107 thoughts on “Quotable Quotes”

  1. So near and yet so far…

    If only it had said “Our job is to make FOLLOWING Jesus look good” (although attractive would be a much better word than good, methinks).

  2. I thought a FUNDY thought it was their job to make themself look “gooder” then the other guy?

    1. If it is, defending sex offenders & tax cheats would seem to be a funny means to accomplishing this “goal”.

    1. I think that is just printed on a stationery that looks like marble. It’s shiny because of the glass in the frame that it’s in. Just my guess.

      1. you can see the seam in the marble down the middle of the quote. I think it’s definitely part of the building.

        1. It looks like paper or fabric that’s been folded and unfolded. There are some V-shaped marks that look like the sort of wrinkles you might see in a fabric wallhanging.

    2. haha if you look closely, you can see the reflection of someone taking a picture of it in the glass. i think it’s a framed piece of paper.

  7. Many fundies I have known do make Jesus look good – when I actually started reading Jesus words and looked at what he did, it looked alot better than the stuff that was being done in his name by those around me.

    I say “Amen” to that quote! Lets make it the SFL motto (with a modification)

    “Making Jesus look good by comparing him to fundies since 2008”

    3. I’ll go for that. Gonna write it down and memorize it, and maybe make bookmarks and give them away to my friends. :mrgreen:

  10. Hey Darrell, I would like a doctorate. The church I used to go to, was giving them away like candy, but as luck would have it, no candy for me… 🙁

  11. How can vile sinners in whom nothing good dwells that are lifted out of a horrible pit make a holy God look good? We are simply to let our light shine so others will give Him the glory!
    Man, these people irritate me sometimes!

    1. That’s right. HE’s the light, not us! If we let our light shine before others, it’s showing Him off, not us. Geeze for fundies who always harp on how good for nothing we are, this quote is pretty conceited. 😕

  12. I could not help but laugh. How can you make the perfectly good look more good? This is silly. Is this a suggestion to be bad so God looks more good? I thought that the Bible covered this falacy a long time ago.

      1. Have you listened to a lawyer lately? Rational about dollar signs, but that’s about it.

  14. When did Jesus retain legal counsel? Apparently I didn’t get the memo.

    HEADLINES:

    “JESUS GETS LAWYERED UP! GIBBS FIRM RETAINED TO MAKE HIM LOOK GOOD!”

  16. I thought Gibb’s job was to hold “Legal Seminars” whose chief aim was to scare preachers into spending money for his dubious legal advice and opinions on “church law”.

    That, and to defend fundies at all cost and in spite of guilt or innocence, since the mog is always right.

      1. Why, Uncle Wilver, you can take care of that lack of education stigma today! Email Darrell and you’re just a few clicks away from receiving the Doctorate of your choice. 😎 Then we will all call you Dr. Uncle Wilver… :mrgreen:

  19. Sadly, I went to “bible college” with this pastor’s wife. Even more sadly I have been forced to endure Gibbs’ “preaching” on more than one occasion while attending said “college”. I know many of the people on staff at VFBT and could go into a lot more sad, disgusting details…. but I will refrain. It is a part of my life that still makes me ill and I’d rather try to forget about it.

  20. David Gibbs. Such an ass. Such an arrogant, pompous self-absorbed, self-righteous, money-grubbing ass. There are two people on this planet I actually, honestly hate; he’s one of them.

  21. Does anyone know who gave Gibbs hi doctorate? While trying to find out who “honored” him so, I found this site: http://www.ministers-best-friend.com/Doctor-of-Divinity-Famous-Ministers-with-our-Doctor-of-Divinity-Title-Premise-by-NewtonStein.html

    About 1/3 down the page is an interesting group of D.D. recipients. I think I’ll buy one. Being Dr. UncleWilver is sure to propel my career as an aircraft mechanic. According to these folks, it’s a must have.

    2. If a fundie tries to hide where he got his doctorate, most likely it is an honorary degree from some unaccredited basement bible college.
      The three most popular ways to earn your fundie doctorate.
      1. Unaccredited diploma mill. This might require one to take some classes and write a few papers. (A waste of time of a MOg)
      2. Honorary doctorate from unaccredited basement bible college. It’s a bit incestuous to get it from your own BBC, so give one to your friends who runs his own BBC and he will give one to you.
      3. Fit out lie. It worked for Schofield, the author of god’s favorite reference bible.

    3. If a fundie tries to hide where he got his doctorate, most likely it is an honorary degree from some unaccredited basement bible college.
      The three most popular ways to earn your fundie doctorate.
      1. Unaccredited diploma mill. This might require one to take some classes and write a few papers. (A waste of time of a MOg)
      2. Honorary doctorate from unaccredited basement bible college. It’s a bit incestuous to get it from your own BBC, so give one to your friends who runs his own BBC and he will give one to you.
      3. Flat out lie. It worked for Schofield, the author of god’s favorite reference bible.

    4. Since he is a lawyer, I would assume he has a J.D. You don’t have to have a J.D. to be a practicing attorney in some states, but 95% or more practicing attorneys have one, which fact on its face should tell you something. A J.D. does not require any special project or dissertation, making it the easiest doctor degree to receive.

      1. That’s not to say he doesn’t have an honorary doctorate from somewhere. I would assume he could fill a wall with those he receives from the various branches of Fundy U. He probably gets at least one every year.

        Also, no lawyer that I have ever heard of ever goes by the title “Doctor” except in an educational setting.

      2. As I said in my comment (below, but prior to this one), a J.D. is not really the equivalent of most earned doctorates, and people with a J.D. rarely call themselves “Doctor” and are almost never addressed as “Doctor” by others.

    5. This is the most amazingly horrible web sites I’ve ever seen, and that was before I actually read it. It’s painful to look at. It’s an affront to literacy. These people owe the quotation mark an apology for blatant abuse. Wonder where these people got their degrees? Their claims about some of these ministers is also rather dubious. They claimed Tabernacle Baptist Church was the “unofficial church of Bob Jones University.” When we went there in the 80’s, hardly any BJU students went there. TBBC was more into promoting their own “college” and justifying the abuse within their own empire.

      1. ^^^ Yes. The never-ending hamster wheel of works righteousness sanctification. Being an upstanding Fundy is so exhausting.

        Jesus said His load is easy and His burden is light. Fundies fail to comprehend this truth. It is always about them, not Jesus.

  24. Why of course we need to make Jesus look good! Forget that passage in Isaiah about Christ having no beauty or majesty to attract us to him (paraphrased from NLT). Being Fundy is all about appearances, after all. If it looks or sounds good, then it IS good. And since only God is good, anything perceived as good has to come from Him, amen?
    👿 😕

    What a bass-ackwards quote. It turns man into god and puts Jesus in need of a makeover. 🙁

    1. Baha yes please!

      I kinda did that once. I found a GIANT sign under our church’s staircase one day: said “100% Neal” and was signed by academy/college students. (even though quite a few are now gone hehehe)I printed up a sheet that said GOD in giant letters, and underneath put the “it’s better to put trust in the Lord than put confidence in man” verse, and stuck it over the “Neal” part.

      It was gone next time I went by 😛

  26. The red flaggs are all over my brain–horrors!
    But it did remind me of a sermon I once heard at fundy church: “What Christ didn’t say” Wrong, just plain wrong.
    I agree with Apathetic.

  27. This conversation reminds me of my favorite Sara Groves song, You Are the Sun:

    You are the sun
    Shining down on everyone;
    Light of the world,
    Giving light to everything I see;
    Beauty so brilliant
    I can hardly take it in;
    And everywhere you are is warmth and light.

    I am the moon with no light of my own —
    Still you have made me to shine;
    And as I glow in this cold, dark night,
    I know I can’t be a light
    Unless I turn my face to you.

  28. Sigh. The sad truth is that the folks like this do just the opposite: make Christianity and by association Jesus, look mean-spirited, hypocritical, and downright unhappy.

  29. What a weak, pathetic god it is that needs us to make him look good.

    Only a false god of someone’s imagination needs us for anything.

    2. Good point, Don. I can’t believe that this quote would even be said (ok, yes i can, by him), let alone hung up on display.

  30. I think Jesus is doing just fine like he is. He doesn’t need my help to make him look better. I need his help. What a sorry excuse for a human being and a professing Christian David Gibbs, Jr. is. I’m embarrassed.

    As far as the doctorate, doesn’t a lawyer actually own a dr. degree legitimately? Maybe it’s not honorary although I’m sure some fundamentalist church or school has no doubt bestowed that “honor” on him somewhere down the line.

    1. Jesus needs Dr. Dave’s help to make him look good. Dr. Dave’s Religious Cosmetic Spa and Law Office can do wonders for your appearance.

    2. Most lawyers in the U.S. (including my wife and many of our friends) have a “Juris Doctor” (J.D.) degree. While the word “doctor” is in the name, few attorneys who have only this qualification go around calling themselves “Doctor.” (They would do so at the expense of being laughed at by their fellow lawyers and judges.)

      A J.D. is an advanced degree usually involving three years of study but no dissertation requirement. Therefore, it’s closer to a Master’s dgree in many other fields than to a PhD or an MD. (Law graduates also have to pass bar exams to get a law license, but that’s not a requirement for a J.D. degree.)

      There is such a thing as a PhD in law (some universities call it by other names), which requires a lot more academic work than a J.D., and the relatively few lawyers who have that degree are completely entitled to be called “Doctor.”

      Then there is LL.D (Legum Doctor or Doctor of Laws), which at many schools is a purely honorary degree. As we often have occasion to observe here, it’s rather pompous to call yourself “Doctor So-And-So” based on an honorary degree.

      1. Didn’t “Dr.” Hand at Bob Jones University assume that title only by virtue of his J.D. degree? And I believe that arrogant, pompous jerk was laughed at for doing so.

  33. What a heavy burden and unattainable goal they place on themselves. As for me, grace and I are becoming close friends, having been introduced by Christ.

  34. How does bragging from a pulpit, in front of 1500-2000 people, about gorging on 1-2 dozen Krispy Kreme donuts on the way to the airport make Jesus look good? 👿

    How does telling stories from the pulpit, where he casts himself as the hero, make Jesus look good? (example: the story where he lands a small aircraft in Alaska after the pilot became incapacitated – with only radio assistance from air traffic control.) 👿

    How does being told about Bob Gray’s pedophilia long before the police arrested him – while not making an effort to protect children from him – make Jesus look good? 👿 Gray was shipped off to Germany as a missionary to get him out of Florida… Many fundy churches, including mine, financially supported this pedophile on the mission field. Yuck.

    How does asking the court to not allow Chuck Phelps’ counseling notes, which contain the perp’s admission to being the aggressor in a child rape case, make Jesus look good? 👿

    How does using highly emotional pleas (very manipulative, IMHO) for donations for his buddy’s annual church building program make Jesus look good? 👿

    Jesus looks good – always. No thanks at all to Gibbs, but in spite of him.

    1. exactly,my old church supports him, too, and I was shocked to hear about his counsel to Trinity Baptist in Jacksonville. We visited that church end of the nineties, and Messer was preaching on…..you guessed it, sexual purity. 🙁

      1. It is a travesty that Tom Messer is still the pastor at Trinity! How can people accept the way he and David Gibbs handled the Bob Gray pedophilia situation? This just goes to show that the mannogid can get away with almost anything as long as he keeps serving up the Kool-Aid. 👿

        If Gibbs had any conscience at all he would not be able to look himself in the mirror.

    2. For anyone who wants more info on the Bob Gray Trinity Baptist Church / Tom Messer / David Gibbs pedophilia situation, here are some links:

      http://www.fundamentalforums.com/144506-post19.html

      http://www.fundamentalforums.com/97959-post7.html

      http://www.fundamentalforums.com/139952-post86.html

      Quote from third link:

      “And for the record it wasn’t thirty years for my girls, more like 20 when we first talked with the Pastor and Willinger. We got in touch with the Church because I really trusted them to do the right thing, I mean after all they “are Christians” and have taught us over the years right from wrong! They sent Gibb’s II and Gibb’s III, a retired detective and some lady to our house over 5 hours away. We thought it was a good thing and they were on our side, after all this man molested my daughters! They( Messer & Lillinger) admitted to me and my husband they knew about what Gray had done but retired him and sent him to Germany for the “sake of the Church and the Cause of Christ”. I was so upset I told Willinger he had NO RIGHT to take a criminal matter into his own hands….it wasn’t just a “sin” he could ask forgiveness for.”
      👿 👿 👿 👿

  35. I at first thought that the quote might be a twist on the Bible command not to bring reproach upon the name of Christ, but when I went looking, I found that there was no such command (at least, not in those words).

    Our purpose (job?) is to bring honor and glory to the Lord God Almighty, Maker of heaven and earth.

    Jesus Himself said that the most important commandment was to love the Lord our God with all our heart, strength and mind.

  37. Umm, heLLO! There is a sexy Jesus competition in Delores “Beach,” San Francisco, every year, and I’m pretty sure those guys don’t need any help (ok maybe a couple).

  39. Wow. I’m not sure if it’s an exactly accurate use of the term but my first thought when I read this was, “What blasphemy.” Horrible.

    1. That’s an exactly correct use of the term. In fact, “Our job is to make Jesus look good” is a rather glaring example of blasphemy.

  42. Wow. That’s . . . not how that works, Gibbsy.
    Haha, I just realised I actually got preached at quite a bit by this guy back when I went to ACE International Student Conventions. Shook his hand and everything.

  43. Well I followed the link to the church and had a look around the website. It’s a more professional website than we’re used to seeing around here, but I did find a spelling mistake within the first few minutes, so I felt right at home.

    I noticed that everybody was welcome in the family of Valley Forge Baptist, “You may find yourself sitting next to the teller from your bank, a local high school teacher, a CEO, or a stay- at-home mom.” It seems that the homeless or underprivileged need not apply.

    As a mother, I felt it important to find out how welcoming they were of families, and found this gem: “Just inside of our Main Entrance you will find the Welcome Booth which is just a few steps from our nurseries. There is always someone available to assist you and your child with finding your way to the class that is right for them.” And then just below that, “The children and youth of Valley Forge Baptist are priority number one so you can rest easy knowing they are in a safe and loving environment. For those of you with infants please bring your children into our Nursery just off of our main foyer. Children from the ages of 2 through K5 have their classes in the Lower Level below the Auditorium. Grades 1 through 6 have their classes in our Educational Wing .” Notice the space before the full-stop there. So, apparently my children are not allowed to stay with me. I’m to entrust them to the care of total strangers, with a stranger’s assurance that they’ll be in a “safe and loving environment”.

    It’s a good thing there are no issues of child safety within the IFB, really.

    Finally, I was pleased to see if I had any concerns I could just call the church’s office during their open hours, on the number 610.948.8100. Actually, that point made me a little sad, really. I thought all American phone numbers started with 555? TV just won’t be the same anymore. 🙁

    1. Oh, how could I totally miss the huge, front-page ad for “Dave Ramsay’s Financial Peace Seminar” – Just $100 per person or couple. Who doesn’t need financial peace? I need financial peace! I’ll take three tickets!

      1. One way to improve your finances is to put $100 toward paying your bills instead of blowing it on a seminar.

Comments are closed.