124 thoughts on “College Promo Videos: The Crown College Edition”

  6. Ha! I graduated from that place. Now lets never speak of it again… nightmares. 😥

    3. I was there for a semester and then I went to England for a semester. In 2009-2010.

    1. Jordan, thanks for posting this! I laughed and laughed. Ironically, my husband graduated from Iowa State.

      1. In a strange coincidence, the first person I ever watched this short with had either a parent or cousin who went to “the high school after high school.” 😀

    1. Yes excellent! I would argue there might not be any other place like an IFB college that you could make the statement “look at all that khaki”!

    1. Apparently, I have a problem.

      Also, my wife is out of town and I have time on my hands.

        4. @ Don – I just swallowed a chicken nugget whole after reading that…. :mrgreen: You’re so funny!

      2. That would have really given a whole new meaning to “Time Lord” and the Timey-whimey stuff. Don’t know if I would have ever been able to watch the Doctor the same way after that. 😯

  12. Wait! At 1:47 there’s a female wearing GASP! jeans!! Granted, they are pale-colored Mom jeans. But, they’re jeans!!

    1. I’m surprised the daughter of that worldly mom dared bring her along at all. But you know, sometimes we have to be lights and good examples to our parents! 😉 Maybe being in the crowd of skirts and female godliness convicted her of her carnality!!

    1. Lol….quick glance reading your post and I thought it read morons… 😆

  14. Lovely mockumentary. There were so few people of color there, it could have been in Utah.

  15. Hey, I didn’t see any big red noses, grease paint, big orange hair, size 55 red shoes or a car where 23 people got out. What kind of Clown College is this! There was no one falling down, being slapped with a smelly trout, or squirted with water by any of those flowers. The only thing that came close to being funny was the pulpit shot where the pulpiteer was not wearing a tie… I would demand my money back and get myself down to Florida to a real Clown College. 😯

  18. Oh that made me laugh so hard. I wasn’t expecting that. Well done Darrell.

    FYI it took me 3 passes to see the black guy in the shot of the choir.

  19. Dude! I think the girl in the purple shirt at 4:21 is the one of the daughters of the pastor of my parent’s church. Pretty sure that’s where she went to school.

  20. Wow! That was hilarious. Thanks i needed a laugh.
    “More white people.” Sad but true.
    Now for a request: please do an Ambassador Baptist College version. I believe they have a promo video on Youtube.

  21. I will say this… Crown College looks like it’s in a nice area. But this video looked as though it was an advert for the Stepford wives..

  22. Darrell, you have made me so happy today 😀 Bless you and your infinite sarcasm!!! :mrgreen: I has lolz

  23. you need to do one of these on Lancaster and Golden State, heck all of the small-we-think-the-big-three-are-too-liberal-so-we-made-our-own-college’s!

    oddly enough, i was just thinking about how Maranatha does not have all the weird stories like BJ, PCC, et all.

  24. my favorite part was the “field trip” to the aquarium in busses. . .”just like in middle school” LOL.

    1. I was thinking “just like in elementary school” but middle school works 🙂

    2. Guess I’ll have to watch the video to see if there were separate vehicles for males & females…you, know, so there can’t be any “fraternization” (holding hands—-eeeeeek!) 😯

  26. This video makes me glad I ended up at the Bob. If I had listened to what my parents ultimately wanted for me, I would have ended up at Crown, because it was the closest thing to the Tennessee Temple that they remembered from their college years. Scream.

  27. I love how parents talked for the girls who looked pained to be there. Lulz.

  29. Waaa, My parents are sending my sister to find a husband there this fall.

    Being from PCC, I was still suprised to see all the parents like these college students weren’t grown up yet. We didn’t have any parents standing in line with us or registering with us. Good grief, that’s embarassing. And big yellow buses for a COLLEGE feild trip. That’s got to be embarassing.

  32. Parents helping kids register. For college. Yikes! And the one student who did speak for herself–was she really college age? I thought she was one of the mothers!

  33. I saw my old dorm. Wow! The memories came flooding back. I am not sure I am happy about that. 😡

    My old dorm crammed eight guys into a room that could have comfortably held 2-3 at most. It was uncomfortable to say the least. On the bright side I got to be treated like a child for four years, pay thousands of dollars and get a degree that puts me in direct competition with high-school dropouts and illegal immigrants for employment! 😆

    1. Actually, I think they’re one-up on you, because they don’t have any college loans to pay off! 🙄

  34. I’ve heard of Crown but never seen anything about it. One building? How many students attend there? BJU was bad, but at least you felt like you were on a campus. Can’t imagine going to college at a place with one building that looks like a fancy rest stop.

  36. As I look at the rules and culture of my own IFB college experence it makes me glad it’s all over!

    Yes, at a Christian college you need rules but sooner or later you have to start trusting people. You have to start treating them like adults. That is the best way to see if they can handle it. Some would say “Without strict rules and supervision these kids will go right into sin” but somehow I doubt that will happen on the scale they say it would.

    IFB colleges are a lot like car dealerships. When you call them they say “Come on down. We’ll get you in a car. We’ll get you financing. No problem!” And then sometimes we get in over our head. When you call a Bible college they say “Come on down. God will provide. There are plenty of good jobs in the area. You don’t have enough money for your school bill? Don’t worry. God will provide.” But the road leading out of Bible college is littered with people who said “God will provide.” He does, but faith is not coming up with our own plan, shoving it in God’s face and saying “Bless it!”

    Perhaps Bible colleges should be more selective about who they want in; only allowing those who REALLY want a life of ministry as opposed to those who are just thinking about it or just want one year of Bible college. (BTW, in my time at WCBC I noticed that the “one year of Bible college” students were treated like second-class citizens.) Then, be very open and honest about the cost, including an estimate of the “hidden costs” (stuff you need just to live), and then tell them that if they decide to not pursue a life of ministry the degree they have will not help them in the real world and they will have to start the college process all over again. Yes, we will have fewer students but we will also have students who are passionate about serving in ministry and who know up front what their degree is good for.

    And, while at Bible college, stress to them that just because they want to be preachers does not mean they are better than the people they are to serve.

    2. Very well said, Jason!

      Having come from WCBC myself, I agree on many of your points. While I think the One Year Bible program is a great way for more secular job-minded kids to come in and get grounded in their doctrine before persuing whatever career God has for em, the college (ahem…a certain Dean of Men in particular…) needs to treat them with far more respect and dignity.

      And don’t even get me STARTED on the freaking HORRID dorm life rules…. 11 o’clock lights out, locked down…for adults? Really??? Drove me bat@#$% insane that did, being someone who does his best work at night. Seriously, I was home one night on break, watching a show about prisons, and I was like…”Hey, that’s EXACTLY how it is at school!” Not to mention EVERY FREAKING NIGHT “devos” of some sort, which, depending upon your dorm supervisor, boiled down to some guy bloviating for an hour or so. Grr…

      /end rant.

    3. faith is not coming up with our own plan, shoving it in God’s face and saying “Bless it!”

      This may be the most brilliant thing I’ve read all day.

  37. Wow, I knew at least 4 of the people in this video form the family “interviews” they did … 😯 And I never went to Crown or anything like that. Small world!

  38. I haven’t read any comments yet but I must say that that was the funniest thing I have ever seen (my jaws are hurting a little from all the smiling). Made me forget about crap for a little while.

    Darrell, I love you man! *sniff* (wipes nose on sleeve) seriously, I love you….

  39. As a person who was never fundy and went to a secular, slightly liberal women’s college, the idea of parents registering their adult children for college (and speaking for them on camera!) is just astonishing. It’s so opposite of what the rest of the universe considers a COLLEGE experience!

    1. I’m at a women’s college! 😀 there are more of us out there! Mine is associated with the United Methodist Church, but it is liberal. That gives me the freedom to be as liberal or conservative as I choose and still be respected; and I treat others the same. I don’t think, sadly, that Crown would appreciate me…

  41. “Look, there’s white people! Very, VERY white people! Oh look, a black guy! Quick!”

    Not a whole lot of diversity…

    I went to camp there with my youth group. We had lots of fun, except for the culottes… the girls stayed in the green building. Good memories! Now my best friend from high school and church goes there.

  42. On a more serious note, are they so entirely out of touch that they don’t realize how very much this video makes them look like a CULT? I mean, they are a cult, but you would think they would try to hide that or something…

  43. Darrell, please do one of these for the “Learn, Live, Grow” video for PCC.

  44. The idea of parents registering their kids for college is just plain sad. I mean, these “kids” are ADULTS! They are more than capable of registering, and doing everything else, themselves! I did all that by myself just fine and you know what? It wasn’t even difficult

  45. Welp, seeing this, at least our latest college video from WCBC had actual students speaking for themselves (even though the speakers were all pretty much the favorite people, but hey, favoritism is just something you expect there…and a lot of places really).

    /end rant numero dos…

  47. And you’ll be a home ec major…and you…Yup, home ec…You can be a nurse…just kidding…HOME EC!

    Ya hit the nail on the head.

  48. Laughed my head off! I think mom didn’t stop trying to speak for me until I was married! What is with parents doing that.

  49. The one building comment caused me to research this place using my favorite satelite image browser.

    Yes, it is one building, with one dome, and one skylight. The church is about 4/10 mile away and the Ladies’ barracks are about 3/10 mile from the church. The layout of the church property suggests that the Ladies’ barracks are church property.

    I’m not sure where the mens’ barracks are but it looks like they are about 100ft from the church.

    Cool! about 1/4 north of the church someone build a corn maze. “Life down on the farm” 2010 FOX43 .

    1. Mt. Moriah is a few miles from the church. that’s where most of the boy’s dorms are, up on a hill in a bunch of mobile homes. UGH! the memories of that place!!

  50. Was the building appropriated from an old outlet mall, because it looks exactly like one near me. I never went to a fundy school, and now work at a godless liberal state university, so if Darrell weren’t narrating this would seem more like a horror film!

    1. it was an the old Levi’s plant. they purchased it, poured a butt load of money into it to make it look fancy. Clarence (the pastor of Temple and the president of Crown) likes to look expensive.

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