Websites

FWOTW: applebybaptistchurch.com

330 Comments

This week’s website is the home of Appleby Baptist Church in Nacogdoches, TX and it hits all the fundy high notes in style. Don’t miss the Christ-honoring sermons with titles like “When He is a whoremonger- When she is a whore” and “400 Years ago and the KJ Bible is still so.” (Still so what we might never know but I’m sure it’s lovely.)

Also don’t miss the standard Church Covenant, blatant copyright violations on their music page, and gospel-filled articles with titles like “Interracial Marriages in Light of the Scriptures” and “Baptist Preachers and N—–r Jokes.”

You just can’t make this stuff up.

330 thoughts on “FWOTW: applebybaptistchurch.com”

  5. We engage, therefore, by the aid of the Holy Spirit to walk together in Christian love; to strive for the advancement of this church, in knowledge, holiness, and comfort: to promote it’s prosperity and spirituality; to sustain it’s worship, ordinances, discipline, and doctrines; to contribute cheerfully and regularly to the support of the ministry, the expenses of the church, the relief of the poor, and the spread of the gospel through all nations.

    O RLY? 😯

    And by the way, I was also shocked that they managed to have a consistent design that – while it wouldn’t win any awards – wasn’t a total eyesore. I mean, it’s really not that good, but in comparison to most of the FWOTWs, it could be at least Web 1.8…

    1. “We further engage to watch over one another in brotherly love; to remember one another in prayer; to aid one another in sickness and distress; to cultivate Christian sympathy in feeling and Christian courtesy in speech; to be slow to take offense, but always ready for reconciliation and mindful of the rules of our Savior to secure it without delay.”

      Yes, because using the term N****r, calling Beth Moore a whore, and spewing enough hate in his articles to fill a cesspool is exactly what I was thinking of when I read the terms “brotherly love”, “Christian sympathy”, and “Christian courtesy”. Welcome to First Baptist Church of Hate. 😡

      1. This is a PERFECT illustration of all the “idealist” propaganda that Independent Baptists say they hold to. All the people that flood this site and say “WE PREACH LOVE! SEE? OUR CHURCH IS NOTHING LIKE THE OTHERS!!!!” Yet, in the same website they’re spewing hate and their superiority to everyone else but those who hold their beliefs. 🙄

        1. I want to know what “chunking” is? Wouldn’t that be “chucking”? 🙄 He’s so intelligent.

      4. This is a verbatim copy of my church covenant! Except I do not remember the “relief of the poor” or whatever. I haven’t even seen the website yet, I’ll probably wait until tonight as I don’t want to get that feeling in my tummy even though just seeing the words from my church covenant is already causing the feeling. 🙁

  6. I’ll have to take the time later on to read over some of those articles. But the titles alone were quite offensive. 👿

    1. I wouldn’t do that if I were you…trust me. 👿 I just read three of them (yes I barely stomached that garbage) and they are vile and putrid! I can’t believe I used to listen to that stuff when I was in the IFB!

      His only justification for using the “N” word for blacks is that they are “Hamites” and “he ain’t backin of that!”

      I also noticed the “Love your preacher” sermon. Figures they couldn’t leave that one out. 🙄 👿

      1. No of course not! And it wasn’t preached by him but by someone else, who I will assume is his assistant pastor. Funny how the assistants, every time they get a chance to preach will preach about loving the pastor. Trying to suck up much? Thinking he may replace you someday with his son or son in law and you’re trying to secure your position? Or maybe just get good brownie points with him? 😈

  7. Tulip sniffing! I gotta read these articles. I would never have pegged a site like this as the standard fundy-psycho page- no blinking lights, not thomas kincaid-esque clip art… good find.

  8. I can’t believe there are blockheads like Dennis Anderson who still try to use the Bible to condone racism. In the 21st century.

    Maybe one of us should write a review of this church on Google Maps.

        2. Better yet, put him of the mailing list of GLAAD & the NAACP. And maybe a Victoria’s Secret Catolog. (Just leave off the church name so the organization or vendor will believe it is a residential address.

          Dennis Anderson
          14010 N US Hwy 59
          Nacogdoches, TX 75964

        3. Is there any way this church could be nominated as a hate group with the Southern Law and Poverty group? (I’ve forgotten the full name; if someone could fill that in…?)

    2. Great idea. But that will only contribute to their persecution complex and that only they have the truth and are being mocked and ridiculed for it.

    2. I think it SHOULD stand for “Funy Weirdos On The Web”…that’s my story and I’m sticking to it! :mrgreen:

    3. I think it SHOULD stand for “Fundy Weirdos On The Web”…that’s my story and I’m sticking to it! :mrgreen:

  12. Notice the “Love Your Pastor” sermon given by someone else. The most cultish and abusive sermons are contracted out to others. It allows the MOG to issue a disclaimer when confronted, but the MOG will never counter the cultish and abusive sermons, especially from the pulpit.

    1. I couldn’t get that one to open. But thank God I was able to read that Easter egg hunts are directly linked to teen pregnancy while my sons are still young enough to be hunting eggs instead of fertilizing them or heaven knows what might have happened in a few years! I feel like we’ve all been saved from a fate worse than death! 😛

      1. “Yes sir, the egg was pushed to shore and right into the Church. This fable pagan goddess of love has made its way into the Church of the Living God, and we have the unwed pregnant girls in our land to prove it.”

        So, apparently, people’s making/hunting/etc. easter eggs is the ONLY reason there are “unwed pregnant girls in our land.” This is a discovery of which the National Institutes of Health should be informed post-haste! 🙄

    2. Like h*ll he didn’t! I’ll bet he told them just what to preach on! Later he’ll say he didn’t tell him to preach that but it’s a lie. It happens too often to be a mere coincidence! 👿

  13. I tried to open the “Pastors and N-word jokes” and Explorer gave me the message “The file is damaged and cannot be opened”.

    Wisdom from my web browser.

    1. They are just PDF files, so most likely there is a PDF issue with IE (but your comment was pretty funny).

      Actually, the “Preachers & N**** Jokes” was condemning other preachers for sitting around telling N**** jokes, but not preaching against inter-racial marriage

      1. GR – You need to re-read that article. And I quote:

        “If an interracial couple wants to come to our assembly they will need to know I will not be silent about the their UNscriptual union…”

        The only difference between this guy and the KKK is that he does not wear a hood.

        1. Also: there was no condemnation of those telling racist jokes for telling the racist jokes. It was for their hypocrisy in telling racist jokes and then not delivering his racist message from the pulpit. I’m sure he’s fully consistent and also tells racist jokes in private…

        2. Yes, I know that he believes interracial marriages are “unholy” (he’s wrong).

          I don’t want to wander in that sewage again, but I thought he said he didn’t tell n**** jokes, but he based those who did and didn’t preach against interracial marriages.

        3. “The only difference between this guy and the KKK is that he does not wear a hood.”

          I wouldn’t be so sure of that….

        4. Oh what joy to be sitting there and have the preacher point you out and say your marriage is unscriptural! And they’d be expecting your tithe in the plate. In your dreams! I’d be out of there so fast! And I’d be writing a letter to the editor of the local newspaper to tell them what a racist jerk was pastoring a church in “Christian love” of course! 👿

        5. Not many things would make me walk out during a sermon, but overt expressions of racial hatred would do it.

  15. The things you are liable,
    To read in the Bible,
    Ain’t necessarily so.
    -Gershwin

    (unless it’s KJV, apparently)

    1. Unnecessary KJV translation (but it was fun coming up with it):
      “The things which thou art liable,
      to peruse in thine own Bible,
      are not necessarily as such.”

  16. So much hate just a mouse click away.

    Even the fundy craziness I was exposed didn’t promote racism.

  17. I am sincerely glad that I didn’t grow up in this brand, or I probably would be completely atheistic by now.

    As it is, I just reject much of what I was taught but not the Bible and Christianity alltogether.

    2. Me too. My former IFB churches may have had a lot of faults, but racism wasn’t one of them. This is disgusting.

      1. Same here, but my fundy church was in Michigan not Texas. I didn’t think Texas was still racist, and it probably isn’t, but this guy is. Still my church in Michigan had no blacks and only a few Hispanics. 🙂

        1. There is a geographical difference (said the Texan). My wife grew up in an Indiana fundy church, and they have many inter-racial and non-white families. No one seems to notice. Then again, no one notices the anti-Biblical theology either, so maybe they just haven’t figured it out yet.

        2. Now I’m embarrassed for my state. 😳
          Let me just say you would hear nothing like this (N-word, “Hamites,” bashing interracial marriages, and so on) in the vast majority of Texas churches. You would hear lots of bad theology, and (unfortunately) a fair amount of homophobia, but those who are openly racist, white supremacist, separatist, or whatever you want to call it are a very small minority.

    3. The church I grew up in actually had an inter-racial couple. No one in the church seemed to have a problem with it, but I remember my mom commenting on it once. 🙄

  18. While the vast majority of the ariticles on this website made me gasp out loud, I do have to say I agree with his article on Faith Promise – when he goes on a tyrade about holidays, I kind of shut down, but his explainations of why FP is unbiblical I agree with. Coming from a place that practiced guilt and manipulation during the missions conference just so the preacher could brag to his fellowship buddies about how much the church gives to missions every year… that stuff makes me sick to my stomach.

    1. Now the article on interracial marriage is horrifying…. It makes me want to cry at how disgustingly racist those people are. So sad…

      1. I agree — and this may be a rare occurrence of the proper word of “racist” – he apparently believes that all blacks are inherently inferior because they are under the curse of God.

        I especially laughed at the statement that when the Bible says Abraham’s wife was “very fair to look upon” that it means she was white, and the black Egyptians coveted the white woman. Does he not know what “fair to look upon” means?

        2. Um…black Egyptians? High class Egyptian women were quite pale skinned. Other classes had darker skin due to the sun, but Egyptians are definitely not vary dark unless you are calling them black because they are in Africa?

        3. The people living in Egypt now range all the way from quite white-skinned to very black-skinned (and every shade in between). There’s actually some debate (among people who think it matters) about how light or dark the skin of the ancient Egyptians was, and about whether or not they should be classified as Caucasians.
          In ancient Egyptian art, women were generally protrayed with lighter skin, and men with darker sking. But this was probably an artistic convention rather than a physiological fact. I don’t know of any race of people where all the men have darker skin than any of the women.

  19. apparently he can’t type

    “Special thanks to Kathy King, April Anderson, Julie Rice and Lorie Self for their help in typing
    the articles.  May the Lord recompense their work and labor of love for His Word”

    (found at the end of the interracial marriage article)

    Are we to surmise that he spent considerable amounts of time with these women, waxing eloquent, his ethnic homily? Did they swoon in as he “spake” (AV1611) the scriptural truth to them? Are they his KJV bitches? For shame, for shame.

  20. I’m curious if anyone can tell me, from the “About Us” section, who Lord June is, and where the town of 1994 is.

    I’m thinking of using this site as an English test for my son. My high school English teacher would empty a pen of all of the red ink correcting the grammar and punctuation errors.

    I scanned some of the articles. Good thing I haven’t eaten yet, I might have lost my breakfast. I have a 1611 replica, Old Scofield,Thompson Chain Reference, and regular 1769 KJV. I can’t find any of his drivel in them. It’s either the NKJV, ESV, NASB, NIV influence, or maybe that I have read the whole Book and learned early on that context is somewhat important. I wonder what he’s going to do when he finds out Heaven is integrated.

    1. “(Thanks to all our Church Proof Readers who help me to make necessary corrections so the
      articles are more readable.)”

      This was at the end of the interracial marriage article. So many punch lines, so little space…

      1. Possibly not. He may find out hell is though. I think God takes a dim view of his racism. 😡

    4. Not sure if I am qualified (Bam! Qualified) to speak on behalf of liberal minded, sissy, silk panty wearing people everywhere, but let me just say that I don’t have a problem with him and others like him calling people names and doing it loudly. It makes it much easier to identify them from a distance so I can cross to another street to get where I’m going.

    5. You can write to the author is you have any questions or a wish to send a lovely gay pride postcard from San Francisco.

      Philip Stowe Jr
      PO BOX 11
      Martinsville, TX 75958

      1. Man, I was just in San Francisco last month, and I didn’t think to pick up any Gay Pride postcards! What a wasted opportunity!
        I’ll just have to send him a telepathic message instead.

  22. I have to admit, most of my brief dealings with IFB churches and pastors would put them in the category of “mostly harmless,” in that they are tiny churches with pastors who pretty much are pastors because they couldn’t get any other paying job, with men who truly love the Lord but just don’t know how to go about it. I’ve only met a couple I would put in the same category with this guy—that category being “insane.” Someone please burn his tie.

    This guy in unbelievable. I love the all-bold, underlined text for emphasis, and the different font for the italics sections. Apparently the women in his church earn their rewards by typing—albeit quite poorly—for their pastor. I sure hope they weren’t wearing pants when they did it.

    This guy should not be let anywhere near a computer, let alone a flock. Why do all these fundy sites look like they’ve been typed by someone who’s using a style guide from the 1940s?

    How truly oppressive would it be to sit under all that hate every week? I had to browse his article on interracial marriage just to see what he had to say. I couldn’t get past the first couple of paragraphs before my blood pressure started going up but I did read inane things like “lust is color-blind” and “God is a divider.” I just can’t even go there. How absolutely revolting. I don’t know how these guys sleep at night.

    More now than ever, my tulip-sniffing soul wishes I knew how to hack websites so I could fill his with edifying, loving articles and good music. (What WAS that, by the way? Sounded like a possum going a round with a raccoon!) But his head would probably implode.

  23. Oh my word, oh my word. bybaptistchurch.com/Articles/B.P.&%20Nigger%20Js..pdf

    This should be offensive at any time period, but look at the date 2010. Holy crap! Oh and guess what he is all fired up about, still in 2010, interracial marriage. Racist alert!

  25. Oh my! Welcome to the dark ages. As a parent of 2 bi-racial adopted children I can’t believe he calls himself a Christ follower. The sad thing is my Baptist preacher grandpa used to believe that crap.

    Wonder what he will do when he stands infront of Christ as realizes he has brown skin? I hope the his “mansion” is right next door to the ethiopian eunuch. Martin Luther King, and Harriet Tubman. He might actually think he is in hell!

    1. Since this guy behaves as though he’d think the KKK is a good thing, I wonder if he knows his Saviour is a Jew. Hmmm. 😕

      1. Perhaps he follows the “Christian Identity” movement, which claims that Jesus was not a Jew.

        Not making that up: If you want an explanation, ask them, not me.

  26. This may very well qualify the Reverend for a Doctorate in Fundy Stupidity degree (FSD for short):

    “Science recognizes three classes as Mongoloid –Jew,Caucasian–Gentiles and Negroid–Ham.  All other races come from crossbreeding 
    between these three, as well as a mixture of 
    crossbreeds among themselves.”

    From which science does this gem proceed? Asshology would be my guess!

    1. Sounds like the ‘science’ is at least fifty years out of date – and I speak as a clergyman with a science degree from Liverpool University, so I actually know something about real science. The sort of racial ‘science’ referred to was what lay behind segregation and Nazism.

  27. “I’m trying to offend as many infidels as possible” — Achmed, The Dead Terrorist

    Sorry, but that was what came to mind. 😉

  28. “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give cgrace to those who hear.” – Eph 4:29.

    Could you not feel the grace? Could you not feel yourself being built up as you read his article?

  29. From the Tulip-Sniffers article:

    “If you want a real treat attend one of these Tulip Sniffers conferences. The host pastor takes
    the place of the Holy Spirit by assigning a subject for his guest speakers.”

    Sermon prep… of the devil.

  30. When I first saw the title, I read it as Apple by Baptistchurch.com.

    I guess he is still stuck in racism and hasn’t moved on to attack teh gays.

  31. “But didn’t Jesus turn the water into wine? Don’t be STUPID. Every drunk in the country MISUSES those same passages to justify drinking. Under the Old Testament economy there were three main offerings, a BURNT OFFERING for sin, a MEAT (meal) OFFERING for fellowship with God, because sin had been atoned for, and a DRINK OFFERING of the strongest liquor content to be POURED OUT before the LORD. It was NOT to be swallowed, but POURED OUT” (from article on teenage drinking).

    I have to confess that I have never heard that particular piece of drivel before. It’s “never mind John’s Gospel, look over here in the Old Testament! Shiny thing!”

    If you can’t actually deal with the objection but have to say “don’t be stupid, look over here in the Old Testament…”, then you, sir, are a knave.

    Also, note that alcohol abuse is confused with the drinking of alcohol, a statement that I like to answer by claiming that the twit has just insulted my mother.

    1. Yes! Yes! This article would have made me laugh out loud had it been a parody…but some fool wrote this in all seriousness! Now this part did make me laugh…

      “Liquor will rob you of your BRAINS. It will make you behold strange women and utter perverse things. It will put you in DANGER that you will be UNAWARE of. It will leave you DUMB…Liquor will DAMN YOUR SOUL TO HELL”

      Priceless…

      1. I see why Mr. Anderson is worried about Drinking, for plainly he has none to spare. Or use, for that matter.

      2. “It will make you behold strange women.”

        Was he referring to beer goggles, perhaps? 😀

      3. If it leaves you dumb, how can you utter perverse things?

        And how can you read the story of the wedding at Canna and come away thinking that the guests were not drinking wine?

  32. ” Liquor was never given as a beverage or social drink in the Bible” Says who? So apparently the wedding at Cana doesn’t involve the drinking of wine? Thank you, Mr. Anderson, we are all wiser for your asinine drivel. :mrgreen:

    1. As a very wise preacher once said:

      “Don’t be STUPID. Every drunk in the country MISUSES those same passages to justify drinking.” 🙄

    2. My old pastor specifically taught that that was non-alcoholic wine that Jesus made in Cana. The bible passage itself specifically excludes it however, remember the head of the feast explaining that most people bring out the good wine at the start, and the cheap at the end – when the guests were already drunk so they didn’t care what they were drinking as long as it had alcohol in it. But Jesus made the best wine at the end.

      The passage that they used to support this wacked up version of Jesus’ first miracle was some passage in the old testament that said that it was a sin to give alcohol to another. The pastor said that it would have been sin for Jesus to make alcohol, and Jesus was sinless, so he didn’t do it.

      Which I guess means that the KJV was translated wrongly and imperfect but nobody ever suggested that…

      1. The verse is Hab.2:15: “Woe unto him that gives his neighbor drink, that presses your wineskin to him, and makes him drunk also, that you may look on his nakedness!” Like many people do when proof-texting, they were deliberately shortening the verse and not looking at it in context. The verse is prohibiting getting someone drunk for your perverse pleasure, not simply giving them a drink, because Prov. 31:6 says, “Give strong drink unto him that is ready to perish, and wine unto those that be of heavy hearts.”

        1. Nicely done. And thank you. I long fell prey to that misuse of the Hab. passage. Never knew (or looked up) the context. Thanks for supplying it.

        2. yup, that’s the passage my dad always uses. yes, present tense. and he says the whole thing about alcohol being sin and Jesus was sinless so he couldn’t have made alcoholic wine. therefore, it must’ve been grape juice.

        3. If you only read part of a sentence, there’s no telling what you might think it means.

          Reading the whole chapter? That’s for silk-pantied liberals.

    3. “Liquor was never given as a beverage or social drink in the Bible”
      Even if this was true, who cares? The Bible also never says “you can only do things that you observe in the Bible.” So, can I have 900 wives like Solomon? Maybe rape the hired help like Abraham or kill a bunch of Canaanites or something. Maybe I’ll kill 1,000 Philistines with this guy’s jawbone…

  33. I like the title: “The Perfect Picture Show or the Preverted Picture Show”. Not sure what ‘preverted’ means, though. 😆

    2. I was kind of hoping this one was going to have something to do with Dr. Frank N. Furter. Sadly, it did not.

  34. I’m always interested in seeing pictures of women from these places. While I have no problem with what they’re wearing, I’m surprised the church allowed these women to have their pictures taken and put up on the website; one younger female has very apparent cleavage.

    I also like (and by like, I mean I’m completely offended) the title of the “article” on the Cowboy Church Movement. Loud mouth women, haha.

    1. How come I can’t find the pictures?

      I have to inspect the cleavage pics and rebuke them if they do not meet biblical criteria. :mrgreen:

        1. Maybe it’s my browser at work but I am still not seeing pictures or links to pictures. I will try looking at home.
          Important work like this cannot wait. Cleavages must be inspected.

        2. Scorpio, here you go: http://www.applebybaptistchurch.com/Staff.html

          For some reason that link only shows up when you click on the Deaf Church link, which in turn only shows up while on the Home page. Their page may be lacking in animated images and eye-paralyzing colors, but they still can’t get their links to work correctly. =P

        3. MrsSarah – Thank you. I have completed my cleavage inspection. I think they all pass fundy muster. The best (or worst) I could see was maybe 2-3 fingers worth of cleavage.

          But I do have a question along the same lines…..Do any of the piano players even need their hands to make a joyful noise? :mrgreen:
          I guess everything is bigger in Texas.

  35. ‘Tulip Sniffers’ article. Pure ad hominem, not once does he actually refer to something people are really doing. ” This crowd of men spends more time in the beauty parlor than they do in the Bible”. Really? Since when? I happen to be a Calvinistic minister, and I have never been to a beauty parlour in my life. I have friends who are Calvinistic ministers who have never been to such places. One is a retired army officer who has seen combat. Hey, I was at a Calvinist seminary with a former mercenary! Now, I’d like Mr. Anderson to repeat his screed to that bloke! Let’s see, huge ex-merc who could kill a man in fifteen different ways… Somehow I don’t think that Pastor Anderson would call him a sissy.

    1. Wow. He started the article bashing non-KJV-only people and ended it bashing interracial marriage. I’m not sure what those two have in common. He would lead up to a point and then never support it. It reminded me of a toddler thowing a temper tantrum…all emotion and no logic. Only my toddlers were better behaved!

  37. this man is an idiot! however if they are all so holy it seems that the pictures of some of their lady singers…they had some pretty low necklines! they are going to cause some mog to stumble : )

    1. Relax, disgusted, our Scorpio has already inspected the said clevages and they passed fundy muster. 😎

  38. “Science recognizes three classes as Mongoloid – Jew, Caucasian – Gentiles and Negroid – Ham. All other races come from crossbreeding between these three, as well as a mixture of crossbreeds among themselves.”

    He writes an article to tell us what crossbreeding leads to. If you want to know what inbreeding leads to, you can just visit his church.

  39. You wonder if these men who rant about women wearing trousers have ever stopped to consider that what is regarded as appropriate male or female apparel is culturally determined. In the first century the only people you would find wearing trousers were the ‘barbarians’, and then both men and women. In the Ancient Near East both men and women ordinarily wore long robes, though of different designs, and men often wore kilts. An examination of the relevant sources in my library has failed to find any ANE figure wearing trousers. To this day there are cultures where men do not wear trousers, but long robes. Is Pastor Anderson going to call a Bedouin effeminate? Because if he is, he had better have good medical assistance standing by, and hope the Bedouin in question does not have an AK-47.

    Incidentally, does he think that a Highlander in a kilt is committing sin? But according to traditional Highland apparel, women wore long skirts, only men wore the kilt, so the kilt is that which pertaineth to a man, and it is women wearing kilts who would then be breaking the law.

    Apparently he has failed to notice that we are not under law but under grace.

    1. Apparently he has failed to notice that we are not under law but under grace.

      It’s what all fundies fail to notice. It’s practically the definition of fundy.

    2. In the late Roman Empire, the wearing of trousers by men was banned, because it was a “barbarian” style.

  40. 4 of the singers are known as the Anderson sisters; his daughters perhaps? And the message of the Bible is ‘Turn or Burn.’ God as cosmic sadist.

    1. Would it be considered evil or bad if we prayed, wished and/or hoped that one of his daughters runs away with, marries and has children with a black man?

    2. But they all have different last names. Does this mean they are all married, or they mean they are the pastor’s sisters? =\ If the latter, I find that disturbing.

      1. I’m going to go with married daughters, who apparently never left the church. Growing church the old-fashioned way.

        1. Given the small number of people in the pictures of the congregation in the pews, I’m guessing that this church’s membership consists mostly of the pastor’s family.

          That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but it’s noteworthy.

  41. Since when were Egyptians black? Hopefully we all now know what Egyptians look like, and they are olive-skinned, not black. So why does ‘Pastor’ Anderson use Pharaoh’s attraction to Sarah as an example of black men being attracted to white women? In a related point, Joseph, son of Jacob, could pass for an Egyptian (the differences between an ancient Egyptian and a Jew were mostly in terms of dress and hairstyle).

    “Oh what a tangled web we weave
    When first we practice to deceive.”

    1. In the backwater that I grew up in, white people with tans were viewed with suspicion. He probably does think Egyptians are black. I realize that I am playing pretty fast and loose by using the word “think” in relation to this clown.

  42. I’m waiting for a Fundy to come on here and denounce this guy and tout his own amazing love-filled church. It shouldn’t take long…

    2. Scroll on down to the 230’s and you will see Jay’s post with a link to a Kevin Bauder sermon…

  43. Typical fundy hypocrite preacher. This in their artical of faith; to avoid all tattling, backbiting, and excessive anger; Isn’t this along the line of gossiping too? What does not apply to the man-0-gawd?

    The fools’ articals are nothing but tattling, backbiting and excessive anger and lets not fotget gossiping too.

  44. Oh, and the ancient inhabitants of Canaan were not black, as copious pieces of evidence demonstrate. Hittites were Semitic, we have artwork.

    The modern concept of ‘race’ is just that, modern, it is the product of the enlightenment. Skin colour was far less important that one’s allegiance in the ancient world (and for the Jews particularly religious allegiance). Nationality was a matter of where you were born, not what you looked like. This is blatant anachronism of a particularly unpleasant kind.

    NO reputable archaeologist thinks that the ancient Canaanites were black, but Pastor Anderson does. What a nasty piece of work he sounds!

      1. For the ancients, the tribe was the defining unit of identity. Secondarily, there was a vague concept of nationality tied mostly to language: You spoke Greek, Hebrew, Phrygian, or whatever. Rather late in the classical period, the Romans developed a concept of citizenship as a political, rather than tribal, identity.

  45. “abstain from the sale of, and use of, intoxicating drinks as a beverage”

    I can do that. Of course, there’s no prohibition to buy them. And I need to drink my “medicine.” It’s not a beverage then.

    1. The term “intoxicating drinks as a beverage” is the language right out of the prohibition laws. Welcome to 1922.

  46. The inhabitants of Canaan were Semitic tribes. I know of no scholar who thinks otherwise, I have a groaning shelf of books on Biblical background, but ‘Pastor’ Anderson has a pet theory, and so every scholar must be wrong. Well, I’m sure Mr. Anderson learned it from someone else, but the passing on of erroneous information does not make it true.

    Also, Bathsheba was Jewish, not ‘Hamite’. The fact that her husband was a Hittite does not mean that she was. The fellow’s level of Biblical ignorance is truly horrifying!

    I note he skips over the whole book of Ruth. But she was a Moabite. Yet the whole book is about her getting married to an Israelite. It certainly looks like God approved of that. And King David finally came from that ‘mixed marriage’. There are two Canaanites in the genealogy of Jesus given in Luke. And I might go on, and on, and on.

    1. “Semitic” is a linguistic definition, not a racial one as we think of race. A Semite is anyone whose native language belongs to the Semitic family of languages (now considered part of the Afro-Asiatic language family). Hebrew, Aramaic, and Arabic are a few examples of Semitic languages.

      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Afroasiatic_languages
      http://www.krysstal.com/langfams_afroasia.html
      http://www.britannica.com/EBchecked/topic/8488/Afro-Asiatic-languages

  48. The building looks deeply depressing, and I write as a seminary-trained man, which means that guess what I did on Sundays when I was training in London? Yes, and I have seen some really bad examples of architecture.

  49. Per Wikipedia (knower of all things) the racial makeup of Nacogdoches, TX is 65.98% White, 25.06% African American, 1.13% Asian, 0.34% Native American, 0.11% Pacific Islander, 5.84% from other races, and 1.55% from two or more races.

    In other words one out of every four people in his town isn’t welcome in his church. Jesus must be so happy.

    2. The only thing I know about Nacogdoches is that it’s where this happens in Cormac McCarthy’s Blood Meridian:

      [A man named Reverend Green has been holding a long series of tent revivals in the town. A man called the Judge arrives during one. He] pushed his way forward as far as the crateboard pulpit where the reverend stood and there he turned to address the reverend’s congregation. His face was serene and strangely childlike. His hands were small. He held them out.

      Ladies and gentlemen I feel it my duty to inform you that the man holding this revival is an imposter. He holds no papers of divinity from any institution recognized or improvised. He is altogether devoid of the least qualification to the office he has usurped and has only committed to memory a few passages from the good book for the purpose of lending to his fraudulent sermons some faint flavor of the piety he despises. In truth, the gentleman standing here before you posing as a minister of the Lord is not only totally illiterate but is also wanted by the law in the states of Tennessee, Kentucky, Mississippi, and Arkansas.

      Oh God, cried the reverend. Lies, lies! He began reading feverishly from his opened bible.

      On a variety of charges the most recent of which involved a girl of eleven years–I said eleven–who had come to him in trust and whom he was surprised in the act of violating while actually clothed in the livery of his God.

      A moan swept through the crowd. A lady sank to her knees.

      This is him, cried the reverend, sobbing. This is him. The devil. Here he stands.

      Let’s hang the turd, called an ugly thug from the gallery to the rear.

      Not three weeks before this he was run out of Fort Smith Arkansas for having congress with a goat. Yes lady, that is what I said. Goat.

      Why damn my eyes if I wont shoot the son of a bitch, said a man rising at the far side of the tent, and drawing a pistol from his boot he leveled it and fired.

      [The protagonist leaves the meeting as it descends into chaos and goes to a saloon. Later, the Judge comes in and someone asks him about the incident.]

      Judge, how did you come to have the goods on that no-account?

      Goods? said the judge.

      When was you in Fort Smith?

      Fort Smith?

      Where did you know him to know all that stuff on him?

      You mean the Reverend Green?

      Yessir. I reckon you was in Fort Smith fore ye come out here.

      I was never in Fort Smith in my life. Doubt that he was.

      They looked from one to the other.

      Well where was it you run up on him?

      I never laid eyes on the man before today. Never even heard of him.

      He raised his glass and drank.

      There was as strange silence in the room. The men looked like mud effigies. Finally someone began to laugh. Then another. Soon they were all laughing together. Someone bought the judge a drink.

    3. Nacogdoches is near the Lousiana border, and may have more in common with Lousiana than with most of Texas.
      Incidentally, by some reckonings, Nacogdoches is the oldest town in Texas.

      Those of us from other parts of the state tend to think of the region we call East Texas (which includes Nacogdoches) as the most– how shall I say it?– backwoods, or rustic, part of the state. I’ll just quote here what a friend who grew up in East Texas said: “They still haven’t told them the slaves are freed there.” When you hear about Texans doing some very backward or benighted thing, very often (but not always), it happened not too far from Nacogdoches.

  50. I haven’t made it past the first line in the ‘About Us’ section.

    “Our church was established by the leadership of the Lord June of 1994.”

    Yeah, but OUR church was established by the leadership of the Lord May of 1989….so you’ve just been PWND Sucka!

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