106 thoughts on “Youth Conference Rules: WCBC Edition”

    1. I was first? Woo Hoo! I even looked at the video.

      Command number One: “Thou shalt respect and obey every adult.”

      Okayyyyy …. After the mouthiness of the critters in the picture, that would be just a bit hard to do.

      Of course, this video would make me wonder about West Coast Baptist College.

      1. “Thou shalt respect and obey every adult.”

        That can be dangerous in Fundy churches.

    1. Hey! We’ll have none of that around here.

      Don’t want eye babies either, so watch that.

    2. Don’t encourage the Abbot of Costello to hang around, he’s Catholic and we know how all good Fundies feel about *that*. 🙄

      okay, give a minute 😛

    1. Take Motrin, drink water. It’s the answer to everything, provided duct tape and 550 cord aren’t involved.

    1. those cartoons always creeped me out as a kid, just watching the lips move in that immobile face…

  1. What’s with rule #5? Why can’t you be alone? Sorry introverts. No introversion for you.

      1. I got dinged at Fundy Camp one summer because I liked to be alone and read or walk sometimes during the recreation periods. Also, I couldn’t do half the activities as I can’t do sports, and watching volleyball for two hours is highly overrated. Since I was already over 18, I told the counselor–in a very spiritual way, of course-to stuff it. That was my last camp.

    1. My Fundy college did not allow girls to be by themselves ever. I believe some introverts took to shutting themselves in the supply closet just to get some alone time!

      1. Why you can’t have young people being alone! You don’t know *who* they might be with!

        If you are a fundy, you have to expect the worst out of people. Except MoGs.

  2. I didn’t know the guys, and not knowing the college, this just looked stupid to me. Was there a point to the guy on the left who kept repeating 1600 acres, etc, etc?

    I haven’t found any of their videos that funny — just kind of “we do just as much weird stuff as any college in the nation, except we are Christian.”

    Doesn’t work for me — only irritates.

    1. I’m guessing he means WCBC has 16,000 or 1,600 acres of land and that’s more than any IFB College.

    2. Square feet/inches/mileage/yardage. That’s how big his Fundy U is. I guess size does matter.

      FWIW, I didn’t have any idea how big an acre was until I taught Beka math. There’s no such thing as a square acre because an acre is already measured in square feet.

      There’s a lot about the Beka curriculum that I don’t like but they have some decent math stuff, at least up through junior high.

      1. There’s a park in Albuquerqe where they have a field of exactly one acre measured off and planted with wheat or some other crop.
        This is a wonderful idea– it makes it easy to visualize just how much an acre is (less than I thought before I saw it).

      2. Supposedly, an acre was originally the amount of land one man with an ox could plow in a day (an average man with an average ox and an average plow on average terrain, I assume).

        1. Not at first. Acres in Scotland were actually smaller than acres in England in the south because the land was rockier. Later the unit was standardized to 66 feet by 660 feet. Yes, ten times longer than wide, because you did not want to turn those oxen around very often!

          I taught a course in mathematical measurements. Had my students learning all sorts of things they never dreamed of.

        2. Or a square with each side 208.7 feet long is one acre. I find that easier to visualize than a strip 66 feet wide and 660 feet long.

      3. Okay so I grew up on a farm so I know all this. An area 1 mile by 1 mile is 640 acres. That is called a “section.” So 2 of those is 1280 acres, and 3 would be 1920 acres. Figure an area 2 miles by 2.5 miles, roughly. We farmed about 1600 acres in the 1980s. Now it’s up to about 4500 acres!

        1. That doesn’t tell us how big an acre is, but it’s a very good illustration of how big a section is!

      4. Yes, they do have decent math stuff. And I did like their grammar. Thank you for saying that. I took it too.

  3. At least they said “opposite sex” and not the annoying/stupid “opposite gender”…

    Is “think about it” that guy’s catch phrase?

    1. Yes, many people now seem to think “sex” is a dirty word, even if you’re just identifying a boy or a girl.

      Yeah, I miss the English language …

    2. I don’t understand why “sex” has come to replace “gender” when referencing a person’s gender. I think “gender” is just more accurate communication. To me sex is an activity. When filling out a form, I prefer to answer the question “Sex?” with “yes.”

      1. Obviously, you prefer the newer meaning of “sex” to the one that it’s had for most of the history of the English language, then.

        1. Thanks for the English lesson BG. Yes, come to think of it, using “gender” is a more recent development in our language and I prefer it to what I consider the more archaic “sex.” Maybe my disdain for KJV onlyism has given me a bad attitude about some word usages in the English language. I guess that makes me a liberal legalist.

        2. Yes, BG I am aware that the word “sex” is not in the KJV. It is just how I perceive the word in the context of this conversation. Maybe at some point in my fundy lite childhood some adult mocked on the word “gender” and used it as an example of how the lefties and liberals are trying to destroy the English language and everything else good and proper. Kind of like how they hate on the word “gay.” I still instinctively cringe at the word “illegitimate” because I remember growing up hearing that word used to describe children whose parents were not married to one another. Funny how our upbringing can leave us so emotionally sensitive to certain words.

        3. The word “sex” was in use circa 1600, but it meant what you mean by “gender”– the characteristic of being male or female. Other words were used then for the act of coitus.

          In “queer theory” (a late-20th-century development), a contrast is made between “sex” as a biological fact and “gender” as the way a person self-identifies and is seen by others in society. But that’s not what most people mean nowadays when they say “gender”– they just mean “Is this animal or person male or female?”

          More historically, “gender” means “category”– included, but not limited to, sexual categories. That’s how some languages can have four or more genders, even though people who speak those languages recognize the same two sexes of people that everyone else does. For example, some languages have separate grammatical genders for animate and inanimate things.

      2. Anyone remember the promotional WCBC video Darrel posted some time back? They got some pretty gals at WCBC and if you closed your eyes for a minute, you’d thought they weren’t in the IFB camp.

    1. John Wilkerson, Jim Vineyard, and even Jack Trieber better send this video to their youth directors to learn how to do it “properly”.

      I believe Fundies are more freelance in California anyway.

  4. That was hilarious.
    The guy playing Rasmussen was very funny – when he said pound instead of hashtag, when he stuck out his tongue at random times, and of course constantly bragging about the size of the college but changing it every time. I don’t even know Rasmussen but that sounds like a fundy.
    I also got a kick out of the guy in the tunic looking at the sign for the women’s restroom and assuming he was okay.

  5. ah…….I love fundy prison camp..I mean youth conference. These guys just made a mockery of comedy. I mean Jack Trieber and Fatty Arbuckle no how to have fun at Golden State.

    I mean even at FBCH they have more fun than these dopes!

    Plus you gotta give props for their “racism” by picking on the black guy for wearing a do-rag. Methinks he’s their token minority.

    The “stoning” of the guy because he has a bag of doritos is a bit too much. George Carlin would roll over in his grave if he saw this.

    So yes I think we can all agree that attending a fundy “youth conference” is no different than going to the county jail.

    And more importantly, what would Jack Hyles think about all this???

    1. What would Jack Hyles think?

      Is he privy to the goings on here on earth from hell?

      1. Perhaps talk of Jack Hyles thinking is a mite far-fetched.
        Which of Jack Hyles’ glands would this stimulate? might be a more realistic question.

    2. Did anyone notice the “stoning” of the minority in this video? The black guy in the doo-rag/chains no doubt is there token minority. Seems like every IFB college/church is wanting one but FBCH doesn’t haven one…

      mhhmm……

  6. Jim Schettler is out in Trieberville these days? His imitator was spot on about how he minimizes & glamorizes the impact of legalists & always love to tell random unrelated stories about his family.

      1. I assume (and this video kind of confirms) that he’s still doing the same old tired routine of “everythings great here” rather than confronting problems.

  7. Respect all adults – ok. There are respectful ways of saying “keep your hands off me” – Obey all adults? Even if the last name is Schaap?

    1. Agreed. It is important to teach kids when they should say no. And to do so emphatically.

  8. Respect and obey all adults. Just like George Washington. Especially when he respected and obeyed the King of England.

    1. Ironically. George (Washington, that is) was given that name in hopes he’d be a good subject of the King, also one of the Georges.
      There’s a lesson in that somewhere.

  9. Did you know that George Washington ‘bought’ his way into his first elected public office via barrels of whiskey? 😀

    That has nothing to do with anything. I just had a conversation about this yesterday and thought I’d just throw it in there. 😉

  10. I am actually thankful for this video. As my church begins a youth ministry and outreach, this will serve as a reminder: “do not try to be “cool” or “with it”, you’ll just look ridiculous. Simply be yourself and sincere. Thank you for the reminder.

  11. Okay, it probably isn’t a good idea to bring explosives onto any campus. On the other hand, what all these stupid rules here it certainly would liven things up. 😛

    1. Yeah, well, just because it isn’t a good idea doesn’t mean you have to give them the idea while forbidding it. Did the story of Adam and Eve and the Tree of Explosives not teach these people anything?

      Forbid something, and even those who wouldn’t have thought of it in the first place will want to do it. That is rather like saying, “No bungie jumping from the third floor balcony.” Or, perhaps, “Do not cut the wiring to the auditorium sound equipment.”

      Paul essentially noted that the Law Itself creates sinning simply by existing (Romans 7). So does fundamentalism.

  12. Chill out people. Don’t let your hatred for IFB blind you to decent comedy. This was a funny video.

    1. I don’t think anyone who has commented here so far has been terribly worked up over the video.

      The video does have a small amount of humor to it but that doesn’t mean it is without stupidity. It is perfectly fine to discuss the moronic points of the video — of which there are many.

    2. decent comedy? I would argue the term “comedy” really cannot be used with this video. To me its a sad attempt at being funny by a culture who is so out of touch with the culture around them. And no one is angry over this video. No one’s hatred is pouring over. No one is over reacting. People are just commenting on the stupidity of the video and that they do not find it humorous. Last time I checked, that is not overreacting–just an opinion.

        1. I suppose it might be funny if you personally know the people in the video. but I really don’t get this kind of humor.

  13. The great youth leader himself Eddie Lapena needs to see this. He’ll try to outdo WCBC by having HAC students to minstrel acts etc.

    Jack Trieber and co produce the best “Youth” conference videos as was seen with DJ “Fatty” Uson in a previous post.

  14. Come on people. Do we have to leave the sense of humor behind as well as the caricature of Christianity? There were some inside jokes I didn’t quite understand, but I’m guessing 7th to 12th graders in that circle found the impressions and the videos pretty funny. It’s low brow because the kids are low brow.

    1. Ah, but they don’t dare let it show. One of the main rules of living in Fundystan is that only the Man-O-gid his very own self gets to exhibit any humor at all, and it’s best set off by putting down his wife.

  15. This video is racist and normally that’s all that needs to be said, but coming across legitimate comedy in an IFB youth conference video is something that just isn’t supposed to happen. Yes, this little sketch boasts some awful comedy and is extremely creepy, but there is successful, intentional humor in this IFB youth conference video.

    I attended Pensacola Christian Academy back when Schettler was the pastor and he really does spend a lot of time trying to explain how legalism is there to protect from ourselves. He was always the one to go over the contracts we signed to not go to the mall or listen to popular music among other things with us at chapel at the start of each year. This is totally his role in the IFB community. The impression was kind of okay with this in mind. The real highlight, however is the guy playing Rasmussen.

    Rasmussen moments:
    “Rule #1 says respect and obey every adult. George Washington…did he respect and obey adults? I think so. Think about that… Now we’re going to watch some college made Twitter videos…that they made at pound WCBC West Coast Baptist College…youth conference YC.”

    “Rule #5 says thou shalt not be found alone in an isolated area. You see Susan and I in bible college… we didn’t even look at each other.”

    “Look at this… West Coast Bible College. 32,000 square acres of foot millage yardage. Think you can explode that Independent Fundamental Lawn?”

    “Rule #7 thou shalt not enter a room with a member of the opposite sex. My son Mark. Think about that.”

    “Nope. Nope. My son Mark.”

    “This one time I got my Elliptical. Think about that.”

    It’s not great stuff but it’s good and it’s and IFB youth conference video.

  16. It would be terrible if these college students actually learned to think for themselves. I wish I could have someone micromanaging and controlling every aspect of my life. What a life!!!

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