Standards

Getting Mad At Catalogs

217 Comments

You would think that if these catalogs bothered this guy so much he would ask them to stop sending them. Then again, some folks do seem to thrive on outrage.

The video description says “I will boycott ANY professing “Christian” catalog that sells pro-Catholic materials.” And I’m sure they’re really feeling it, pal. Well done.

217 thoughts on “Getting Mad At Catalogs”

  2. I remember the old J. C. Penney and Sears catalogs we’d look at near Christmastime!

    1. PW- my grandma would give us a Sears Wish Book, and a $5.00 limit. My brothers and I would pick out our presents and than be expected to act surprised on Christmas when we opened them. Five bucks got some pretty cool presents back in the day.

  4. At the 3:45 mark, I had had enough condescension.

    Nice home-made “decal” on his desk Bible.

    I wonder if the grocery store where he buys his Welch’s also sells alcohol?

    1. I made it just past 4.00 minutes. After his blather about the Codex Sinaiticus, I couldn’t handle his Pharisaical proclamations of sin and damnation on people who purchase from CBD and their ilk.

  5. well, of course, communion with a chalice and a wafer with a cross on it are just sooooo disgusting.

    What an ignorant ass. I still don’t get why we are supposed to hate modern Roman Catholics today. Oh yeah. . .Hate ALL the things!!

  6. More than anything else, this guy’s attitude blows me away. He comes across to me at least as arrogant, and condescending.

    2. It is a learned behavior. We were taught to have this attitude by our HAC graduate preacher from the pulpit. it’s such a sad way to live. So glad I’ve been freed from this cult!

      1. Very true that the attitude seems to go with being a Fundy, but for me anyways, it still blows my mind that they are so serious about this, but I guess as the saying goes, “but for the grace of God there go I”

  8. 9 minutes long?! Youtube should start putting an error message on movies over 3-4 minutes long that says something like: “WARNING, You should know that nobody is going to watch this because you’re talking to damn long, right?”

  9. This “gentleman” should read, study, memorize and apply Colossians 3:12 “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with COMPASSION, KINDNESS, HUMILITY, GENTLENESS and PATIENCE.

    I’m so thankful that I no longer side with these poor, misguided, deceived people. God have mercy on them. 🙁

  10. I love how he says he hates the Roman Catholic “system” because “it’s a system that says ‘we are right and everyone else is wrong'”.

    Also, did I see that the 2008 catalog he paged through listed a “music tTAPES, CD’s” section?

    1. I have heard Christians – and not just Fundy-types – say “I don’t hate Catholics, just the Roman Catholic Church.” Isn’t that a bit like saying “I don’t hate you, just your family?”

  11. Did anyone else think his reason for why catholosism sounded an awful lot like fundyism? “we’re right. Everyone else is wrong”/trying to force people to convert at the threat or execution (if not immediate at least in the Great Battle of Armaggeddon) 🙄

    2. There is a reason why fundyism reminds you of Romanism. Consider these “coincidences”:
      Infant Baptism = Baby Dedication
      Confirmation = Professions of faith
      Confession = Getting right at the altar
      Pope = MOG
      Catholic Saints = Jack Hyles, Lester Roloff, etc
      Ex Cathedra teachings = “Baptist” standards
      I could go on and on. I am convinced that fundyism is a first cousin to Catholicism.

    3. He said that the Catholic Church “in the twentieth century” forced people to convert and executed those who wouldn’t. I’m not denying that Catholic rulers, if not the Church itself, did this a few centuries ago, but I never heard of Catholics doing this as recently as the twentieth century. What’s he talking about?

  14. The type of catalog I hate is when I buy something on line or in the store, and they send me both e-mails of their sales and paper catalogs. I mean, really! Save a tree, folks, I don’t need both! 🙄

    1. I suppose Mr. Persnickitty has a point, Christian rock does usually sound rather crummy, all the noise and idiocy of a Top Forty standard and all the lackluster verses of a hyped-up hymn. 😀

        1. Double my bad 😳 but the term “persnickety” is such a good one, esp for someone who makes such a big deal over little dumb things. You do get credit for reviving such a useful word. 🙂

        2. I thought your FIRST name is Persnickety and your LAST name is Polecat. Now, if she would have called him Mr. Polecat… 😉

        3. Regardless of what your husband’s name is, do you think he is a model that all men should emulate? Should we all want our wives to be strippers and work the pole, just to show those darn fundies how non-uptight we are and how liberal we are in sharing our wives? I find you a fascinating poster and I’ve always been old-fashioned in that I consider my sex life with my wife to be sacred. Maybe I’m too old and out of date, but having my wife be a stripper would somehow make our sex life less special when I know she’s sharing her self with everyone at the bar. Am I too old and still clinging too heavily to my guns, religion, and fundy ways?

        4. Mr. Jenkins,

          You have a dirty mind.

          When you read the name polecat, why did you think of a stripper working a pole?

          A polecat is an animal….really it is.

          Per Wikipedia:

          “Several species of the weasel family of animals, including:
          The striped polecat, Ictonyx striatus
          The steppe polecat, Mustela eversmanii
          The American polecat (black-footed ferret), Mustela nigripes
          The European polecat, Mustela putorius
          The marbled polecat, Vormela peregusna
          Note: In much of the United States, the word “polecat” is almost exclusively applied to skunks.”

          As your rude assumption has been pointed out and corrected, the proper thing for you to do now is apologize to this young lady.

          You are welcome.

        5. Didn’t PP have this same misunderstanding someone else? He immediately assumed “polecat” was the term for a stripper. Lol!! Isn’t it typical how fundies run straight to the gutter with everything?!! Talk about reprobate minds! Holy crap! 👿

        6. Used2 BeeFundy, YOU are the one who should apologize. You are the one making some weird connection that a woman’s body is “dirty.” If a woman wants to empower herself by not calling her body “dirty” and something that should be hidden away in shame, then more power to her! You sir, are the sick one with a sick mind.

        7. Misteltorf,

          Stripping naked for the sexual stimulation of a bunch of inebriated losers is hardly an empowering thing for a woman.

          There are so many healthier and self-respecting ways to gain empowerment – and stripping isn’t one of ’em.

        1. Well excuuuuse me, Mr. Smokey Bear, Steve Irwin and Mr. Know it all, all rolled into one. Hate to break it to you, but many of us out here in the real world just aren’t all that familiar with the skunk genus and the intricacies of the cat families. For the longest time I too thought this Polecat lady was proudly proclaiming her freedom as a woman to use her body as she chooses. What kind of person actually knew it was a name referring to an animal and not a Woman’s Empowerment agenda? Me thinkest thou doth protesteth too muchest.

  16. I like the black bible on the desk with the printed out label “KJV”. I guess he does that as a safeguard so he doesn’t touch the unclean one.

  17. Near the beginning he says “I don’t want 90-95% of the junk in here”.

    Kind of how I feel about what he is selling on his “table”.

    1. When he said that he didn’t want 90-95% of what was in the catalog, I thought: “That’s true of every catalog I’ve ever received.”

      2. In my experience, those catalogs have three main audiences: women, women who are mothers, and the local scholarly types who need or want things like loose-leaf Bibles or facsimile texts that the local Christian bookstore doesn’t know exist.

        For instance, the one a friend of the family gets is the only place around here I’ve seen 1611 KJVs, orderable with or without the apocrypha that were originally in the translation, as anything but a facsimile edition (and that was the anniversary edition Walmart got a single shipment of and once they were gone, they were gone).

        So of course he’s not going to want much of anything from them! He’s not a woman, if he has kids he probably considers keeping them occupied his wife’s business, and since he already has his thoroughly personalized KJV right there and acknowledges no other text, there’s nothing there for him.

  18. Also, around the 6 minute mark he says something along the lines of “all the great material in here”. The page that is being shown is a listing of crap from Sam Gipp. 😯

  19. Yep his right, cause my little who went through communicants class in our Presbyterian church was learning to be a catholic. We as a whole family came together for her first communion. It was lovely. It was Protestant! I’m so sorry he has such limited knowledge of our the faith and spends time hating Catholics.

  20. I’m in class now, so I can’t watch the video, but the title of this post reminds me of a time at PCC when one of the chapel speakers told about finding his 12 year-old son hiding and looking at the lingerie section of the JCPenney catalog. As I listened, I felt so sorry for that poor kid whose dad was telling his weaknesses to 5000 or so college students. That was 12 years ago, and I sometimes still wonder how he turned out.

        2. I was, too. And I was snobby on top of that. But I’m working on it and have almost recovered. 😉

        4. I was a jerk back in college, too, now that I think about it. 🙁

          I hope I’m better now, but then, I’d be the last to know, wouldn’t I?

      3. Wow. I remember that chapel. Dr. Barnhart, if I remember correctly. I felt sorry for that kid.

        2. Well nothing could be worse than that. Children who are curious are actually little perverts but mostly little girls. Little girls who are curios will be tagged with the doctrine of the strange women. Only a fundie could come up with that one.

  21. I was humored that he did not mention the abomination of the 135,687 Amish fiction books in the CBD catalog. Surely they are evil?

    1. Seems like half the Christian fiction on the shelves has an Amish or at least Quaker-style woman in a bonnet on the cover. I supposed that’s the most determined way to live a life Separate From The World, but it gives everything rather a boring sameness. Just asking. 😐

    2. I will never understand Fundy women who have a fascination with Amish fiction. I read a few of those books but couldn’t get through the language (Ach, ferhoodled) or the bad writing. Maybe Darrell will do a post on it.

      2. While there hasn’t been an Amish Fiction post per se (as far as I’m aware; I did about a five minute search), there was this post last year: http://www.stufffundieslike.com/2011/02/fundy-fiction/

        (If the link doesn’t work, Google “Fundy Fiction” and “Stuff Fundies Like”. My Internet skillz are more limited than they should be, considering I’m not even 30!)

      1. Okay, now let’s see some Amish vampires, there’s got to be a rich vein (pun intended) of material there. :mrgreen:

        1. …I desperately want to write this story now. A small, secluded community of Amish farmers… with a dark secret! And I dunno, I guess some nice innocent Amish girl moves into town (if that’s how it works) and meets up with the dark mysterious Amish boy who it turns out is secretly a vampire!

        2. Do it write the book. It will be a blockbuster. At which point the rest of us can lol at the crazy crap the fun dies say about some fun fiction.

        3. I think that series would be a guaranteed hit.

          But I’ve heard that the shine is starting to fade on all the teen-romance-vampire stuff. Werewolves are currently in.

          So make it an Amish werewolf story …

        4. A friend of mine put “Amish Vampire fiction” in a suggestion box at a Christian writer’s workshop session on ideas to expand Christian markets. She was only half joking. And everyone loved the joke.

        5. Annie Moose, I think there was an X-files episode along those lines somewhere in season 8 or 9.

        6. And that’s why they’re so dead set against modern farming technology: farming with oxen and driving horses keeps large supplies of fresh blood within reach.

        8. Just discovered there is a book titled Amish Vampires IN SPACE!
          dear God what have i done?

        1. Oh, I don’t know, both of them have exquisite taste, keep to themselves, look perfect in black, and prefer to move only in the best societies. 😎

      4. Oh my but that made me lol. Can the rest of us Christian sinners have Amish/vampires? Just asking?

    4. In the publishing biz, steamy period romance novels are known as “bodice rippers,” and the Amish (Quaker, Mennonite, Brethren, whatever) subgenre is referred to as “bonnet rippers.”

  22. Please tell me someone has picked up on the irony that he hates the system of the Catholic Church because “we (the Catholics) are right and everyone else is wrong…and we have the right to destroy everyone else.”

    Furthermore see the irony of someone who encourages us to check our history, bashes the Catholic church and their system, while at the same time holding in high regard the Holy Scripture.

    Who canonized the 27 books you call the New Testament?
    Anyone?
    Anyone?
    Bueller?

  23. I’ll make a deal with you buddy. You get rid of that facial hair – which deeply offends some of your fellow believers – and I’ll stop purchasing from “wicked Christian catalogs.” I’m tripping over that telephone pole sticking out of your eye.

  24. Best quote of the entire clip at 6:55.

    “And you want to give these people your money? I think some of that stuff will show up at the judgment seat of Christ to be honest with you. Go on, get mad, I don’t care.”

    🙄

    1. I have a hunch that “Go on, get mad, I don’t care” may be an imitation, whether conscious or unconscious, of a Jack Schaap mannerism. Schaap tended to say things similar to that in his sermons. For all I know, he may be saying some of his pet phrases right now to his cell-block neighbors: “Go on, get out your little squirt gun and squirt away.” “No no no no no no no no no NO no.” “I’m gonna slap you, grandma.”

  25. If he boycotts those catalogs for selling non-fundy authors, music, etc., can he not buy anything from Amazon? I hope I don’t have to take that stand. 🙂 I don’t know what I’d do without my Amazon Prime account! I buy everything there!

    1. That’s why boycotts never really make sense. You can’t live in the modern world without spending money that will contribute to the pockets of someone/something you disagree with.

  26. KJV only people are so irritating to me. Codex Sinaiticus was not found in a trash can. Will someone please read a book! Sheesh! ❗

    2. This is one of the standard lies that KJV types like to propagate. Of course, the fact that this isn’t true is irrelevant. Where they found the codex doesn’t change its viability or validity. But logic isn’t exactly a cornerstone of fundy education.

      1. Yeah, why does it matter where someone found it?
        If you find the Hope Diamond in a trash can, it’s still the Hope Diamond, and if someone brings you a horse turd on a silver platter, it’s still a horse turd.

    3. Disclaimer: I am a Reformed Strong-Preference-AV (as opposed to KJVO), but not for the same reasons as the fundies.

      It ammuses me how the fundies cannot see the dichotomy of their KJV position: they say that they (Baptists) did not come out of the Reformation and rail against Reformed doctrine…but boy do they love THE Reformation Bible. They tend to completely ignore the fact that they would never allow any of those translators to set foot in their pulpits. It is no less than duplicity to stand on the shoulders of the Reformers and mock them while using their bible.

      2. I know KJVO folks who laud the translators as extra holy men, so much more educated and holy compared to any translators of any modern Bible versions. But then those same people warned me not to read C. S. Lewis because he was Anglican.

        😯

        I always wondered how they never saw the illogic of their own positions.

      3. One of my favorite arguments from the KJVO crowd is how the ESV is bad because it was translated by Anglicans. I just stare in a bemused fashion and shake my head.

  28. For a dude so set against things that “look like the world” – he sure has gone to the appropriate lengths to ditch his sandals and his robes in place of a nice shirt, watch and tie.

  30. Favorite moment: With a blank, deadly straight face, “I find that very funny.”

    “All this worldly-looking music, you know–doesn’t look any different than the world.” Emphasis added. Oblivious to his own superficiality.

    “They won’t touch this material [Jack Chick, etc.] with a ten-foot pole.” A rational person would pause to think about why someone wouldn’t touch that material.

  31. Holy crap, I was only amused at this idiot until he said, “It’s a historical fact. Look at the Dark Ages.” Now I’m ticked. Anyone who uses the phrase “Dark Ages” in reference to the Early Middle Ages (or especially the medieval period as a whole) doesn’t know what they’re talking about.

    1. I have been learning about the Middle Ages recently so that phrase stuck out to me as well. I believe that you are a medievalist by profession, right?

      Fundies are one of many groups who use history as a bludgeon, not as a source of knowledge. They search through history to find anecdotes that they can use to flail their opponents.

      I truly love history but I have found that many people urging the study of history are agenda-driven baboons. They churn out books not to increase knowledge but rather to prove that their agenda is right. Then, people such as the man in the video read them and feel validated in their beliefs instead of actually learning anything.

      1. Not by profession, not yet, but by training.

        And you’re absolutely right. The defining characteristic of Fundy historiography–if I can profane historiography by compounding it with Fundy–is regarding history is little more than a mine for stuff you can launch against other people. I’ve actually been considering writing a blog post entitled “A Brief History of Everything According to Jack Chick,” and it occurred to me that what Fundies do with history is a perfect example of what postmodernists call “creating a legitimating narrative.”

        I loathe postmodernist history but Fundies fit the definition perfectly–constructing an elaborate, “big picture” version of history that justifies the constructor’s existence and worldview. Obviously such a history is going to be deeply, deeply flawed–or, in the case of Fundies, 90% fictional.

        1. I hadn’t considered the postmodernist aspect of fundy thought. I am sure they would all recoil in horror at being called that!

          Your blog post idea sounds interesting. Fundies view all of human history as a prelude to the Rapture. When the Rapture occurs they will be nearly the only faithful ones left. It is no wonder that they take a self-centered view of history. It would be nearly impossible not to view yourself as the center of human history given their beliefs.

          It is odd to see postmodernism with its aversion to defining truth show up in people who claim to be the only sources for The Truth.

        2. Yeah, Fundamentalism makes for strange bedfellows. Witness the little aside this guy makes in the video regarding the Codex Sinaiticus: something along the lines of “Even the monks knew it was trash!” And now think about in what other circumstances this guy would defer to the opinion of a monk on anything.

          A few years ago, in a considerably smart-alecky mood even for me, I wrote this short version of the Fundy view of history. Enjoy. 😀 http://www.stufffundieslike.com/2009/10/1963/comment-page-1/#comment-2145

        3. “Then everything was hunky-dory for almost two centuries, until the invention of hippies.” 😆 😆

          The man’s deferring to the monks goes back to the earlier point-any bit of history that validates my opinion is good, any bit that contradicts me is suspect.

      2. The proof-texting approach to Bible reading easily carries over into a proof-text approach to history, or, for that matter, science, current events, or anything else.

        The Fundy Bible doesn’t have the words of Christ in red, it has the “clobber verses” in fluorescent orange.

    2. By far the most outrageous and offensive thing in this entire video was when the speaker called the period from AD 476-1054 “The Ages.” There is just no excuse for that. Anyone who would do such a thing is obviously a hateful, narrow minded, ignorant bigot.

    3. By far the most outrageous and offensive thing in this entire video was when the speaker called the period from AD 476-1054 “The Dark Ages.” There is just no excuse for that. Anyone who would do such a thing is obviously a hateful, narrow minded, ignorant bigot.

      1. My point is that, in his effort to use history to cudgel and label about a billion people evil servants to a dark overlord, he’s using obviously phony historical myth. Not only is he a bigot, he’s a historically illiterate bigot. Cf. The Protocols of the Elders of Zion. Bad history matters.

  32. Every Fundy I’ve seen looks like the world – their hair color, their eye color, they have legs, arms, ears, a head, a body, etc. Their clothes look pretty much like the world; I haven’t seen anyone wearing Bible robes except for a skit. I don’t know if someone’s a Fundy when I’m in the store or out to eat! Their houses definitely look like the world from outside; can you tell “Fundy lives here?” if you don’t know them personally? Yet they try to look different from the world. The only way people can tell that is if someone sees them often enough to see that the women wear dresses all the time; the man wears suits to church; they spend all day Sunday at church; – well, you get the idea. Most of the time “The world” – the people they try to show they are so different of – do not pay enough attention to see that they are different! 🙄

    1. I agree. I always wondered why women needed to look so different, but the men did not. How can you tell a Fundie man dressed for church from a non-fundy business professional going to work everyday? You can’t! Do they not understand that non-fundy women wear skirts and dresses? “if women are not to wear that which pertaineth to a man” then why are we allowed to wear shoes or socks, or shirts, or coats, or hats. It doesn’t make any sense.

    2. Beth-
      I beg to differ with you. The “world” is typically found attired in natural fabrics (wool, cotton, leather, etc), while fundies are almost always in some synthetic fabric (rayon, polyester, pleather, etc). I can spot them from a mile away!
      Bro Bluto :mrgreen:

      1. The fundies I know in my area often do wear cottons and cotton blends like everyone else. ‘Course that could be partly due to the hot climate doesn’t go too well with most synthetic fabrics.

  33. What is sad about Funday fanantics is that they HONESTLY think the entire world should believe exactly like they do. They act so surprised when people don’t. If you don’t share their beliefs, then forget you. Pass. You’re not worth my time….. unless that time is spent HATING on you, keeping my kids from hanging out with yours, not shaking your hand during the Meet & Greet hymn, or not inviting you to my Biblical Costume Contest and Candy Giveaway on Halloween.

    Thanks….I never liked you anyway. Your wife says “yes, preacher” too loud in church for my taste.

    2. I was thinking he was the guy who did the video where he goes through Walmart ranting about how Walmart should not sell modern Bible translations.
      Is he?

  36. this guy has a video where he recommends some KJVO singles/dating website and talks about how he put a profile on there.

    looks like no one put a ring on it yet. 🙁

  37. Who even reads catalogs anymore??? Haven’t they heard of this new fangled thingie called ‘the Internets”???

    1. I notice the entire collection of Ruckman Commentaries just above his left should in the frame (our right).

      Yup.

  41. Did anybody else notice the full Ruckman Bible Commentary collection on the book shelf over his left shoulder? That right there says it all. No wonder he is so full of hate and condescension, look who and what he reads.

    If anyone ever wants a good laugh, read the intro to Ruckman’s commentary on the Gospel of John. He goes on for several pages bashing new translations, then goes on to explain why we should correct the Greek with the King James. I showed that book to a linguist with a master’s in Biblical languages and it took her five minutes to stop laughing – then she realized it wasn’t parody.

    1. Correct the original with a translation as the reference?

      That IS a parody, whether Ruckman knows it or not.

  42. How ignorant…

    People like that make my a$$ twitch. He probably still thinks the Earth is flat!

    I just hope that someone doesn’t see this on YouTube that doesn’t have much exposure to religion, and is led to believe that all Christians are like this guy.

    1. Agreed. If you’ve ever wondered why so many people believe that all Christians are half-wits or lunatics, look no farther.

    2. We used to get literature in the mail from some Christian group promoting the “truth” that the Earth really is the center of the universe.

  43. I was amused by the remarks around 6:30 when he said that the “big distributors” wouldn’t touch the stuff you could get from “Dr” Ruckman or from AV1611 (Gail Riplinger)…. perhaps that’s because the “big distributors” know the poor quality of the “scholarship” behind those works!

  44. “It was in the trash– was garbage, even the monks knew that!”

    This strikes me as funny because had the manuscript in question been the writings of Ye Olde Fundy Baptist Person, he would have said

    “It was in the trash– the wicked sinful monks were trying to get rid of the truth!” 🙄

  45. I guess that all the people involved in the Reformation were just Roman Catholic then (read what the reformers say about the sacraments).

  46. Just lookin at this guy before the video started I thought ……Where’s this guys Yamaka??
    He looks just like one of those Ashkenazi Brothers.

    Sorry

  47. You know, if a First Communion card is the most “wicked” thing you ever see, then you will have lived a very, very fortunate life.

      1. Perhaps, but war, genocide, rape, hunger, preventable diseases, and such are not the things that get him so exercised he makes protest videos. He reserves that level of outrage for … other Protestant Christians and their books, CDs, and other paraphernalia.

        1. By this, all men will know you are my disciples: if you stand against the things that don’t matter to anyone else except yourself.

  48. Ok. This is my take. I listened to this guy for about 2 minutes to see if I could stand having him as my pastor. His voice is so boring and his explanations are so lame I wouldn’t send my dog to his church.

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