440 thoughts on “Having a Hissy Fit From the Pulpit”

  1. This reminds me of my own episodes of humiliation in front of the church — all done in “love”, of course.

    The problem is that the trauma of the “church discipline” was much worse than the offenses. At a time when I went to the church for help, I was essentially betrayed.

    The first time occurred when we had trouble with one of our children and Social Services got involved. No charges were brought, and we were cooperative to remedy any difficulties. But when we went to the church, the immediate response was to remove me as a Deacon publicly, in front of the church, and have everyone come up and hug me to show their love.

    And I took it. God forgive me, I took it. And I stayed at the church. The Pastor who humiliated me was leaving, and the Assistant Pastor, a man who I thought was my friend, became the Pastor.

    Years later, I became a deacon again. I was serving the Lord. But my home finances were not so good. Health difficulties, including a heart attack, imposed a terrible financial burden on us and we faced bankruptcy.

    And again, I was rushed in front of the church, no longer to be a deacon. And everyone came up and hugged me.

    My wife and my children wanted to stay at the church. And I stayed. But there was no real understanding by the Pastor. Just a thought for reputation. One person gave us a little help so we could finalize the bankruptcy, but not the church.

    “By their fruits ye shall know them.” To me, their fruit was extremely bitter, and I cannot think about the church with much favor. There are some very good people there, some whom I think would have disagreed with the decisions had they known the details.

    But there was no love in the humiliation I received. The people may have thought they were showing love. Maybe even the Pastor thought he was being “loving” in “disciplining” me for something I could not control. I certainly was no danger to the church! But no, if you face bankruptcy, you must be spiritually deficient and untrustworthy.

    My wife and daughter still go to that church. I do not begrudge it to them. But I can’t. It stings a bit that they still decide to go, regardless of what the church and its leadership did. But fundamentalism has deep hooks.

    It isn’t, of course, that fundamentalists are bad all the time. It is just that when they are at their most religious, when they believe they are acting in God’s name, they can be intensely cruel. I still have nightmares about the situation at times. Can one get PTSD from a church? I tend to think so.

    It makes it hard to believe that anything really good can come out of Faith, with that kind of background. I struggle to hold on to faith, but it isn’t easy.

    I apologize if this seems weepy or self-pitying. Most of the time I do pretty good and don’t think about the abuse. But the abuse happened, and it has had a lasting effect, and as much as I want to just shake it off and pretend it never happened, I can’t.

    1. Hang in there. I know it’s hard not to let men’s actions and attitudes taint Christ in our hearts. Not everything (or everyone for that matter) that calls itself Christian is. It’s a hard row to hoe sometimes. And sometimes one just has to say Christ is true even when others aren’t… even when we ourselves aren’t.

      Hate you have had to go through all that rtgmath.

    2. “Can one get PTSD from a church?”

      Yes, yes, a thousand times *YES*. That can sometimes last a lifetime.

      1. I have a dear friend who is hopelessly broken because of the competition between her PTSD from her abusive husband and her PTSD from the church that blamed her and told her he was “her burden to bear.” I am a pastor, and this ripped my heart out.

        2. That’s fascinating, PP. I have never heard of that technique before.

          And I have to agree, Ed. She may feel hopelessly broken, and she may even tell others that she, is but I have to hope–for her sake and my own and all survivors–that no one is broken beyond all hope.

        3. I retired to reply earlier apologizing for my use of the word hopelessly. It was colloquial, not descriptive. But her brokenness was profound and exacerbated by her church “family”

        5. Thanks, Ed–I hope it didn’t sound like I was picking on you, because I thought I knew what you were trying to say, I just felt some clarification might be helpful for others who might wander in and read this. I’m currently trying to pull myself out of the feeling of being hopelessly broken and I’m not going to give up; I am glad your friend has someone to stand by her through this.

    4. I am sorry that happened to you.

      I think PTSD has been expanded to cover so many things it risks becoming a meaningless. But there’s no doubt you were traumatized by the experience.

      Christian psychologists and counseling services have schedules full of people who’ve been damaged by their church experience. In some ways it’s more difficult to counsel than classical PTSD (war veterans, rape victims, etc) because it’s far more subtle– the wrong isn’t so obvious. In fact, because it’s wrapped in religious dogma, the wrong is so often considered right.

      1. Religious PTSD is just about the only kind where you’re effectively brainwashed into thinking it’s a good thing somehow.

        2. I think we need another term for spiritual abuse rather than calling it PTSD.

          If you read Hemmingway or _All Quiet on the Western Front_, you find a “Lost Generation” that once believed in the goodness of man and progress of western civilization, but no longer did and lived a somewhat hedonistic lifestyle.

          The end result of spiritual abuse can be a loss of sustaining faith. Spiritual abuse often accompanies domestic or sexual abuse but it usually doesn’t. But I’ve had counselors tell me that toxic faith is often more difficult to counsel because the individuals involved don’t think they have a problem.

          A veteran who develops a drug addiction and wakes up homeless knows he has a problem. An IFB couple that come in for marriage counseling know their marriage is in trouble but can’t see how the ways they treat each other are dysfunctional.

  2. WOweee, in the full length “sermon” he goes off on texting. Whatever happened to real communication (he says), like Hi Preeechur, how are you? Preech: I’m fine and you? Other person:Oh Preechur, I’m having this and that problem. P: Well boyeee, I’m gonna have to call you out on that during the service this mornin……

    1. W-O-W! That is a must read for anyone who has ever been in, is currently in, or is contemplating joining an IFB church!

      1. The sad thing is that there are bullies everywhere, even some behind pulpits of every flavor. I used to work in a United Methodist Church, where the pastor was a bully. She is still there with the board who thinks she is wonderful. Numerous people have left, but she knows whose butt to blow smoke up, how ever if you end up on her shit list – it is a lifelong placement.

        1. Numerous people have left, but she knows whose butt to blow smoke up…

          That describes my former boss to a T.

          Kiss Up, Kick Down. And that’s how the bullies survive.

        2. Yes, pastoral bullies exist in every denomination that I know of, but they tend to last longest in independent churches (those not under any denominational governance), because there a pastor is not accountable to anyone except the congregation, and the pastor’s power is so much greater than that of any one member that it is fairly easy to manipulate deacons or elders or other decision makers as the pastor likes.

          Although I have known of successful sociopaths in churches with strong central governance, too, including one of my former pastor, who has continued to rise within the United Methodist Church.

        3. Don’t forget that the congregation is actively taught to ‘not touch the Man of God’. When you get congregations taught not to hold their pastor accountable, when he is in an independent church and therefore not accountable to anybody else, you’re going to get major problems.

  4. I am actually listening to the whole mess, I mean message. I am disgusted and heartbroken for these people. I never attended a Fundie church of this type. I can say, with a fair bit of confidence, that in all the churches I did attend over the years I did that stuff, any pastor that would have pulled this crap would have been sent packing on the next but out of town. BUT, the people have to bear some of the responsibility for allowing this to happen.

    1. “She should have just left him when he started abusing her. She bears some responsibility.”

      Which makes me wonder how he treats his wife, tbh. Is he as brutal to her as he is to his church?

  5. Lets just all be glad we he got Cox straightened out in the video room or we might not have this YouTube clip. 🙂

    1. Cox should have cut him off and left the box. One Sunday my son was running the sound and power point. A friend was sitting with him, but they were not paying attention. The pastor didn’t follow the outline and during communion, didn’t say what she normally said, so Nick was waiting for the words to know when to change it. He was never asked to sub again.

      1. This has nothing to do with either of your comments, but I hate Power Point sermons.

        My wife and I visited a nearby church twice. Both times, the pastor gave sermons heavily reliant on Power Point slides. In each sermon, there was a quote from Oprah Winfrey accompanied by several pictures of Oprah.

        I didn’t need to go back to that church a third time, and it was hard convincing my wife to go to ANY church again.

  7. Actually, I need to correct something from my previous comment, or at least explain something. I said that the people of that church have to bear some of the responsibility in allowing this to happen. However, after watching the whole thing, I kind of feel like the comment I made was like blaming a woman for not leaving a man that beats her and abuses her in every way possible. On the surface, that may make sense, but, mental health professionals will tell you, that there is much more involved in the dynamics of an abusive relationship. Many people in abusive relationships simply can’t leave, until one of two things happens – something so horrific ends up happening and pushes them over the edge, or, they are helped out of an abusive situation by outside intervention. This ‘sermon’ is a classic example of spiritual abuse. Shaming, embarrassing, belittling, demeaning of others’ are all part of the abusive cycle.

    1. I can speak from experience when I say, they are blinded and the follow because they want to follow, they believe because they want to believe. I have been in something very similar. Until the Lord opens the blinded eyes they will continue to unquestioningly follow the man in the the pulpit because he is “god’s spokesman.” To come against him you might as well be lifting your hand against God, or at least that is what they have been indoctrinated to believe. 😥

      1. Don, I think that is only part of the reason – they get into this relationship, if you will, and there’s an excitement about the newness of it all – the honeymoon. As time goes on, they are subject to repeated attacks such as the ones witnessed in this video, but, if you listen to the guy – he berates them publicly, but, says right after, “I love you. You know I love you, right?” The message that sends is similar to beating the life out of your partner, then taking that person in your arms after and telling them you love them. The dynamics of this are so messed up. Anyone in a situation like this is made to feel they are nothing without God’s man guiding them.

        For a while, they believe because they want to believe, and they follow because they want to follow, but eventually fear takes control. They believe because they are scared not to believe. They follow because they are scared to leave. They are not so much blind as they are terrified.

    4. And this is why being this independent can be so dangerous. If the people are too deceived to be able to stand up for themselves, other pastors should be able to go to this man and show him that he is abusing the sheep.

    6. I think there are often warning signs that people ignore. Perhaps it’s because they want to ignore them (that’s been the case for me more often than I care to admit). Perhaps it’s because they’re trying not to be judgmental (that’s also been the case for me). Perhaps they were just plain naive. But usually there are red flags people either don’t see but should, or red flags they do see but ignore.

      Once you’re in a bad situation it’s a lot harder to find your way out because of the brainwashing and pattern of self-deception.

      The language of “blame” isn’t particularly helpful here. The person needs to take responsibility for themselves and learn from the experience. The person probablh doesn’t need to feel much guilt about decisions made in the past. There’s never a reason to hold the victim of deception and abuse as more guilty than the one handing out the abuse.

    7. Michael, I think you have described the cycle of abuse accurately here, and I do think it applies to this situation.

  8. I think a little sympathy for this guy is in order. Let’s look at things realistically for a moment. There’s “young Cox” for instance, the finest member of this poor pastors church. Just listen to all the Satanic and ungodly stuff young Mr Cox does! And he’s the finest member of the church! No wonder this humble, God-fearing, servant orientated Man of God is at his wits end. If that’s the finest member of his congregation then what are the rest like? A little sympathy is due, unless I’m mistaken,…. oh.

    1. By “nutcases” I do not mean to be derogatory about the mentally ill – who deserve only our compassion. I mean hideous people who manipulate others for their own ends.

  10. Love is patient: Fail
    Love is kind and is not jealous: Fail
    Love does not brag: Fail
    And is not arrogant: Fail

    1. You should go, sit near the front so he can see you really well, and “fall asleep”, head lolling back and everything. Then when he walks down to berate you during the sermon, just give a loud snore and shift. (Yes, I have this all planned out in my head)

      And if he actually forces you to wake up and stand, then tries to hug you, yell “BAD TOUCH” and run from the building. 😛 😆 (I make myself laugh)

      2. We’re only 3 hrs away and I’m trying to get my hubby to take me Sunday. I have the same sort of thing in mind. Of course I’d wear britches and LOTS of make up. Front row here I come. 😆 :mrgreen:

  13. Has this ‘pastor’ read the church’s own mission statement?!

    “Immanuel Baptist Church is a unique body with a unique call for a unique period in history. The very essence of this body’s name, “Immanuel – God with us,” implies the desire of God to lead us by His spirit, not by past, dead traditionalism. We are a specific family with a specific call for a specific time in history. Fulfilling that call requires us to walk with one foot in the truth and one foot in the miraculous, with our whole heart determined to die to self so we can come alive in Him – sanctified, justified, and anointed to fulfill our spiritual destiny.”

    “God with us…” – where?
    “…die to self…” – really?

      1. Doctrinal statements and mission statements are like software licence agreements, no one reads them, just check the “I agree” box and move on.

        1. Has anyone ever checked the “Do Not Agree” box when they are installing software? Anyone? Bueller?

        2. @Scorpio–Why, yes. I have checked the
          “Do Not Agree” box. The next option was uninstall, which I also clicked. I don’t always read, but usually at least scan the EULA. Some have “gotchas” I prefer not to agree to.

  14. I couldn’t help but notice how nicely dressed the pastor was, especially since our church is now casual. Often IFB churches think a pastor dressed in a polo shirt or even a t-shirt is bringing disgrace to the pulpit. But how much more disgraceful is behavior like this? The outside may be dressed up, but what is this man revealing about his heart? And which one is more important to God?

    2. “white-washed sepulcher”

      Matthew 23:37
      Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye are like unto whited sepulchres, which indeed appear beautiful outward, but are within full of dead men’s bones, and of all uncleanness.

      1. Matthew 23:15
        “Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites, because you travel around on sea and land to make one proselyte; and when he becomes one, you make him twice as much a son of hell as yourselves.

  15. this man is going to haunt my nightmares.
    Lest we forget, his wife’s car (the one he’s threatening to make his getaway in) was paid for by church members’ offerings. I personally couldn’t imagine telling people off, hopping in a car paid for by their voluntary gifts, and driving away.
    He threatens to hop on the road and find a podunk church with stupid people in it. My thoughts:
    A. you’re probably not going to do it because the podunk church can’t afford to buy your wife a car
    B. You’re not giving your present congregation any credit for having a brain. How could you be envisioning a “podunk” church filled with even stupider people?
    I can only give him the benefit of the doubt that he’s becoming senile.

    1. My mom always said who you really are will come out when you get older; whether from senility or just not caring, people show who they really were all along. That thought has often haunted me.

      I want what it revealed to be love and gentleness and joy not arrogance, self-centeredness, and meanness like this pastor is displaying.

      1. My mom always said who you really are will come out when you get older; whether from senility or just not caring, people show who they really were all along.

        I believe this 100% and then some.

        1. My mother said about the same thing too, a man (or woman) becomes more his (or her) real self as one ages. Sadly, it is so true for my parents. 🙁 😕

      2. I don’t believe that this is always the case. I am just learning about dementia and Parkinson’s induced dementia in the elderly. It is true to some extent, in my opinion, just not always.

        1. I do agree that a kind and gracious and enjoyable person may have a personality change as a result of senility. That doesn’t mean they were always mean all along. I also think that health issues, pain, confusion, loneliness, and fear can turn a happy person into a miserable one who then acts miserable to others.

          Like many sayings, there is some insight and truth to the belief my mom had, but there are always exceptions and qualifications.

    2. Well, perhaps he’s thinking the stupider the church members, the easier it’ll be to control them and wring every last penny from them?

  16. I’m just echoing others, but WOW! If he had called me one of his most worthless church members, and then asked if I knew he loved me, the answer would have been NO. I cannot imagine Jesus ever telling anyone of His disciples that they were worthless.

    1. OK, not quite worthless – apparently, Mr Underwood is the “sorriest” church member, and is worth 15 cents. THAT was humiliating. Called out by name for everyone to hear, and in front of a fiancee.

      Please, Mr Compassionate Preacher, drive away in your luxury car and give us a compromiser who loves us!

  17. I note that he owns a Buick Enclave, which is a LUXURY SUV. Wonder how many other members have or can afford luxury cars?

  18. I’m important. I’m somebody

    So glad he told us, otherwise, I may not have known.

  19. You say he may never come back. Well, he ain’t here now

    So, I can guess who fell asleep during English class, eh?

    And, by the way, Mr Big-Man Important Preacher, that boy IS present now – treat him kindly, and maybe he will return and stay awake and the Holy Spirit will get a hold of him. Drive him away in shame, and there is less chance.

    1. Sometimes I’m part of the Grammar Police, but here the guy’s poor command of English seems like the least of his offenses. How he says it is less of a problem than what he says and what he does.

    2. Maybe Pastor Important needs to think, that maybe, just maybe, the young man fell asleep because he’d pulled several all-nighters cramming for a college test, or had to work extra hours, or had a sick family member he was attending to?

    1. Don’t you wish we could all turn up on Sunday at his next service and just “boo” at him from the pews for 30 minutes, before all farting loudly and leaving.

      1. “My thoughts exactly!” 😛 Then we’d all climb in his wife’s buick and they can take us to the cafeteria. We’ll fill up the gas tank and show then the way out of town to the Podunk Church. He’ll have to take his cuff links off. 😎

    2. Just sent it to Anderson Cooper 360, his reporter Gary Tuchman has reported on abuse in the IFB.

  21. A verse came to my mind while watching that: “Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.”

  22. I made it less than a minute…by the time he got to berating the engaged couple, my stomach was in knots and I was shaking and crying.

    How dare he!? How dare someone who is supposed to be a humble servant insist on his own importance? How dare he demean people created in the very image of the God he claims to serve? How dare he call his supposed spiritual family worthless?

    Honestly, it’s behavior like this which makes “new age-y love everybody crap” extremely appealing to me. Except that love everybody crap is in the Bible. Oops. 😈

      1. Did you watch the whole thing? He didn’t finish with those poor people. There were others he pointe… um, I mean abused as well.

    2. It’s horrifying; there are no words to adequately describe the scene. And to see the sheeple hanging their heads… This verse has come to mind again and again: “Whoever offends one of these little ones — it’s better that a millstone be hung around their neck and they be thrown into the bottom of the sea.” Jesus Christ.

  23. At least give the man props for saying and doing what we all know Fundy pastors of that sort would LOVE to do if they believed they had all power 👿 👿

  24. God, this caused me distress to watch. I couldn’t finish it. I live with someone (most unwillingly – alas, for the love of one family member I put up with the other) very like this. I love you, I love you, you had better love me or I’ll scream at you, you have a bad attitude that I’m going to fix, but oh, it’s because I love you, I’ll scream at you because you don’t show me respect, you should respect me like I respect you you arrogant useless idiot full of hate, oh no, not like me, I love you, that’s why I’m doing this, now tell me you know that I love you.
    I am really upset, now. Major distress.
    Augh. God, these poor people. Jesus, please help them escape.

    1. I’m sorry that you have to deal with that. It must be so demoralizing and frustrating, but I do understand that sometimes we make sacrifices, even very difficult ones, for the people we love.

      Anyway, blessings as you have to stand strong despite the barrage of negativity and warped affection.

  26. “I don’t have a better friend than your mamma” Ha ha ha ha ha !

    I hope Cox quit immediately after uploading this video to YouTube. The guy spends hours working for this preacher, but let’s his friends hang out with him which the preacher doesn’t like. Total shame that the congregation lets him get away with it.

    1. I actually wondered about that comment – “no better friends than your momma…” It actually makes me think there may be a little something going on between Sister Cox and the dear Rev.

  27. I couldn’t make it past where he made the fiancé stand up. By that point, I already had a knot in my stomach and was shaking and crying.

    How dare he treat people created in the very image of the God he claims to serve with such disdain? How dare he claim love when all he offers is shame?

    2. “How dare he claim love when all he offers is shame?”

      That was very, very well said. So heart-breakingly true.

  28. Who was the guy that said people who think they are abused are psycho, or something like that? Put him in a room with this Standridge dude. Together, they can hurl insults and degradation at everyone. Then, when people call them out for abuse, they can label those people psycho and drive off in their luxury vehicle paid for by the worthless, sorry, psychos whose children will now turn on them. 😡

    1. That was Marc Monte who said that victims are psychos. And we can just put those two in a room alone and they can hurl insults at each other. And if one of them complains we can just call them “psycho.”

  29. Also, this attitude: “I’m important, I’m somebody, I do this evil because I love you…”, it’s Jack Schaap 2.0. If there aren’t already rumors about him, it’s just a matter of time. The pride, the arrogance, the self importance, the obsession over other individuals’ sinful history; soon enough, he will be ‘led’ to take a young lady or young man under his wings for personal discipleship, in the manner of Schaap, Hyles, and others in the list of sociopathic fundamentalist pastors.

  30. I watch more of his preaching and he tends to do this in every message.

    2. And this is the first we have heard of him. So the moral of the story is never piss off your video guy!

    3. I just watched 2 of his sermons and he wasn’t abusive at all. Yeah some of the theology is all messed up. But he was not abusive like he was in this clip. Maybe I just got lucky.

      1. Did he make it a point to tell the people how important his position was? Did he twist scripture to show that he should be revered because he was the man of god or the Lord’s anointed?

        The full sermon the clip is from had some of that as if to appeal to authority that he has the authority. It was a very authoritative appeal to authority …and the wheels on the bus go round and round, round and …. 🙄

  31. I get this concern, but putting all independent churches in this same box is painting with too broad a brush. I have been involved with independent Christian churches for 25 years and have never seen anything like this. It’s the warped fundie theology that is the problem not the lack of governance.

    1. I’d like to put scribes of warped fundy theology all in the same box and mail it to Chisinau, Moldova. Just sayin’.

    2. @Ed Taylor: I agree completely. I have been in many fine IFB churches; I’ve been in a few stinkers. I think I would probably walk out of this guy’s church, should I get there.

      1. I don’t know anything about IFB churches; they might all be terrible. I’m talking about independent Christian churches in general. Many govern themselves perfectly well. And hierarchical government does not prevent megalomania.

  32. This is the first chance I’ve had to view this. Not the way to start a weekend.

    Self-righteous, pompous ass!

  33. Oh the flashbacks. So many times there were sermons to “lovingly” point out the flaws in everyone but never once was it a member of the pastor’s family, or heaven forbid, the pastor himself. When a man cheated on his wife, he had to come in front of the church to apologize but when the pastor’s 21 year old son touched me inappropriately when I was 14, it was handled behind closed doors and I was told that it was my fault. This makes me so angry. As far as PTSS from fundamentalism, I never thought about it that way, but the fact that it’s been almost 10 years since I left and I still have nightmares must mean it’s left its mark.

  34. PLEASE STOP CONDEMING THIS VIDEO!!!!!This video is circulating like wildfire on YouTube and Facebook. The problem is, it’s taken totally out of context. Before judging and condemning this minister, you just might want to listen to the entire sermon on May 19. Here is the link: http://vimeo.com/66510051. He preached what most other preachers wouldn’t touch “with a ten foot pole”!

    If you shared and commented negatively on this video, you have a responsibility before God Almighty to make this right. I’ve been through this situation of people taking what you say totally out of context and spreading it like wildfire. Let me tell you, jumping to conclusions and playing God is a dangerous matter. People can die as a result of this. Relationships and families can be shattered forever.

    Your excuse that “you didn’t know” won’t wash, either. If you didn’t know, why were you so quick to believe the worst about this chosen man of God? Get on your knees and make it right

    1. Gloria, I have looked at the complete sermon and it is NOT taken out of context. Frankly, I feel sorry for you if you think that a “chosen man of God” preaches this way.

      By the way, the things he said PUBLICALLY to individually humiliate some members of his church were unscriptural.

      First, if he had a problem with his “most worthless member”, then he should have talked with him privately about that and not resorted to calling names like a 5 year old. Isn’t that the biblical way of handling church discipline?

      Secondly, he is wrong to say “Listen to me. I’m important.” I would refer you to the book of III John. People like Diotrophes, who like to be preeminent, have no place behind the pulpit.

      Thirdly, he has no right to subvert parental authority because he is a pastor. Don’t tell a mother to get out of the way while you humiliate her son from the pulpit.

      The biblical qualifications for a pastor require him not to be arrogant or quick tempered, and to be self controlled. By all means, please tell me how this man fits those BIBLICAL requirements for a pastor?

      1. You have totally missed the whole point. If you did indeed watch the entire sermon, you would have heard his preface that a lot of what goes on in today’s so-called churches is a farce. Most of what you heard were puns along that exact line. This man is trying to yank church folks back to reality. i say, “Preach it, brother!”

        1. Address the points I made, please, unless you can’t. Its fine to yank people back to reality, but you have to do it within biblical parameters. Public rants and humiliation is not biblical preaching.

        2. And let’s just say, it was all “puns” as you say. May I remind of you of Proverbs 26:18-19

          “Like a madman who throws firebrands, arrows, and death is the man who deceives his neighbor and says, “I am only joking.””

        3. Gloria he called out people and there private matters in front of an entire church. He is a rude puffed up egotistical jerk “pastor” who knows nothing about the tenderness and kindness that comes with being a shepherd of the flock. You are obviously a blind leading the blind follower of this man, right just a man.

        4. “so-called churches”.

          Yeah I go to one of those. You know… looking through the Bible I always saw Jesus loving sinners. The ones he openly rebuked were the ones that thought too highly of themselves…. hmmmmm

    2. I truly feel sorry for you. Your preacher man is an extreme version of what many of us on here sat under for years. When I began to examine my life and “what I believe and why I believe it”, I based it upon the bible and not what my pastor said. I then re-aligned my (and my family’s) life based upon what the bible really said and not what a man said.

      My family has found true freedom and grace in Christ and not a set of rules set by man to keep me “right with God”.

      My former pastor is trying to run interference to the remaining church members at my old church because we are doing very well now, we didn’t get sick, we didn’t loose our house, we didn’t start worshiping the devil.

      We found a loving church that is having an amazing impact on our area and around the world, I now have a better job, raise in pay. God truly is blessing, exact opposite of what IFB pastors teach.

      What this guy is doing is abusive bullying. I’m sorry that you are trapped in that situation and don’t realize how wrong it was. When I was in the middle of it I did not realize how wrong I was until I started a “real” personal examination of my life, once again, based upon the Bible and not man. In order to do this properly you have to put your Fundie(TM) away.

      Now that I’m on the outside I look back and try not to feel guilt for wasting 20 years of my life in that mess.

      Just for a tag line, our church does have a drum set, I’ve bought an ESV Bible, and with summer here, PRAISE THE LORD!, I’ve been wearing shorts every day!

      Rules no longer matter, its the personal relationship I have with Jesus that matters.

    3. Most other preachers wouldn’t touch it with a ten foot pole because they are smart enough to realize that IT IS WRONG! I don’t care what a person did or did not do – you do not single them out and humiliate them and destroy them in front of others. Get your head out of your @$$ and realize that people are not toys that a petulant child smashes and breaks and throws against the wall because he has his ‘widdle feewingz’ hurt. If that moron cannot handle someone falling asleep in his church, or someone not being there once in awhile, then he is in the wrong business and has no right to be standing behind a pulpit.

    4. Gloria, can you please inform me as to just what type of context you think could possibly make his actions defensible? Because I can think of nothing, myself. Help a sister out.

    5. WAKE UP GLORIA! There is no context in which an egotistical, self-important pastor is right! There is no context in which verbal abuse is right! There is no context in which announcing people’s private business publicly is right! There is no context in which threatening someone that “Your children will turn against you!” if they don’t support a them is right!

      Trying to defend such actions in a pastor, simply because of his title, is a sad indicator of the man-worship so common in fundamentalist churches. And as a side note, the title “pastor” does not automatically make one a “man of God.” One has to be a godly man to be a man of God. The man in this video is not showing the qualities of a godly man.

    6. Are you out of your mind, or just a Poe trying (and failing) to be funny? Do you really think it is ok for anyone to abuse others like this let alone a man who calls himself pastor? One cannot read the commands of Christ or the New Testament and ever think this kind of abuse is acceptable. The man is a liar. He tells people he loves them, while behaving like the king of fools. Paul tells us that love is patient, kind, not arrogant and does not seek its own. This man violated all of these. He has the spirit of Diotrophes – or perhaps Legion.

    7. I listened to all of the ranting I don’t recall any scriptural references-it was a rant, blasting people in the congregation. No edification at all.
      It was merely a man’s opinion that was expressed. Carnal baloney. You know it’s true.

    8. People can die because they criticized an abusive, self-important preacher online? Pray tell, was this intended to be as much of a threat as it sounds?

      The man told a young man that he wasn’t even worth 15 cents, a man who mattered enough that God felt he was worth the blood of His Son. And this preacher-man has the AUDACITY to tell him he’s worthless?

      Madam, please.

  35. With over 49k youtube hits, this NOBODY is getting all the attention and ridicule he deserves.

    1. Walk a mile in his shoes. Would you want someone to take something you said out of context and then broadcast it on YouTube or anywhere else? And would you want someone like you to quickly say you deserve it, without even knowing all the facts?

      1. As a matter of fact Gloria, the whole video is worse because he calls out another girl at the end for missing some church and getting an education.

        I notice you don’t defend what you are saying with the scriptures and you didn’t respond to my earlier post. Its because you can’t. This man handled church discipline the wrong way. He thinks too highly of himself (at least on this day). And exemplifies several traits which disqualify one from holding the office of pastor.

        I watched it yet again….waiting to here him say “just kidding” at the end. It didn’t happen, so I’ll assume we had the correct context. I won’t take up your offense though. If you people want to sit under that abuse, that’s between you and him.

        I feel for you.

        1. I’m praying that God will reveal His truth to you guys in a powerful way. I’m not going to cast anymore pearls before swine today.

        2. Yeah, the closest she comes to using the Bible is to use it to attack someone while ignoring the issue at hand.

          She has learned well from her “pastor.”

          Pathetic, and pitiable.

          The lyrics to an old song are echoing in my mind right now; lyrics that are completely foreign to people from “churches” like this one:

          “New life in Christ! Abundant and free!
          What glories shine, what joys are mine,
          What wondrous blessings I see!
          My past with its sin,
          The searching and strife,
          Forever gone, there’s a bright new dawn!
          For in Christ I have found new life!”

          So much better than verbal beatings from a man who doesn’t even know how to speak his native language correctly. How on earth can such an man, who speaks so arrogantly and angrily and hatefully, “be diligent to present himself before God as an approved workman who doesn’t need to be ashamed, accurately handling the word of truth?”

          One tree cannot produce good fruit and bad fruit. And this sermon was very bad fruit indeed.

        4. Hmmph. Are you calling us “swine,” Gloria? Really loving, that.

          Fundies always show their hand. Love is always conditional. The insults flow freely.

        5. ^^^
          Translates to, “I don’t have a biblical defense, so I’m going to stop talking after I passive aggressively call you a pig.”

        7. Dear Gloria, if it steams like a turd, squishes like a turd, ignites like a turd, and smells like a turd, then that wasn’t pearls you hurled at us….

      2. I’ve watched the entire sermon. The context is just as horrible as the insanity seen in the short clip here. This “pastor” is entirely abusive and should be the only person concerned about begging God for forgiveness.

      3. Out of context? I see you didn’t watch the whole thing, did you? BTW, if I see my neighbor beating the living crap out of his wife, I am not going to waste time calling the cops and exposing him. I won’t be wondering about if I am looking at something out of context.

      4. I have had many things said about me taken out of context. However my response wasn’t “get right with God you dumb posterior anal sphincter”.

      5. Hard to do since I am not acting like an abusive @$$.

        Beating God’s sheep (They’re not the pastor’s!) is never an acceptable option.

      6. Gloria Hardy, another member from your church (Earl Lawson) insists this video is IN CONTEXT and that Jim Standridge has been calling out people like this for years – and that most pastor’s don’t have the “freedom” to do this with their congregations*.

        Yet you claim that this video is out of context.

        So which one of you is telling the truth?

        * There is a very good reason Jim Standridge’s abuse would not be tolerated at most other churches…Healthy, biblical leadership does not act like this.

        P.S. This video now has over 86k views

  36. If you shared and commented negatively on this video, you have a responsibility before God Almighty to make this right. I’ve been through this situation of people taking what you say totally out of context and spreading it like wildfire. Let me tell you, jumping to conclusions and playing God is a dangerous matter. People can die as a result of this. Relationships and families can be shattered forever.

    Your excuse that “you didn’t know” won’t wash, either. If you didn’t know, why were you so quick to believe the worst about this chosen man of God? Get on your knees and make it right!

      1. I am a Christian, and getting on my knees to make things right is a natural response when faced with atoning for my sins. As usual, you are taking things out of context, and twisting them to your values. There is where the real problem lies.

        1. It has been my experience that what we say and do has much longer lasting effects than we can ever possibly imagine. In my life, taking things out of context led to the choice of my family to bring my mother home on hospice instead of leaving her in the hospital for cancer treatment. She died at home when they refused to feed her or take her to the emergency room for further treatment. If the rest of my family had taken the time to check out the facts, my mother would be alive today. Is that explanation enough for you?

        2. That is tragic and sad, but very specific. This is a completely different situation, and a good case can be made that all the necessary context is readily available.

        3. Gloria, if you truly believe that the behavior this man exhibits is godly, then I shudder to think what kind of god you are asking me to bow and pray to. The God I serve has been kind and gracious to me throughout my life. I believe every word of His word, and I can’t imagine a context in which this behavior would be acceptable to Him.

        4. Here’s another thought. If you are being taught that humiliation, whether public or in private, provides atonement for your your sin, you might want to reevaluate you understanding of the doctrine of salvation. Please know that those who have experienced the grace of Christ grieve with you in the loss of your mother.

        5. Gloria Hardy wrote, “As usual, you are taking things out of context, and twisting them to your values.”

          The values shown in that video are clearly dysfunctional and unchristian. There is nothing in that tirade that honored God. If you think there was good in it, you are too sick and twisted to be lecturing us about values.

        6. I’m sorry you feel your mother was poorly served by your family.

          Let us examine some of your other statements:

          “I am a Christian, and getting on my knees to make things right is a natural response when faced with atoning for my sins.”

          My dear Gloria, if you think *you* can do something to atone for your sins, you are closer to heretic than Christian.

          “It has been my experience that what we say and do has much longer lasting effects than we can ever possibly imagine.”

          You are indeed correct. Which is why the denizens of Stuff Fundies Like are so up in arms about what Jim Sandridge says and does.

      1. Out of context is out of context. Lives can literally “hang in the balance” based on words. I don’t think a lynch mob is going to accomplish a thing.

        1. Please cite the context that makes public humiliation of your church members and calling oneself important the biblical thing to do.

        2. That you even dare to suggest that a misunderstanding of context has occurred here is just laughable. The proper context is that if you believe ANYTHING, even one SINGLE SHRED of what this guy did during the portion of the sermon shown here is noble or justifiable…you are delusional.

        3. Lives CAN AND DO hang in the balance. This is why these so called men of G-d will have to give an account as to why their ego is more important than the story of Gods love towards men. These so called preachers of the gospel will have to beg for mercy on the day of judgement for the millions of souls that they have led to the pits of hell.

        4. Gloria, as has been said before, there is no context that justifies this behavior. Lets examine the contexts possible:

          1. He was only kidding. Nope. That’s not it. There is no evidence of jocularity in this tirade.
          2. He was disciplining. Nope. That’s not it. If it were discipline, he did it not in accordance with Scripture
          3. He was being funny. Nope. That’s not it. People aren’t laughing.
          4. He was being an example of how “others” are. Nope. That’s not it. The personal way he gets with people shows this is more than a mere illustration.

          So, Gloria, what other context can there be that excuses pride, arrogance, lack of demonstrating Christ’s love, being spiteful, demeaning and insulting? Please enlighten me.

    3. …”chosen man of God”…

      I’m so glad that I’m in a church where the pastors (that’s right, that’s an “s” on the end of pastor) where they are about helping people and not about making people feel like peons.

      The atmosphere is amazing!

    4. Gloria, Jim Sandridge is the one “playing God.”

      He tells people they should submit to *him*. Sorry. I have submitted to “pastors” only to find out they could rip like wolves. This “pastor” demeans his people.

      From the beginning of the sermon, he is dragging out people’s private lives into the open. Humiliation from the pulpit, with just enough words of “praise” or “comfort” to keep them sitting there, taking it.

      Talking about a man’s divorce problems, from the pulpit. “Part of it was his fault, but not all of it.” Then some words saying he knows he needs Jesus because of his problems.

      That was at the start of the sermon.

      A little later, talking (I think) of the same guy, he makes fun of his truck, his weed-eater, his intellect and his general poor condition, then said, “But he’s rich!”

      So, what set him off on this tirade? He saw someone nodding off. Yes, someone, for some reason, had the gall to get sleepy during his sermon. So he had to come down from the pulpit and get in this person’s face. Then as he saw the reactions of people to what he did, he started in on them.

      “If you loved me and submitted to me, you’d know what kind of heart I have,” he says, right after calling people worthless and telling others he is going to fix their attitude problems.

      Yes, I would call it a “hissy fit.” Yes, I would say that this man abused his people.

      As for whether he is a man “chosen of God,” well, you will have to find the original manufacturer’s label to convince me of that. Having a pulpit is no indication that he is chosen of God. Preaching sermons is no indication that he is chosen of God.

      I can guarantee you that nearly no one was listening after that. In fact, listening to his sermon, his preaching had deteriorated to mere rambling.

      He had lost it.

      Will God judge me for making a decision about what this so-called-man-of-god was doing in railing against people? Not one little bit. Will God kill me for talking about it? Nope.

      Nor will I ever, ever submit to such people again. I will submit to God as God enables me to do so. I will submit to civil authority. But not ever to the so-called religious authorities that want me to submit to them.

      For all that he talked about love, he showed he had no love in his heart.

    5. “If you shared and commented negatively on this video, you have a responsibility before God Almighty to make this right. I’ve been through this situation of people taking what you say totally out of context and spreading it like wildfire. Let me tell you, jumping to conclusions and playing God is a dangerous matter. People can die as a result of this. Relationships and families can be shattered forever.
      Your excuse that “you didn’t know” won’t wash, either. If you didn’t know, why were you so quick to believe the worst about this chosen man of God? Get on your knees and make it right!”

      Those scare tactics might work at your whacked church, but we don’t buy into that stuff here. You are mimicking your abusive pastor’s style – How horrible is that?

    6. This man has revealed by his behavior to be completely devoid of the Spirit of God, he bears none of the characteristics of a follower of Christ, and has clearly set himself up as the “chosen man of god” If you support him, then you had better get on your knees and learn who God is, because you apparently don’t know him either or you would recognize one who perverts his Word and sullies his Name.

      I am not joking, the ability to back someone of this ilk is evidence of a lack of genuine Spiritual life.

      Repent before your blind religious leader leads you straight to hell.

    1. Check out Keith Gomez, he is another one except with a Cajun accent. There are several others in the movement as well.

      I remember hearing Keith Gomez call down a little ole lady getting up to go to the restroom. Maybe next time she will wear her depends… bless Gaaawwwwdd!

    1. HA! There’s definitely a lot of talk about getting on your knees to make things right.

  40. The local news, The Skiatook Journal, has a facebook page. He needs to become famous in his home town too.

    😆

      1. Oh the irony. You will never guess who the newspaper’s Faith Life column was written by for this week…

      2. I posted a link to the Youtube video on the newspaper’s fb page. It is there when I am logged in, but missing when I logged off. There are zero comments or likes…has it been pulled? Does anyone else see it when you click the link? It is in the “posted by others” section.

  41. What part of Galatians 5:22 & 23 is this MOG displaying to his congregation?

    Hey Preacher, if I’m rubbin’ the fur the wrong way, maybe you should turn the cat around!

  42. I just sent an email to the news dept. of the local paper with a link to the video. This guy has written several articles for the paper. I hope the paper follows up in investigating this.

  43. I am not saying that the ALC (now ELCA) congregation of my youth or my current ECUSA congregation practice perfect Christianity, but the things I read here at SFL just keep on dropping my jaw.

    You know what would have happened if a preacher had dared behave like this in either my former or current congregations? At least half a dozen people in either parish would have been on the phone to the bishop that afternoon! And if the priest had not made a full and frank apology to all those he crapped on, he would have been out on his ear. It happened to a pastor in my old church who actually told a dying parishioner that he envied her her upcoming journey. Even dying as she was, she was pissed off enough to tell her daughter, who told the bishop, and that pastor was disinvited in short order. The congregation is in good health 30 years later and I doubt many people remember that guy; IIRC he’s no longer in ministry.

    But it seems as though there’s no way to get rid of a jackass in these independent churches short of splitting the church in two.

    1. Lol. If this happened in my church we would have burst out laughing before hauling the man outside and bundling him into a cab. Except for one or two guys I know who probably would have drawn down on him. Hey, it is Kentucky.

  44. Copied from a Google review:
    A Google User reviewed 3 years ago
    Overall Poor to fair

    I have lived in Skiatook 40 yrs and attended this church as a kid, they have made several changes over the yrs and the biggest one was when they hired Jim Standridge , My wife is a teacher in town at skiatook public Schools and we always heard that they were never in faver of the public school system. So we never attended. I was a close friend to someone who had a funeral there this past weekend and was shocked at the self righteous, self center, egotistical, non compassionate, arrogant, attitude this so called man of God showed. It is sad when a man who has dedicated his life to knowing the Bible and has missed the #1 thing GRACE . I felt so sorry for the family that had to set there and listen to this man PREACH , too bad it wasn’t a celebration of LIFE because this man deserved it. . Now I know how the people in Waco must have felt .

  46. There is another defender of the wicked pastor on Youtube:

    happy8888881
    This is Earl Lawson and I am your friend, or at least I thought I was and I know your father and I respect both of you, but I do have to say I am very disappointed in your comment. I must remind you that the church is not suppossed to be a social club, but a place to hear the word of God and be chastized if need be. I can’t believe you would say he does not preach the Gospel

      1. It is posted with just under 500 other comments on Youtube. This guy has posted other replies too.

    2. Here is another one of his posts:

      “He was not taken out of context he meant every word he said and everything he said was correct and was received by his congregation with love. He preaches the Word of God and he makes no excuses for it. I personaly love his preaching. I guess I do think he is something and he is importaqnt, because I know him to be a prophet of God. I know you unGodly outthere will not understand that statement.”

      1. If the congregation received everything he said in “love” then it is a cult by both definition and practice. I listened to the greater part of the entire sermon and it was not just the manipulation and the abuse but it was the twisting of scripture.

        Towards the end, around the 56 min mark, he went to 2 Corinthians 3:3 and made that verse out to be about the “minister” rather than what Christ had done, it was a clear misuse or misinterpretation of the word minister as he add the preposition “to” in his explanation so that it said “to minister” which totally changes the meaning of the verse. Given his exalted view of his office one can only conclude that he was using that verse as an appeal to the assumed authority he believes he has as “pastor.”

        However, actions do speak louder than words. He may say he “loves” these people but his actions, and his body language are screaming “Contempt” and “anger.” His ego is writing checks his spirit is unable to cash.

        1. Oh yeah. In conjunction with his horrible exposition of that verse he quickly segued into a rant about some people not coming down to the altar enough. (presumably he is keeping count of the number of times you come to the altar as though it is a measure of your spiritual health.) I believe his actual words were, “There’s some of you who’ve never come to the altar once since I’ve been your pastor.” (small wonder) Keeping score by the altar call… that’s petty.

          “The altar is a holy place it’s for the righteous.” …but it doesn’t exist in the New Testament Church. All New Testament references to the altar are in reference to the Temple, to the Old Testament shadow or to the description of what John saw in Revelation. So that is twice in less than 5 minutes he has added to scripture.

          Finally and I’ll close. 🙄
          He preaches on John 8:11 after spending a good chunk of this lecture being the Pharisee dragging congregants before the bar of the Pastor’s judgment. He missed the point of the very passages he was trying to preach on.Around the 58-59 minute mark he once again reenforces the Clergy/laity caste system of the church laying out the hierarchical chain of command in the church with the pastor on the top of the pyramid. And he finishes preaching on a note of gnosticism and patriarchy. Most effective cults use both gnosticism and patriarchy to rule by. He reenforces both in his summation.

          The altar call is prefaced with the “Fear of God be upon us” and “the respect and dignity of God be upon us.” THAT my friends is a working example of Cognitive Dissonance.

          At the 1:01 mark he talks about the altar being “the office of this church” The nest sentence tells the entire story: He says “If you don’t love this church…” all the while he is pointing to himself then concluding”then this altar means nothing to you.”. Using both hands to gesture to himself when he says that. The body language has given evidence that it is about Jim Standrige who is to be loved, he is the pastor, he is the church. He may as well have said if you don’t come down to this altar then it’s plain that you don’t love me.”

          Then he makes one more call-out to Wendy and her missing church while she is in college. Here he very specifically says to her “you count my life as something..very … secondary if anything.” What an EGO!

          One can only wonder how long the altar call was that day… how much more manipulation took place how much more guilt was piled on. Yet this passes for church, this passes as “good” preaching. 😥

        2. I hope God blesses you today Don. Thank you for your discernment and taking the time to share.

      2. Some people drink Kool-Aid, others snort it in crystal form. Here are more Youtube comments from Jim Standridge’s supporters:

        happy8888881
        “I don’t think you would have, because I’m even bigger than Ryan is and if If you even lokked like you were going to get rough with my pastor I would have went a few rounds with you. I don’t think you could last very long with me. I doesn’t sound like you mother raised to respect God or his man. It wouldn’t take you long to realize you don’t mess with my pastor, jerk”

        happy8888881
        “>Bro Jo, I will not talk bad about you, no matter how much I disagree with you . I bellieve that you should read about the extra judgement awaiting those that talk bad about the ministers of God. Paul tells us that only one thing is an abomination to him and that is Homosexuality. You talk as if God was created for us instead of Us being made to worship him. But, I will not talk bad about you.”

        happy8888881
        “He is not just human he is a saint of God, just as I am and so are you if you are saved. He did not have a bad day and don’t make excuses for his behavior. He doesn’t need the excuses. He was saying what needed to be said”

        Sarah Bradshaw
        ”
        Everyone loves & adores this man. He speaks great Truth & the sad thing is people cannot get passed the fact he loves is enough to HELP us. The people in the video room didn’t put this up, each sermon is on the website and broadcast. We love our Pastor. He is an amazing man of God. Watch June 26, 2013 at ibcskiatook For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Is it not those insides the church whom you are to judge? – 1 Corinthians 5:12″

        Sarah Bradshaw
        “I go to IBC & was there this morning. Brother Jim tells us what we need to here. The Bible says ‘spare the rod, spoil the child’. What you CANNOT see it that all 3 of the boys are smiling. They know Jim loves them & they know he isn’t being malicious. The first kid still comes, it HELPED him. Mr. Underwood does as well & the people in the video room had been slacking on their duties.”

        happy8888881
        “Because we love Bro Jim and we brought him here over 25 years ago he is the same now as he was then. We built a new church not because it would be pretty, but we needed the extra room. We grew that much”

        happy8888881
        “Maybe your afraid of your job. we as a church have given our pastor the freedom to chastize his flock when they need it. They needed it. Mr. Ferguson I wish you had the freedom in your churches to tell your people what needs to told to them. The congragation he is preaching to is the Sunday night crowd. These people are usually the faithful of the church and they know Bro. Jim’s heart and the love he has for them”

        😯 🙄 😥

  47. Earl Lawson? I haven’t met you, but let’s talk about this idea of the Gospel.

    Let’s see. I listened to the whole thing. Do I remember the gospel in that message?

    No. No gospel. No good news. He was talking about people who don’t love us. Then he demonstrated that he didn’t, even while he professed he did. He ranted a bit about the government, like a good cracked TeaPot who doesn’t know what he is talking about.

    The Gospel? God is glorious. We are sinners. Christ died to save us from our sins. We come to Christ, and He freely forgives us, gives us Salvation through the offering of His body and blood. He brings us into fellowship and joy. We can now go out into the world with peace and joy to serve the Lord in the power of His Spirit.

    That is the Gospel preached every service in the Episcopal Church.

    Nope. Nothing about that service even began to speak Gospel. Jim Sandridge rebuked people for not coming to the “holy altar” to make a show of repentance. Poor Pastor! Without people at the altar, he hasn’t enough to crow about! And I didn’t see people coming to his altar that night.

    What was there about Jim Sandridge’s rant that spoke of grace and the goodness of God? Why should anyone suffering through that rant believe that the God he represents was anything more than a tyrant, ready to get out the switch and whip anyone who crosses him? Indeed, Jim Sandridge’s Jesus has no beauty that we should desire him.

    On the other hand, where the Gospel is really demonstrated, Jesus is someone you *want* to know, not out of terror, but because of the real love shown to you.

    That is why I will never go to a Fundy church again.

    If there was gospel in that message, it was lost to the meanness, to the shouting, to the rant. It evaporated in the hellish heat the pastor gave off when he verbally lacerated his people.

  48. I’ve known this guy for 20+ years. We used to attend and I’ve visited a few times since leaving and it’s pretty much like this every time. What’s even more scary is the power trip that goes on behind closed doors. And like someone said before…they can’t leave. I was surprised that guy didn’t lay him out. I’m not sure I could have held my tongue…or fist.

  50. Several have suggested to just walk out, that would have probably been the “christian” thing to do, someone else suggested for folks to start “booing” that is very appealing as well, at least to my “flesh” I remember a well-known evangelist telling us all that Joel Osteen was going to split hell wide open when he died. Now I’m no fan of Osteen, but those kind of judgments were way beyond that fundy’s pay grade! I wish I would have walked out, but didn’t, it was a few more years later before I left entirely!

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