Category Archives: Outreach

Mixed Martial Arts Ministries?

The great Phil Kidd has a new ministry: Mixed Martial Arts Camp! Jesus may love you…but we’ll ground and pound you until you cry like a sinner on Tribulation Night at a prophecy conference.

During your stay you will be instructed in MMA fighting techniques…It is the mission of this camp to instill self confidence, discipline development, respect, and defense against confrontation…You will be given daily instructions in techniques by Mr. Tom Seigler. You will have plenty of time for practice on the mat and great Bible preaching in the evening by Dr. Kidd.

To be honest, I think I’d rather go head to head with Frankie Edgar than have to sit through Kidd’s preaching. What confuses me about this site, though, is that the video at the bottom contains both music with drums AND a woman clad in karate britches. Phil is slipping badly.

Pre-Millenialism

Baptist fundamentalists are traditionally opposed to those who believe that the kingdom of God is now come upon us. In their view, this present world is ruled by Satan and things are waxing worse and worse and the days are getting darker and darker in preparation for the Rapture of the church (mostly for Baptists), the terribly seven year tribulation (mostly for everybody else), and then Jesus coming back to kill everybody who is left. Well, everybody except Israel that is. They get a pass.

While that viewpoint of the end times is well within the realm of orthodoxy and not at all restricted to Baptist fundamentalists, many in the fundy crowd have taken it in typical fashion and turned it into a license to focus all their energies on only one thing: soulwinning. For if the end of the world is nigh and people could only be a second from slipping into an eternal hell, then the only possible concern we should have is getting as many people to pray The Prayer as possible before Jesus shows up. Nothing else matters.

This explains why in fundyland most social concerns like feeding the poor and treating the sick are far secondary to this work of “getting people saved.” Unless you’re using food or medicine as bait for a gospel trap, there’s no good reason to bother with them. And anything having to do with environmental concerns is right out. Why spend time trying to save the planet when it’s all going to burn?

This reasoning also explains why a common accusation against those who are talking about scandals and evil being perpetrated in fundyland are often accused of “KEEPING PEOPLE FROM GETTING SAVED.” After all, what’s a little temporary abuse and anguish and torment? Exposing the truth will keep people away from our church and we’re the only ones around getting people to The Prayer. If you keep them from coming to our church then their blood will be required at your hand.

He that giveth to the poor…should probably be making better use of his time and money in these last days.

Commandments Concerning The Prayer

And when it shall come to pass that the invitation which never closes has once again been opened and the hymn shall be sung at length and the penitent shall walk the sinner’s trail down to the old fashioned altar that then shall he be led by the appropriate gender of altar worker in The Sinner’s Prayer. And the commandments concerning the praying of the prayer shall be thus…

The praying of The Prayer shall in any wise be preceded by The Question in which the altar worker shall inquire as to the reason for the sinner’s approach to the altar and establish whether he is a first-timer or a repeat customer. But as to the answer to the Question it matters not at all for the next step is the same either way.

And the altar worker shall in all cases provide the sinner with the correct words of The Prayer to say — for this is good and acceptable and not at all like those other memorized prayers the Catholics use. For The Sinner’s Prayer can in no wise be attempted by the penitent alone lest he fumble the words and lack a vital phrase and the Holy Ghost become wroth with Him and cast his soul into the outer darkness wherein dwell Presbyterians and other creeping things.

And even if the penitent shall claim to have prayed the prayer at his seat, he shall with all haste be made to say it again in front of at least one witness and then sign his confession for the record. For we know that a sinner cannot be trusted with The Prayer, since it is a big deal.

And if any person shall be so bold as to ask if anyone in the Bible ever prayed a prayer to “get saved” then shall they be labeled a troublemaker and be asked to say The Prayer themselves a few times for they are obviously in great need of it.

Independent Baptist Book of Everlasting Rules and Requirements, pp 11-12.