Fundamentalists love to reference Ezekiel 22:30 “I sought for a man among them, that should make up the hedge, and stand in the gap.” Those are indeed inspiring words that invoke all kinds of images of valiant struggles of days gone where a few men would hold off hordes of the enemy.
In reality, however, if the call is the spiritual equivalent joining the fight at Thermopylae, fundies are instead out bravely defending an ice floe somewhere in the arctic wasteland completely unaware that nobody actually cares if they hold that ground or not.
What do you do if you’re standing in the gap defending and nobody cares enough to try attacking? What if after you’ve raised your Authorized Sword and screamed out “You shall not pass!” you suddenly realize that the enemy is fighting on a different spiritual or cultural battlefield altogether?
The answer is simple. Quickly write to the editor of a like-minded fundy periodical and declare victory.
I love the card. I have been tempted to play Redemption, as my friends and I enjoy playing TCG’s. Redemption is the “Christian alternative to “Magic the Gathering” or “World of Warcraft Trading Card Game”. Does anyone here know if its any good?
http://www.cactusgamedesign.com/redemption.php
I was going through a phase where I was questioning Fundamentalism and I wanted to know if there were Christians who actually played games like WoW or Magic, and I stumbled across Redemption.
Sorry, a bit off topic I know, but the card picture brought back memories.
My favorite card game of this sort is is Munchkin. It is so much fun.
(the discussion about card games is probably much more worthwhile than the original piece itself. 🙂 )
Munchkin is pretty awesome. I love Magic the gathering though, due in large part to my various decks which seldom guarantee victory, but are quite fun to play.
If you are “standing in the gap” and you actually are attacked for your beliefs, you can also bring up these verses and declare victory:
Luk 6:22 Blessed are ye, when men shall hate you, and when they shall separate you from their company, and shall reproach you, and cast out your name as evil, for the Son of man’s sake.
Luk 6:23 Rejoice ye in that day, and leap for joy: for, behold, your reward is great in heaven: for in the like manner did their fathers unto the prophets.
If you like Munchkin, you would probably like Killer Bunnies. http://www.killerbunnies.com/
A friend of mine who I used to play it with, transferred to PCC. Apparently underground games like these are a lot of fun to the the next generation of Fundamentalists. Perhaps there is hope yet, as long as there are gamers in Fundamentalism.
KB is glorious. I play all the time!
Not to stretch your metaphor too far, but as a military historian I can point out a few other things fundies tend to share in common with soldiers guarding places no one cares about–they tend to slack off on their discipline, manufacture enemies or fight amongst themselves, and eventually “go native.” While I’m unsure how a fundy would go native while garrisoning the KJV-Only Front, it must surely be a fearsome thing.
I like that, Jordan.
Ah yes, the stand in the gap passage. Don’t also forget the slightly more modernized illustration of the Dutch boy with his finger stuck in the dam, an illustration that showed up all too frequently in the fundy churches of my youth.
I once heard a pastor say tht his congregation had to stand in the gap of . . . wait for it . . . taking out the garbage because the county wasnt picking it up anymore. . . lazy mofos
My town has never had municipal trash pick up. The dump closed years ago. Now you pay a private hauler to take it.
The pastor you speak of should be ashamed of wanting government to take care of his trash. If you make your trash, you should deal with it! That’s the American way! REVOKE HIS FUNDY CARD!
I heard a beautiful sermon on this not too long ago. I did a count I think, of the times I heard “stand in the gap” (and this was before I had ever really heard of it much before). And I think it was a good dozen plus. Maybe 18? Not sure. But man, that was annoying to listen to.