The earth is full of pain and woe
And so a-hunting we will go
To save two legs or grab an ear
And make the sinful ones to hear
The good news of some heavenly sphere;
No time to fix the world that’s here.
It’s bound to burn before too long
And we will all have been long gone
The Rapture is our sure escape
before the world will Tribulate
Until that day we’ve but one plan:
To save the souls of our fellow man.
It little matters what they lack
Hungry? Here’s a gospel tract.
34 thoughts on “The Mission”
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Down with the Mountaineers! π
Is this a real poem? Poe’s law has me confused this morning…
Twitter says no. Darrell owns up to writing it.
Yeah, that popped into twhirl after I’d commented.
http://twitter.com/#!/stufffundieslik/statuses/142235248862826496
Just because Darrell wrote it, it’s not a real poem??
Who says Darrell can’t write a poem?
I think what RobM meant was “a poem actually written by a fundamentalist”
If he’s confused then my job has been done well.
Darrell what have you done? It will now be plagerized and stolen by Fundamentalists and read at mission conferences everywhere with much ado and amens.
The line, “Before the world will Tribulate” makes me laugh.
Yay for verbing! “Tribulate” is awesome. π
Another way to upset a fundy–Point out that Christ’s Second Coming has been imminent for two thousand years, that people have been in the “end times” since Paul wrote his epistles, and it could be another two thousand years, in spite of Harold Camping and Darrell Dunn.
I read this book in college: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0801058090/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&tag=maranathabibl-20&linkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0801058090 and it really helped me to stop worrying about the whole thing.
Thanks. Our library system is sending their only copy to the local branch for me. I look forward to reading it.
Props to Uncle Wilver for utilizing Inter-Library Loan! π
The Last Days According To Jesus by RC Sproul is another good book on this matter
Ahh perhaps another reason so many young folks leave IFB’s fatalistic world. It’s just plain depressing for young folks to listen to old foggy’s tell them your life on earth is not going to happen. Don’t bother with plans for the future, it’s all going to be horrible anyway…..
Why not look at the day as a gift from God? Thank him for it. Look for some opportunity to be nice to someone, thank someone, encourage someone! Life is really good away from these depressing closed minded fools! Whew…glad that’s over with π
I remember teaching young girls about the Rapture and them getting depressed thinking they wouldn’t get to grow up and drive, get married and have babies. After all, that’s all fundys think women can do with their lives. That was several years ago, and now those very girls are married and having babies. That doesn’t mean the Lord will not return soon so we should be ready, but in the meantime we should be doing more than getting a few more notches on our soul winning belt by getting people to repeat a prayer, but helping in more practical ways. π
“Itβs just plain depressing for young folks to listen to old foggyβs tell them your life on earth is not going to happen.” I remember this. I would always feel so guilty because I wanted to live and dream and not just “go to heaven” any day and meet the God who would have the GIANT PROJECTOR in the sky with every bad thought and word and deed displayed for all to see. The more I felt guilty about wanting to have a life and avoid the GREAT HUMILIATION the more I worried THAT TOO would end up on the BIG SCREEN for all to see. It was a miserable way to live. I hate the years the church stole from me. I try not to focus on it…so they can’t steal any more joy from me.
It’s little matter what they lack – Hungry? here’s a gospel tract.
How do you reconcile that with James 2:15-16 If a brother or sister be naked, and destitute of daily food, and one of you say unto them, Depart in peace, be [ye] warmed and filled; notwithstanding ye give them not those things which are needful to the body; what [doth it] profit?
What happened to obeying God’s word there??? β
Exactly! They back themselves into a corner there. In their desire to separate themselves from liberal churches that don’t tell people about Jesus at all, they end up going to the opposite extreme, ONLY telling the message and failing to do the good works that are COMMANDED in Scripture.
I’ve heard this defended by saying that since it says “brothers and sisters” it means that only those members of your own church are your responsibility.
I guess the whole bit about “love your neighbor” and the story of the good Samaritan to answer the question “who is my neighbor?” is totally ignored.
Not to mention, “If thine enemy hunger, feed him.”
(Proverbs 25:21 AND Romans 12:20)
This is one of the best things I’ve heard regarding our understanding of “the Good Samaritan”. Check it out when you get a chance. It’s by Michael Ramsden.
http://media.rzim.eu/ZTD_Jan10_Session4.mp3
I’ll have a slimline KJV, chick tract and a side of kool-aid please.
Ummm KJV tastes just like chicken…. fried chicken. And maybe some homemade gospel singing for dessert. (In the Garden, with Andy, is my favorite) π
Or how about Matthew 25:31-46? I guess fundies determine what is the whole counsel of God.
Darrell, this is masterful. I am impressed, for so many reasons.
Well done, Darrell! You’ve caught the Fundy attitude perfectly. Poor saps—you’d think they never read the Bible, since there’s no Good News in them.
Brilliant little poem. I feel like circulating it on Facebook just to annoy the fundies.
Good idea
This is awesome! …sending to fundy/exfundy distro list now.
I like.
Matthew 20 v 18-20 says we are to go into ALL the world and MAKLE DISCIPLES. That takes a lot more commitment than handing out tracts. Personally I have some problems with the doctrine of the Rapture, which I’ll explain some other time, but it sure is a nice idea that we won’t have to go through the Tribulation (“Beam me up, Gabriel!”) I wonder what we can tell Christians in countries such as North Korea, Saudi Arabia, China, Afghanistan about not going through Great Tribulation…..
Sorry that should be Matthew Chapter TWENTY EIGHT verses eighteen to twenty. George, you are a pain!
Reminds me of a line from a mewithoutYou song:
“While the rats by the tracks on these winter days
Seeking shelter from the cold,
Make a nest from the tracts of our various ways
That they can save their immortal souls”