinking it.
Jake — I’ll gladly buy you a meal if your hungry, or a drink if you’re thirsty, or give you some clothing should you be naked.
I’m glad we agree that “being a Christian” and “being Christ-like” are two, entirely different things altogether.
In love,
— Don
Time seemed to freeze for a moment, like in those cheesy music videos where the foreground slowly fades, and everyone stared at each other, dumbfounded. It was such a brilliant stroke of rhetoric, that words failed the entire gathering. In one small paragraph, Jake had convinced them all that there was dumb, and they had founded it.
+14.5
Stories like Don’s (and other SFLers) are helpful because they show that marriages can be pretty great when you ignore the dysfunctional Fundy relationship rules.
0:45: “… squirt away …”?
Wait … never mind. Come to think of it, I don’t want to know what he meant by that.
lol… he said “squared away”.. as in the military term for everything looking right for inspection. But he was awful interested in Wifey looking extra spiffy when he gets home, so who knows?
Actually it’s a masonic colloquialism. Not getting all conspiracy theoretical but it is. The square and compass represent tools used to build and make things level and right. Therefore if something or someone is correct it is said to be “squared away.”
Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.
For some reasons, fundamentalists’ demands on women never sound like I Corinthians 13. There is nothing kind in telling one partner in the marriage to always be at their very best because the other gets to have a bad day and be pampered. It is quite rude to judge someone on their looks. And fundies really are demanding of women–do not use your God given gifts of leadership and preaching–we deny God would even give them to you because you are the weaker sex–and then make sure you are the perfect wife and mother–look like Proverbs 31 all the time. Those are ridiculous demands. Nothing in fundamentalism–be it about family roles and dynamics or any of their preaching and practice–sounds like I Corinthians 13 can be found in their Bibles. it must be the missing chapter.
Well said
This was so important to me in leaving fundamentalism: comparing what I’d heard all my life to what the Scripture actually said without the filter of the IFB teaching. One primary passage that influenced me was the fruit of the Spirit in Galatians; 1 Cor. 13 is another excellent one, as you explained, holding up fundy expectations to see if they actually match what the Bible says.
I keep coming back to Micah 6:8:
“He has told you, O mortal, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?”
one of my favorite verses. Walking humbly with God is also lacking in many of the Fundy circles.
very profound, and sad
We wanted that passage at our wedding, but it didn’t quite work out. By way of explanation, it was a Catholic wedding, and my wife and I were given two sets of passages to choose between for the readings. We chose the set with Corinthians, of course, but the priest was literally on a different page and thought we’d picked the one with Ephesians. We didn’t know about it until we were sitting up at the altar and the reader started in. The reader was practically choking, the bridesmaids were looking concerned, and my mother must have been in danger of a muscle strain from rolling her eyes too hard. Afterwards the priest congratulated us for our bold choice. Not a lot of call for that passage at weddings these days, apparently. Embarrassing at the time, but we have a good laugh about it now.
That’s hilarious!
My wife and I picked ephesians 5 also, but the shorter option that only really addressed the husbands responsiblities. I wanted it that way. We symbolised that during my reception I washed her feet rather than throw her garter
Not a dry eye in the room
Sounds like he’s trying to set the stage as to why his email might be found in the Ashley Madison hack. . . .
Dear Michelle:
Or her name … 😉
Christian Socialist
My husband played this for me when we were eating lunch today………..at my school……….where he was helping me all day……..at my work.
My thoughts included:
“No one is the boss or manager of my person, nor shall ever be.”
“Isn’t he telling about the movie Pleasantville?”
“This is why Anna will always be a Duggar.”
“Do pajamas count as looking like a million bucks?”
“We both live here. We both work jobs. We both work TOGETHER to keep the house.”
Q:Why don’t Wiminz need ta wear a watch?
A:Becawz thars a clawk on tha stove! HAYMAN?
Why don’t women need a driver’s license? Because there’s no road between the kitchen and the bedroom!
Seriously though, I have a friend who is on disability. His wife is the main breadwinner. If they ever have kids, he wants to stay at home with them. What would fundies say about that? Keep in mind that my friend has a very part time job. He can’t possibly work enough to support them. I’d like to ask one of these good ol’ boys about that.
Q. How many men does it take to clean a toilet?
A. None–that’s women’s work! Haw haw
“I have a friend . . . His wife is the main breadwinner. If they ever have kids, he wants to stay at home with them. What would fundies say about that? ”
Interesting question. I’m the breadwinner in my family; my husband quit his part-time job several years ago after our oldest was born. He’s a full time stay-at-home-dad now, does a great job at it, and loves it. And our babies are thriving. Our pastor and some of our other church friends understand, but some people at church (and elsewhere) give him looks of disbelief or obvious disapproval when they ask him what he does and he answers that he is a stay-at-home-dad. They seem almost more accepting of me working then they are of my husband staying at home. Why shouldn’t he stay home and take care of our precious babies? They’re his babies too. And it makes me angry that these people would disrespect my sweet husband and not appreciate how hard he works. If they want to think that I’m some kind of Jezebel for working outside the home, that’s fine, but don’t pick on my hard-working, kind-hearted husband, who serves in our home that way Jesus served his disciples. Well, enough ranting.
Q: Why does a bride wear white?
A: So the dishwasher matches the other appliances.
What do you do when your dishwasher stops working?
Thousands of years of history and they always choose America 1950’s. Insipid
Barf.
Not like those floosy ’40’s women. How about a little ambition? Straight Victorian or you’re librul.
Really, though I find the spunky go-get ’em Rosie the Riveter / Home Economics (real home economy, not dusting and lookin’ purdy for husband) woman of the 40’s to be much more appealing than the lost in the suburbs dreamland 1950’s TV housewife.
Remember the Fifties were a time of decompression from the Thirties (Great Depression) and Forties (WW2). The country was prosperous, you could own your own house & car in the new suburbs and go on vacation in your new car. After 20 years of grubbing for matches followed by a World War, it was finally Miller Time.
And now that things were finally going good after 20 years in Hell, don’t anybody dare to rock the boat!
…she realizes that the image of the ’50s housewife was created by advertisers as an unattainable goal in order to sell product, right?
I could see the pampering if your husband had an extraordinarily difficult, backbreaking, and demanding job like… coalmining or deep-sea fishing. But if he just came from sitting in an office chair all day, he hardly needs to go lie down in a darkened room with a cold cloth over his eyes while you massage his feet. What does this man DO?
All I can think is that men in 1955 must have been extraordinarily delicate, fragile creatures for them to need a silent, spotlessly clean house and kid-glove treatment.
I think Dr. Fundystan nailed it (upthread): Many of the husbands of the 50s had undiagnosed and untreated PTSD, and families had to tiptoe around them or they would beat somebody up.
Oh, that’s a fascinating, and extraordinarily sad, explanation.
They are under the false belief that all women were submissive, cookie-baking, SAHM’s in the 1950’s. My grandmother worked full time from the 1930’s into the early 1990’s.
My grandmother always worked from the 1930s to the 70s as she was a widow supporting six kids. Later, she just enjoyed working. My Mom, married in 1954, always worked as well. i was a very resourceful kid from an early age because I needed to do some things for myself. I liked being capable!
Back in the 1980’s the MOG’s wife at my old fundy church started a women’s Bible study group based on a series of taped sessions entitled “Philosophy of Christian Womanhood”. I went to the first session and never went back. It was degrading, belittling and simply nauseating. Wifey was supposed to do all the housework and childrearing even if she had a fulltime job and had to turn all her earnings over to hubby who was just supposed to be worshipped, etc. Gives me flashbacks just to bring it up.
It can be so devastating when women embrace this kind of teaching and they are suddenly left on their own with no job or financial management skills, with children to raise.
no no no you drink cool local micro, but never in a prechilled glass. A unchilled glass lets the head form better so you can enjoy the fragrance . oh and drinking is evil andif you drink you will get run over back a mac truck
I agree. You only need beer to be ice-cold if it’s bad beer.
Most beer is bad. Some is actually mediocre and marginally tolerable.
IILS:
Beer=good
Vodka=Nasty
BJg, clearly you need some re-education.
Vodka is the nectar of the Gods. Try Purity Vodka. Hard to get, distilled 34 times, and only 10% ends up in your bottle. Hints of chocolate in the finish. Oh, and it is distilled in a proprietary gold and copper still.
Ooh, that sounds intriguing, Dr F.
Most beer is bad, most vodka is bad, most whiskey is bad, etc.
But most people either don’t know the difference, or don’t care, or prefer the lousy stuff.
“BEER GOOD!
NAPSTER BAAD!”
I wasn’t a huge vodka fan until a friend returned from a trip to Poland with Zubrowska. Quite possibly the best alcohol I’ve ever had.
My mom gave me fresh baked cookies yesterday. I ate them with a cold A&W, though.
Even though I grew up in a very Fundy church and school, Dad didn’t exhibit typical Fundy attitudes toward Mom. I heard a lot of this type of sermon, but my example was a more true to life existence. I learned it was okay for men to cook, iron their own shirts, wash dishes, and pick up after themselves from my dad. My folks just celebrated their 54th anniversary by going out of town to a B&B for a few days, so it seems to be working well for them. (Disclosure-the cookies were baked for my youngest brothers kids who spent the night with Grandaddy and Nanny. I was there working on their house and was a lucky recipient of a few.)
Since I’m off work today, I’ll cook dinner. I guess the flip side of this “sermon” is I should shave, put on nice clothes, and greet my wife at the door.
Nah, I’ll just wear old shorts, a tee shirt, and be barefoot. I want her to recognize me.
My husband is beautiful cleaned up, but cargo shorts, t-shirt, scruffy and barefoot…..irresistible. So there you go.
I’m reminded one again of why I’m single.
I’m a terrible husband, since marrying in may i have ,
Moved 2 hours north so that the wife could begin her professional career. Found a job in another field at two dollars an hour less than what i was making.
Encourging her to get a highly specialize professional certification. I’m doing everything wrong as the man of the house! and i’m only 10 miles from Bob Jones to boot. You think with me breathing the same air that I would do a better job at keeping the woman away from her dreams. Man I suck.
Keep up the terrible job!
Yeah, keep up the terrible work, Bro.
What, do you let her top you in the bedroom as well?!
Sadly, this Fundy mentality has crept into Evangelicalism at large. John Piper recently put out a podcast where he said woman shouldn’t have jobs where they have authority over men. His Center for Biblical Manhood and Womanhood is rife with misogynistic teaching not too far removed from this.
Evangelicals are quickly becoming the new fundamentalists.
Dear MI:
John Piper ought to cultivate his masturbatory practices privately and in the sanctity of his church office, not on the internet for the world to discover …
You wrote: ‘evangelicals are quickly becoming the new fundamentalists.’
This is disconcerting.
Christian Socialist
More disconcerting– evangelicals are already the new fundamentalists. Some are worse.
That’s what I was trying to express ^upthread^.
There has always been a very blurry line, if any, between evangelicals and fundamentalists.
Hence the term “Fundagelical”.
Evangelism has more appealing window dressing, but aside from a few things (music, KJV use) there’s not much of a difference from IFB.
Same horse, different color. Poop output is pretty much the same.
Come on Piper. This can’t be true.
So women should turn down any and all promotions?
John Piper is quickly becoming very pukey. Which is too bad because I used to like him. Then he started talking about marriage. Oh well.
To be fair, CBMW isn’t Piper’s, it is Southern Baptist, and headed up by a few knuckleheads that are even worse than Piper…if you can believe that. And yeah, they are as far from Christianity as fundamentalist Islam, perfectly content to not only lie about “thus saith the Lord”, but even redefine the Trinity. From a historical perspective, they are heretics. From a common sense perspective they are morons. I sometimes can’t fathom how people like this end up with a job.
“John Piper recently put out a podcast where he said woman shouldn’t have jobs where they have authority over men. ”
And with these words, he will cause a bunch of followers to limit their income potential.
Either they will have to quit when introduced to their new female boss or start acting up, which will cause them to get fired. Either way, women aren’t leaving the workplace. Also, a higher percentage of women are graduating college than men. So there will be even more women in management in the future.
Buckle up Fundy men, there is turbulence ahead.
Speaker’s name please.
Flock-eater Bill Lytell
The guy resembles Schaapf. I was expecting him to start polishing his shaft any minute.
Meanwhile, in other happenings at Pastor Bill Lytell’s church:
Read the article. Lytell is more concerned that someone lost a weapon in his church. And he’s going to find that person and request that he or she never bring a weapon into the church again.
Hello? What about the rest of the congregation? What about visitors? Can they bring their guns and ammo, so long as the stuff isn’t left in a rest room?
I recently left the Catholic Church and started attending the Episcopal Church because of the gender/sexuality issues. I had been unhappy for years with teaching of glbt, contraception, etc. But when the pope (whom I admire in many ways, especially on economic justice and the environment) said he would not appoint women to head up Vatican bureaucracies, namely the highest ones, the Curia offices, because of “complementarianism” I had it. First the idea is no where in Catholic teaching or if it is it is a minor, probably debated point, and secondly, it is really big in evangelical teachings now days. I think he was pulling something out of his hat or getting it from the evangelicals. Why a woman can’t head a Vatican bureaucracy, when we have had women prime ministers and secretaries of state is beyond me. Also, I can’t justify not having women priest or bishops to my niece and other younger female relatives who just see it as crazy. I really, at my advanced age, started to take the patriarchy thing seriously. Probably seeing the worse aspects of it in ISIS behavior toward captive women has influenced my views as well.
Blech! My old fundy pastor would rant about the whole “make sure you look good for your man when he gets home thing.” I’m so glad my husband didn’t buy into that crap!
Comments are closed.
A silly blog dedicated to Independent Fundamental Baptists, their standards, their beliefs, and their craziness.
First!
Keep the house impeccable? I can’t even begin… This guy needs to be punched out by a woman STAT.
Indeed. I wonder what color the sky is on this guy’s home planet?
“Impeccable”
Sounds like something out of Jack Trieber’s ~620 page employee manual.
Got Armor All?
http://www.stufffundieslike.com/2012/10/staff-handbooks-north-valley-baptist-church-edition/comment-page-2/
Ronda Rousey can do the job of punching this guy’s lights out.
Only takes a few seconds for her.
I don’t see the problem with what this guy is saying. Of course his wife should be at home taking care of him; every adult with severe developmental problems needs their own carer.
Third
I walked out on a sermon like this once, after I had started thinking for myself. Took my kids with me and explained to them why we left. Felt pretty good!
Good for you! And good example for your kids, not allowing yourself to be bullied
Good for you! And yes, way to set a good example for your kids.
I’ve heard Ephesians 5:22 misquoted and taken out of context so much. It’s a fave of imbeciles.
Because they like to stop at verse 23.. and forget about verses 28-33…because that looks much more like an equal partnership, and not a
“In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 o“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband…”
A man who loves his wife as he loves himself isn’t expecting a servant to wait on him.
“A man who loves his wife as he loves himself isn’t expecting a servant to wait on him.”
This!
Is that the verse that goes “Slaves, obey your husbands”?
I’d like to beat him about the head with the word impeccable. It’s so horrid I can’t decide if I should laugh or cry. It’s funny until you realize that many women and men in his church will actually believe this and do crazy things to try to attain it. I will never understand these guys who think they are entitled to full time maid service, and wonder if they ever fully understand the endless aggravation some women go through trying to live up to their ridiculous standard of perfection. Or the families who feel needless guilt because a woman has to find “secular” work to pay bills, or even the unthinkable – that a woman might even *enjoy* her secular job. None of this is actually in the bible, there’s not a single verse about looking like a million bucks with a perfect house and perfect kids when the hubs waltzes in the door. Yet it’s preached as if it is.
It also fails to address the things that matter- like contentment. As usual, fundies focused on external appearances.
I have an old, sacred book that recommends exactly what Mr. Man up there is on about. It was passed down in my family as a precious relic. Women dress up beautifully even as they prepare dinner, they meet their hubbies at the door with a nice drink, the kids are well-scrubbed and respectful and never not smiling, and in return the husband dashes into the house as fast as he can after parking the large car that he has rightfully earned. And, of course, non-WASP people are picturesquely ethnic when they exist at all.
It’s the 1954 (I think; the cover fell off) edition of the Betty Crocker Cookbook.
What is not mentioned is that a great deal of this nonsense was a primitive attempt to deal with (undiagnosed) PTSD. Because if everything is not perfect, your dear hubby might might beat the holy hell out of pretty much everything.
Good point. PTSD as a major influence in the 1950s is not talked about much. But for a generation that grew up in the trauma of the Great Depression, and then had a large percentage of its men in World War II and the Korean War, (plus the ever-present specter of nuclear war), PTSD was surely a huge factor.
You’re right. The guys were all shell-shocked from WWII and resentful of the gals having gotten a taste of independence when they went to the munitions and aircraft factories so we could win the war. Then the war was over, there were few if any jobs for soldiers coming home. There was a backlash at the women and a crusade to put them “back in their place”. That’s why I hate movies from the 1950’s. The women are portrayed as bimbos and their characters’ speech patterns and accent are decidedly changed and there begins to be an inordinate emphasis on a woman’s figure and measurements. I grew up observing this and even as a kid it made me angry. Add to that recipe the precepts of fundy-ism and you’ve got a real potion already.
You know, it’s funny that you bring this up. I heard Mrs MOG say that the “Greatest Generation” didn’t have the PTSD that the latest combat vets did. They just sucked it up and drove on. The implication was that this generation of vets was weak and spineless.
She spoke only as a fundy civilian could speak. Her husband never served and neither have her kids.
You never come home from combat unscathed. Some have it worse than others, but there is always a price that is paid by the service member. Not to mention the families. Even if you’ve never personally had to fire in anger, you still have Katushas and other nasty things directed at you. Maybe you even watch your buddies die.
Every fundy who says PTSD isn’t real needs to serve a tour in combat. That can be either in the military, a contractor, or with an NGO.
They knew about the post-war adjustments back in the 1940s. Check out the film, “The Best Years of Our Lives” from 1946. It deals with PTSD, unemployment, alcoholism, and a host of other issues that returning vets faced. It also won eight Oscars, including Best Picture.
People who think that PTSD is something new, or that it started with Vietnam vets, have no historical knowledge.
Read accounts of “shell shocked” World War I veterans (Hemingway’s short stories, for example), or look at the documentary films of World War II veterans in treatment for “combat fatigue,” or look up all the insanity that swept the country following the Civil War. Being in a war causes permanent injuries. As with other wounds, some people manage to adapt and live fairly normal lives, while others can’t.
Dad flew 29 missions over Germany as a nose-gunner/bombadier in a B-17. He rarely spoke of the war.
In the weeks before he passed, he spent a great deal of time “reading” a book on his bomb group, the “Bloody 100th”. His mind had forsaken him. Just the day before entering hospice, aged 89, he raved on and on about Hitler.
His PTSD was evident throughout his life (clearly in retrospect).
Linn, I am very familiar with “The Best Years of Our Lives”. It is one of my favorite movies. It is a great treatment of many of the issues that combat vets face.
I completely agree that to disavow PTSD is to ignore history and post-war artistic endeavors. There is plenty of written history and living anecdotes, not to mention songs, literary works, and cinematic productions detailing the hell of war and the permanent wounds on the combatants’ psyches.
Bald Jones grad:
The Bloody 100th.
B-17 group that took some of the heaviest losses of any bomber group in the war.
A Group was 18-36 aircraft in strength. Out of those 18 to 36, the 100th lost 177 aircraft over the course of the war, often a dozen of them on a single mission — Regensburg, Berlin, Muenster…
Muenster. Don’t know if the Bloody 100th took off at full strength (lets say 18 aircraft), but only one of them — “Rosie’s Riveters” — came back from Muenster.
I heard Creflo Dollar, of the WOF camp, rant about wanting the house spotless when he came home and he’d better see the lines on the carpet left by the vacuum cleaner and nobody had better walk across it until he’s had time to sit on the couch and enjoy looking at it. Right out loud on TV like he didn’t have sense enough to know how absurd and control freaky that is.
Dear SFL Reader:
A woman’s place is in the house.
Also the senate.
Christian Socialist
+10
Don’t forget the White House, the Kremlin, 10 Downing Street, board rooms, or anywhere else she wants and is capable of being.
…..and in the mall.
“… with a hostile environment, this… anti-everything”
Hahahahaha! That’s rich.
May this hostile environment progress a little closer to everyone being anti-ignorance, anti-hatred, anti-bigotry, -chauvinism, -thought control, -unwarranted power and everything else that gives these blockheads a boner.
Hear hear!
Dear leo the lamb:
What a wonderful political benediction for all reactionary fundamentalists — not that there are fundamentalists who are not reactionary…
Christian Socialist
This guy has obviously never spent a day at home with children…who can destroy any carefully arranged home in nanoseconds. Nor does he have any insight as to how 21st century families usually need two salaries to make ends meet.
I was in an evangelical church in the Bay Area here in California 20 years ago. We had a guest speaker who went on and on about how women should not work outside the home, to a congregation where every woman under the age of 65 worked, and we had office managers, physicians, teachers, lawyers, etc. who were all female. He was never asked back.
This.
Don’t forget: this is the subculture that treats keeping children under control that is seen only in boot camps and prisons as fundamental to Christian character.
Of course not. When the MoG’s money gets tight, just preach TITHE! TITHE! TITHE! TITHE! TITHE!
I just learned that my wife needs a superviser when she is at home. Do I need to hire one of those too? har har har
The supervisor is “over top of her” if I recall the preecher saying.
Hmmm…
Top & Bottom, Dom & Sub, Penetrator & Penetrated.
Him and his slave have one son, and three grandkids. Does that mean the son isn’t married?
The helpmeets are implied
Also this implies that anything going wrong in the marriage is the wife’s fault
That message is pretty much why Anna is still a Duggar.
Ouch. Sad but poignant observation.
That is EXACTLY what I said to my husband!!
“Some of the best marriage advice you’ll ever get?” I’d like to give him some marriage advice, with a crow bar, or a pair of scissors. What a jackass.
If you’re tired of living, Buddy, just try giving my wife this “marriage advice.”
You must have one of the good ones, Big Gary.
Yes, I do!
You must BE one of the good ones, BG.
Tired of living and scared of dying?
Well, Old Man River, he just keeps rolling along.
Sorry, could not resist. I’m kinda like you, BG: Everything reminds me of a song.
Once again, this song comes to mind…with a slight modification. I know, it’s a frail attempt! Seriously, though, with every post I have to shake my head as Sonny and Cher perform in the echos of my mind:
The beat goes on, beat goes on
Fundies keep pounding a rhythm to the brain
La de da de de, la de da de da
Hyles was once the rage, uh huh
History has turned the page, uh huh
The jean skirt’s the current thing, uh huh
King Jimmie is our newborn king, uh huh
And the beat goes on, beat goes on
Fundies keep pounding a rhythm to the brain
La de da de de, la de da de da
Ashley Madison on the internet, uh huh
Little girls still breaks the MOG’s heart, uh huh
And men still keep their wimmens close to home,
Electronically they keep track on how their church has grown.
And the beat goes on, the beat goes on
Fundies keep pounding a rhythm to the brain
La de da de de, la de da de da
The MOG sits on his throne to reminisce
While not chasing girls to get a kiss
Fundy U keeps losing students all the time
MOG still cries, “Hey buddy, did you forget to tithe?”
And the beat goes on, the beat goes on
Fundies keep pounding a rhythm to the brain
La de da de de, la de da de da
And the beat goes on, yes, the beat goes on
And the beat goes on, and the beat goes on
The beat goes on and the beat goes on
The beat goes
B.R.1
Remember, the unsyncopated, 4/4 timing beat.
Good one, Big Red!
Huh. It reminded me of Ozzie. Crazy Train.
If this is the best marriage advice he can give a person, there isn’t anyone that should be taking marital advice from him. If he’s ever met a woman, she wasn’t wiling or able to speak to him as an equal.
*twitch* I can’t even watch this. So glad my kids won’t get this kind of message. It’s so damaging!
The bitch of it is that this sort of message can only do damage if a woman has been brainwashed since childhood, generally speaking.
That’s true. An adult woman who hasn’t been preconditioned to accept this kind of talk is more likely to just stare in disbelief at this weird Martian in front of her.
Another reason that the IFB is slowly dying out. It’s being replaced by the evangelical hipster boy preachers (think Elevation Church in NC).
Many of this new breed is equally misogynistic. We will continue to see fewer and fewer young people self-identify as Christians.
I’m not seeing what you’re seeing BJg. Sure there is misogyny represented in every group, some more than others, but the hip evangelical churches are far more likely to be progressive, especially compared to the fundies. There are evangelical churches all over the US that value gender equality. Christianity as we know it is going no where. Fundamentalist Christianity is dying a slow and painful death.
the Admiral
If Fundies continue to train their men to treat women like this, Fundy colleges and churches will start to resemble Ashley Madison —
Just a bunch of loser guys talking to themselves.
I forget who first said this, but “On the Internet, men are men, and the women are also men, and the children are undercover cops.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ruFIiJdvJSY
It’s hard to listen to a guy talk about how not to be a poser, when he is dressed like a 200% poser.
barf….this is equally as annoying as the other video… a combined total of five life giving minutes I can never get back
Token, I thought that at first, but there are a lot of small airports that one can just walk onto. I worked at an airport with similar hangars many years ago that anyone could walk onto. There was no security at all. Some share the property with other businesses. Our local airport is easily accessible from many points.
Having spent most of my career at major airports, it always looks strange to me to see someone just walking along.
My bigger worry is that this guy might be as big an idiot as his clothing ensemble leads me to think he is, and that he shouldn’t be allowed out without adult supervision.
I hit the wrong reply. Pretend this is in answer to TokenCatholic and not CullottesWithPleats, please.
I guess today, I’m the idiot.
I haven’t tried it, but I imagine I could walk onto the runway at my local airport. There isn’t a ton of security.
But I would be afraid I’d get run over by a plane.
BG, if it is a controlled field (with a control tower), the fear should be the possibility of the $10,000 fine for the unauthorized incursion. I haven’t been the recipient of one, but rumor is the feds like the ability to separate folks from their cash just fine.
as an aviation professional, i wonder why is he allowed to walk around on the ramp, unescorted, without any kind of badge
Yup, it is just taking on a different appearance. There is a group like that in my home town, They dress all modern but modest and the guys all sport the same haircut (literally). I’ve seem some of their members out at restaurants. The adult guys do all the talking and the wives and kids sit there like zombies eating their food and not making eye contact with anyone but dear old dad who stares them down at every turn. I’m not kidding, it’s downright creepy.
I was replying to the subject about some evangelical groups.
1 John 4:9.. because that God sent his only begotten Son into the world, that we might keep the house impeccable and look like a million bucks.
Watched it twice. Missed the “best marriage advice you’ll ever get” part… ?
He says it at the 0:52 time marker.
Please note that HE called it good marriage advice. I didn’t.
Right after he tells the women to meet their husbands at the door looking like a million bucks and kisses his fingertips. “Some of the best marriage advice you ever got” he says. Thanks, Sarah, thanks a lot. Lol. You made me listen to it again too. Are you sure you aren’t a Fundy who knows me and is trying desperately to turn me into a Stepford wife?
Wives should always be lovers too,
Run to his arms the moment he comes home to you,
He’s almost there…..
Great. Now I’ll have that crappy song stuck in my head all night. And so will you. Sorry!!!
Well, hey, it could have been “Stand by Your Man.” But at least that had a tune. A pretty awesome tune at that.
CGC, dating herself
Try this one. At least, it’s a nice tune.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IQ9n2_5mbig
LOL, my mom used to sing that one while she was working around the house. An older version, though.
As a kid, I learned all the old Gershwin/Kern/Porter/Berlin/et al. standards by listening to my mom singing while she puttered around the house.
Catholic GC, I didn’t know there were earlier versions until I read your comment. Thanks to you and Professor Google, I now know that the song was first recorded by Ray Noble and His Orchestra in December 1932 (Otis Redding recorded his hit in 1966). The Noble Orchestra version comes across as a charming Jazz Age artifact. The vintage of the song makes it easier to excuse the rather sexist premise of the lyrics.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iJMFurJxxF8
Dear Darrell:
You may never see this, but I’m having trouble posting. I couldn’t sign onto the ‘forums’ section without entering the pictorial verification code, and I’ve tried repeatedly to make a post since the morning post. I tried to post an moderately humorous reply to the video in the form of a bulletin board list from this guy’s wife but it did not display. Later, I created a second [similar] list but it did not display either. I reentered that same text [wrote it on notepad], and was told I couldn’t post that since it duplicated a previous post — except that the previous post didn’t show either. Am I the only one having trouble with this?
Christian Socialist
I’ll check on that for you…
Dear Darrell:
Well FINALLY … it went.
Anyway, thanks for the post…
Blessings!
Christian Socialist
You ran afoul of the spam filter for some reason.
Your comment should now be showing.
Dear Pastor:
Remember me? I’m your wife. In the interest of encouraging you to be a good manager, I’m posting on the church bulletin board this list of things I asked you to do this spring.
Fix the garage door
Clean gutters on house and garage
Replace broken light fixture
Caulk the shower
Repair the broken chair
Cap the chimney
Sort your soldier of fortune magazine archive, dispose issues you don’t want
Take the patio stones you promised Ol’ Al
Fix the table leg
Inflate camper tires and install
Take me out for my birthday last May
Give me sex the way I want it instead of taking it as YOUwant
THIS ISN’T NAGGING … THIS IS GOOD MANAGEMENT
Christian Socialist
PS: I’m not bitter…
My house might not be impeccable
But as a housewife I don’t just do housework. I also manage the bills/finances; do the yardwork; take out the trash; homeschool; change the oil; coupon; shop for and cook most meals, sew clothing and things for the home; and deal with workmen when needed, which isn’t often because I do minor home (electrical, plumbing, etc.), appliance, and auto repairs. I don’t think that the Proverbs 31 lady just stayed home and spent all day dusting, either. It doesn’t say that her house was tidy, but it does say she was successful at small scale agriculture, business negotiations, and real estate.
But since this doesn’t fit in the fundyland dream ideal of 1950’s suburban sitcom stereotypes, the Proverbs 31 woman would rub them the wrong way.
Fundies twist the Prov. 31 woman into an exclusively stay-at-home-mom.
Not to mention that the “maidens” she “provides tasks for” (RSV) are her servants. The Proverbs 31 woman didn’t scrub floors and wash grundies. She had people for that.
I have binders full of maidens…
+10, Mitt, er, Dr. Fundystan.
Christian Socialist: for the love of all the kittens in the world, don’t give them womenfolk a new way to justify nagging 😉 I can hear it now, I’m not nagging you, I’m managing!
My wife stays at home and homeschools the three young kids and takes care of a baby as well. How dare I come home from my job of updating a few spreadsheets, answering a few emails, and conversing with adults about the Astros or Texans and expect her to cater to my needs. When I get home, it’s time for me to give her a break and start actually working. Her job is the tough one, mine is the one that gets a paycheck.
I am the leader in the home, but that means when I’m doing it right, I am the lead servant. Kind of like that guy that once washed a few feet.
Interesting. Never thought of it that way before.
Yikes. I want your job. I wrestle with the deadlines from Hell every single day. I must not be living right!
Accounting + Excel = easy job
Excel is my nemesis! Excel is the Anti-Christ!
(Can you tell I was born without a left brain? Your job would not be easy for me, I guarantee. LOL.)
I’m in advertising. And no, it’s not anything like Mad Men anymore. Martini lunches? I wish.
What freakin’ planet does this nut case live on?
Even Ward Cleaver is less crazy sexist than this.
I kept waiting for him to say, “Just kidding!” Is this Leave It to Beaver? Teaching like this is why I still feel guilty if I as a SAHM don’t keep the house clean, even though I have a husband who doesn’t expect or demand it. (In fact, he routinely tells me to leave the mess for him to clean when he gets home.) But it’s hard to shake teaching like this when you were raised in it.
Well, no, because Leave it to Beaver didn’t dress up their social standards in “God said so”. And there is a reason we moved on as a culture – it didn’t work. In fact, a reasonably educated Biblical scholar would tell you that it is entirely contrary to God’s created order. But you don’t have to get theological to recognize hogwash as hogwash.
You better submit and let him honor you.
With open hand, back of hand, or fist?
Is that the crap from the Pearls book about marriage?
I was raised in a house that was pretty much devoid of religious training. My dad — an atheist — showed how to treat a woman; he loved my mom with all his heart and did anything for her and never put demands on her. His advice to me before I got married: “You need to do something EVERY DAY that causes her to love you.”
When I got married — almost 37 years ago — I adopted the same mentality and have been following his advice.
And the IFB churches we attended ALL told me “You’re doing it wrong”.
So now I don’t go to church. Problem solved. 🙂
Yes, problem solved. And congratulations on being the greatest human being ever.
This is nothing but a place for people to submit their comments on how great they are.
You people are blockheads.
Especially when I play Minecraft. Thanks for noticing.
…I’m a bawdy bootlicker when I play DS Castlevania
Wow. The xian love is strong in this one.
There’s a song that I learned in Catholic school. It goes “They’ll know we are Christians by our love”. If you don’t care for Catholicism, I believe there’s a verse in King Jim’s commissioned work that says something along the lines of — and I’m not looking it up for an exact quote — by this shall all men know that you are my disciples, that you love one another.
I think it was Gandhi who said that Christ was okay, but his people, not so much.
If you’re going to come here and criticize how people feel about xianity and insult everyone’s intelligence, you are disobeying your holy book. I believe it was Jesus who said that the second greatest commandment was to love others. It’s not to call people “blockheads” because they don’t agree with you.
We sang that song at the Intervarsity Christian Fellowship missions conference. They were considered liberal and apostate by my fundy church.
Who said I was a christian? Idiot.
Ahh, so are you saying you aren’t? I would have to say that a lot of IFBers aren’t Christian. But usually nonChristians are more sympathetic to the purpose of this site.
Well, that was extraordinarily rude.
Eh, it’s par for the course for fundies. If they can’t defend their point of view, they resort to ad hominem attacks.
But hey, what do I know? I’m just an innately ignorant blockhead. (A shout-out to our trolls Brian and Jake.)
I can see how you would get that impression given how low the bar is set by the Lytell types. Really though, what you think of as “great” is closer to “normal”.
Who cares…I’ll sleep well enough tonight knowing I’m a block head.
At least I’m not a fundy troll.
…And the beat goes on, the beat goes on
Fundies keep pounding a rhythm to the brain
La de da de de, la de da de da…
B.R.1
Ya know, they call pit bulls “block heads”. I think Newfies and Saints have much blockier heads than pibbles.
Anyway, I like pibbles. Maybe I’ll change my name again — this time to “The Innately Ignorant Blockhead Lady Semp”. Or not. I’m thinking my name changes are hard for Darrell to keep up with.
Pibble is a new one on me. I’m going to have fun saying it. Heck, it’s fun thinking it.
Jake — I’ll gladly buy you a meal if your hungry, or a drink if you’re thirsty, or give you some clothing should you be naked.
I’m glad we agree that “being a Christian” and “being Christ-like” are two, entirely different things altogether.
In love,
— Don
Time seemed to freeze for a moment, like in those cheesy music videos where the foreground slowly fades, and everyone stared at each other, dumbfounded. It was such a brilliant stroke of rhetoric, that words failed the entire gathering. In one small paragraph, Jake had convinced them all that there was dumb, and they had founded it.
+14.5
Stories like Don’s (and other SFLers) are helpful because they show that marriages can be pretty great when you ignore the dysfunctional Fundy relationship rules.
0:45: “… squirt away …”?
Wait … never mind. Come to think of it, I don’t want to know what he meant by that.
lol… he said “squared away”.. as in the military term for everything looking right for inspection. But he was awful interested in Wifey looking extra spiffy when he gets home, so who knows?
Actually it’s a masonic colloquialism. Not getting all conspiracy theoretical but it is. The square and compass represent tools used to build and make things level and right. Therefore if something or someone is correct it is said to be “squared away.”
Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.
For some reasons, fundamentalists’ demands on women never sound like I Corinthians 13. There is nothing kind in telling one partner in the marriage to always be at their very best because the other gets to have a bad day and be pampered. It is quite rude to judge someone on their looks. And fundies really are demanding of women–do not use your God given gifts of leadership and preaching–we deny God would even give them to you because you are the weaker sex–and then make sure you are the perfect wife and mother–look like Proverbs 31 all the time. Those are ridiculous demands. Nothing in fundamentalism–be it about family roles and dynamics or any of their preaching and practice–sounds like I Corinthians 13 can be found in their Bibles. it must be the missing chapter.
Well said
This was so important to me in leaving fundamentalism: comparing what I’d heard all my life to what the Scripture actually said without the filter of the IFB teaching. One primary passage that influenced me was the fruit of the Spirit in Galatians; 1 Cor. 13 is another excellent one, as you explained, holding up fundy expectations to see if they actually match what the Bible says.
I keep coming back to Micah 6:8:
“He has told you, O mortal, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?”
one of my favorite verses. Walking humbly with God is also lacking in many of the Fundy circles.
very profound, and sad
We wanted that passage at our wedding, but it didn’t quite work out. By way of explanation, it was a Catholic wedding, and my wife and I were given two sets of passages to choose between for the readings. We chose the set with Corinthians, of course, but the priest was literally on a different page and thought we’d picked the one with Ephesians. We didn’t know about it until we were sitting up at the altar and the reader started in. The reader was practically choking, the bridesmaids were looking concerned, and my mother must have been in danger of a muscle strain from rolling her eyes too hard. Afterwards the priest congratulated us for our bold choice. Not a lot of call for that passage at weddings these days, apparently. Embarrassing at the time, but we have a good laugh about it now.
That’s hilarious!
My wife and I picked ephesians 5 also, but the shorter option that only really addressed the husbands responsiblities. I wanted it that way. We symbolised that during my reception I washed her feet rather than throw her garter
Not a dry eye in the room
Sounds like he’s trying to set the stage as to why his email might be found in the Ashley Madison hack. . . .
Dear Michelle:
Or her name … 😉
Christian Socialist
My husband played this for me when we were eating lunch today………..at my school……….where he was helping me all day……..at my work.
My thoughts included:
“No one is the boss or manager of my person, nor shall ever be.”
“Isn’t he telling about the movie Pleasantville?”
“This is why Anna will always be a Duggar.”
“Do pajamas count as looking like a million bucks?”
“We both live here. We both work jobs. We both work TOGETHER to keep the house.”
Q:Why don’t Wiminz need ta wear a watch?
A:Becawz thars a clawk on tha stove! HAYMAN?
Why don’t women need a driver’s license? Because there’s no road between the kitchen and the bedroom!
Seriously though, I have a friend who is on disability. His wife is the main breadwinner. If they ever have kids, he wants to stay at home with them. What would fundies say about that? Keep in mind that my friend has a very part time job. He can’t possibly work enough to support them. I’d like to ask one of these good ol’ boys about that.
Q. How many men does it take to clean a toilet?
A. None–that’s women’s work! Haw haw
“I have a friend . . . His wife is the main breadwinner. If they ever have kids, he wants to stay at home with them. What would fundies say about that? ”
Interesting question. I’m the breadwinner in my family; my husband quit his part-time job several years ago after our oldest was born. He’s a full time stay-at-home-dad now, does a great job at it, and loves it. And our babies are thriving. Our pastor and some of our other church friends understand, but some people at church (and elsewhere) give him looks of disbelief or obvious disapproval when they ask him what he does and he answers that he is a stay-at-home-dad. They seem almost more accepting of me working then they are of my husband staying at home. Why shouldn’t he stay home and take care of our precious babies? They’re his babies too. And it makes me angry that these people would disrespect my sweet husband and not appreciate how hard he works. If they want to think that I’m some kind of Jezebel for working outside the home, that’s fine, but don’t pick on my hard-working, kind-hearted husband, who serves in our home that way Jesus served his disciples. Well, enough ranting.
Q: Why does a bride wear white?
A: So the dishwasher matches the other appliances.
What do you do when your dishwasher stops working?
Smack her and tell her to get back to work.
(yes, I’m going to hell.)
Ouch
http://youtu.be/-0I_vsNAvPg
The minister neglected to mention fresh-baked cookies and the importance of always serving (micro-brewed) beer in a pre-chilled mug!
Oh bother…
In the comment section:
“I am doing a 1950’s Housewife Challenge for 1 year”
:eyeroll:
http://www.ultimatehousewife.com/2013/02/1950s-housewife.html
Thousands of years of history and they always choose America 1950’s. Insipid
Barf.
Not like those floosy ’40’s women. How about a little ambition? Straight Victorian or you’re librul.
Really, though I find the spunky go-get ’em Rosie the Riveter / Home Economics (real home economy, not dusting and lookin’ purdy for husband) woman of the 40’s to be much more appealing than the lost in the suburbs dreamland 1950’s TV housewife.
Remember the Fifties were a time of decompression from the Thirties (Great Depression) and Forties (WW2). The country was prosperous, you could own your own house & car in the new suburbs and go on vacation in your new car. After 20 years of grubbing for matches followed by a World War, it was finally Miller Time.
And now that things were finally going good after 20 years in Hell, don’t anybody dare to rock the boat!
…she realizes that the image of the ’50s housewife was created by advertisers as an unattainable goal in order to sell product, right?
I could see the pampering if your husband had an extraordinarily difficult, backbreaking, and demanding job like… coalmining or deep-sea fishing. But if he just came from sitting in an office chair all day, he hardly needs to go lie down in a darkened room with a cold cloth over his eyes while you massage his feet. What does this man DO?
All I can think is that men in 1955 must have been extraordinarily delicate, fragile creatures for them to need a silent, spotlessly clean house and kid-glove treatment.
I think Dr. Fundystan nailed it (upthread): Many of the husbands of the 50s had undiagnosed and untreated PTSD, and families had to tiptoe around them or they would beat somebody up.
Oh, that’s a fascinating, and extraordinarily sad, explanation.
They are under the false belief that all women were submissive, cookie-baking, SAHM’s in the 1950’s. My grandmother worked full time from the 1930’s into the early 1990’s.
My grandmother always worked from the 1930s to the 70s as she was a widow supporting six kids. Later, she just enjoyed working. My Mom, married in 1954, always worked as well. i was a very resourceful kid from an early age because I needed to do some things for myself. I liked being capable!
Back in the 1980’s the MOG’s wife at my old fundy church started a women’s Bible study group based on a series of taped sessions entitled “Philosophy of Christian Womanhood”. I went to the first session and never went back. It was degrading, belittling and simply nauseating. Wifey was supposed to do all the housework and childrearing even if she had a fulltime job and had to turn all her earnings over to hubby who was just supposed to be worshipped, etc. Gives me flashbacks just to bring it up.
It can be so devastating when women embrace this kind of teaching and they are suddenly left on their own with no job or financial management skills, with children to raise.
no no no you drink cool local micro, but never in a prechilled glass. A unchilled glass lets the head form better so you can enjoy the fragrance . oh and drinking is evil andif you drink you will get run over back a mac truck
I agree. You only need beer to be ice-cold if it’s bad beer.
Most beer is bad. Some is actually mediocre and marginally tolerable.
IILS:
Beer=good
Vodka=Nasty
BJg, clearly you need some re-education.
Vodka is the nectar of the Gods. Try Purity Vodka. Hard to get, distilled 34 times, and only 10% ends up in your bottle. Hints of chocolate in the finish. Oh, and it is distilled in a proprietary gold and copper still.
Ooh, that sounds intriguing, Dr F.
Most beer is bad, most vodka is bad, most whiskey is bad, etc.
But most people either don’t know the difference, or don’t care, or prefer the lousy stuff.
“BEER GOOD!
NAPSTER BAAD!”
I wasn’t a huge vodka fan until a friend returned from a trip to Poland with Zubrowska. Quite possibly the best alcohol I’ve ever had.
My mom gave me fresh baked cookies yesterday. I ate them with a cold A&W, though.
Even though I grew up in a very Fundy church and school, Dad didn’t exhibit typical Fundy attitudes toward Mom. I heard a lot of this type of sermon, but my example was a more true to life existence. I learned it was okay for men to cook, iron their own shirts, wash dishes, and pick up after themselves from my dad. My folks just celebrated their 54th anniversary by going out of town to a B&B for a few days, so it seems to be working well for them. (Disclosure-the cookies were baked for my youngest brothers kids who spent the night with Grandaddy and Nanny. I was there working on their house and was a lucky recipient of a few.)
Since I’m off work today, I’ll cook dinner. I guess the flip side of this “sermon” is I should shave, put on nice clothes, and greet my wife at the door.
Nah, I’ll just wear old shorts, a tee shirt, and be barefoot. I want her to recognize me.
My husband is beautiful cleaned up, but cargo shorts, t-shirt, scruffy and barefoot…..irresistible. So there you go.
I’m reminded one again of why I’m single.
I’m a terrible husband, since marrying in may i have ,
Moved 2 hours north so that the wife could begin her professional career. Found a job in another field at two dollars an hour less than what i was making.
Encourging her to get a highly specialize professional certification. I’m doing everything wrong as the man of the house! and i’m only 10 miles from Bob Jones to boot. You think with me breathing the same air that I would do a better job at keeping the woman away from her dreams. Man I suck.
Keep up the terrible job!
Yeah, keep up the terrible work, Bro.
What, do you let her top you in the bedroom as well?!
Sadly, this Fundy mentality has crept into Evangelicalism at large. John Piper recently put out a podcast where he said woman shouldn’t have jobs where they have authority over men. His Center for Biblical Manhood and Womanhood is rife with misogynistic teaching not too far removed from this.
Evangelicals are quickly becoming the new fundamentalists.
Dear MI:
John Piper ought to cultivate his masturbatory practices privately and in the sanctity of his church office, not on the internet for the world to discover …
You wrote: ‘evangelicals are quickly becoming the new fundamentalists.’
This is disconcerting.
Christian Socialist
More disconcerting– evangelicals are already the new fundamentalists. Some are worse.
That’s what I was trying to express ^upthread^.
There has always been a very blurry line, if any, between evangelicals and fundamentalists.
Hence the term “Fundagelical”.
Evangelism has more appealing window dressing, but aside from a few things (music, KJV use) there’s not much of a difference from IFB.
Same horse, different color. Poop output is pretty much the same.
Come on Piper. This can’t be true.
So women should turn down any and all promotions?
John Piper is quickly becoming very pukey. Which is too bad because I used to like him. Then he started talking about marriage. Oh well.
To be fair, CBMW isn’t Piper’s, it is Southern Baptist, and headed up by a few knuckleheads that are even worse than Piper…if you can believe that. And yeah, they are as far from Christianity as fundamentalist Islam, perfectly content to not only lie about “thus saith the Lord”, but even redefine the Trinity. From a historical perspective, they are heretics. From a common sense perspective they are morons. I sometimes can’t fathom how people like this end up with a job.
“John Piper recently put out a podcast where he said woman shouldn’t have jobs where they have authority over men. ”
And with these words, he will cause a bunch of followers to limit their income potential.
Either they will have to quit when introduced to their new female boss or start acting up, which will cause them to get fired. Either way, women aren’t leaving the workplace. Also, a higher percentage of women are graduating college than men. So there will be even more women in management in the future.
Buckle up Fundy men, there is turbulence ahead.
Speaker’s name please.
Flock-eater Bill Lytell
The guy resembles Schaapf. I was expecting him to start polishing his shaft any minute.
Meanwhile, in other happenings at Pastor Bill Lytell’s church:
http://www.winknews.com/2015/03/16/police-boy-finds-gun-in-bonita-springs-church/
Read the article. Lytell is more concerned that someone lost a weapon in his church. And he’s going to find that person and request that he or she never bring a weapon into the church again.
Hello? What about the rest of the congregation? What about visitors? Can they bring their guns and ammo, so long as the stuff isn’t left in a rest room?
Why not?
This video was on Addicting Info:
http://www.addictinginfo.org/2015/09/01/marriage-advice-from-misogynist-preacher-highlights-backwards-pseudo-christian-beliefs-video/
http://www.picturequotes.com/img/2/14/13550/dont-make-me-poison-your-food-dear-quote-1.jpg
I recently left the Catholic Church and started attending the Episcopal Church because of the gender/sexuality issues. I had been unhappy for years with teaching of glbt, contraception, etc. But when the pope (whom I admire in many ways, especially on economic justice and the environment) said he would not appoint women to head up Vatican bureaucracies, namely the highest ones, the Curia offices, because of “complementarianism” I had it. First the idea is no where in Catholic teaching or if it is it is a minor, probably debated point, and secondly, it is really big in evangelical teachings now days. I think he was pulling something out of his hat or getting it from the evangelicals. Why a woman can’t head a Vatican bureaucracy, when we have had women prime ministers and secretaries of state is beyond me. Also, I can’t justify not having women priest or bishops to my niece and other younger female relatives who just see it as crazy. I really, at my advanced age, started to take the patriarchy thing seriously. Probably seeing the worse aspects of it in ISIS behavior toward captive women has influenced my views as well.
Blech! My old fundy pastor would rant about the whole “make sure you look good for your man when he gets home thing.” I’m so glad my husband didn’t buy into that crap!