Books

Jack Schaap: Insane Heretical Book Edition

142 Comments

Psalm 119:30 says, ‘I have chosen the way of truth: thy judgments have I laid before me.’ That word laid is a sexual term which literally means the same thing as a man laying with a woman. God was saying that God’s laws should be as intimate as a marriage partner in a sexual liason.

In the next verse, David gets more graphic. ‘I have stuck unto thy testimonies: O LORD, put me not to shame.’ That word stuck means ‘the act of a man entering his wife’; it is sexual intercourse. God says that the Word of God should be the Christian’s lover, and nothing should be closer to him than the Bible. The Words of God are supposed to be the most intimate lover of his life.”

– Dr. Jack Schaap, “Marriage: The Divine Intimacy“, p. 50.

This book is so bad that even his fellow fundies can’t deal with it…

You think Jack Schaap maybe has a few sexual hangups? Just throwing that out there as a possibility.

142 thoughts on “Jack Schaap: Insane Heretical Book Edition”

  1. Why do even so-called “good” fundamentalists even acknowledge Schaap’s existence. The man’s an empty suit.

    1. For all the sniping, and anger in fundy land that bully pulpit still holds a lot of power, and with it the jealousy, and power issues that come with.

    2. In my “neck of the woods” I don’t know of any IFB churches that consider Schaap to be anything other than a nut at best and a heretic art worst.

      Most think the latter, and I agree.

      And one of the Churches used to be a HA church and it still has a HA grad as Pastor (Who now sports a beard and doesn’t preach against pants)!

  2. This isn’t even fun to make fun of. What do you say to a man who tells you that he imagines he is making love to his Bible as he reads it?

    Answer: Stop that!! ๐Ÿ˜›

  3. Second thought: Who spends an entire church service reading aloud from a Jack Schaap book. That dude needs to get a life and a sermon.

  4. You should have been there to here some of his ‘Lord’s Supper’ introductions…

    1. When people say they’re having the Lord’s supper, I feel like I should be bringing a covered dish. I prefer to celebrate the Eucharist which gives me a real sense of what’s actually transpiring. ๐Ÿ™„

      1. Okay…as a faithful reader here, I feel left out every time you reference George. What am I missing?

        1. I’m sure there’s more to the backstory, but from what I’ve picked up on, whenever Don has typos, he blames “George.” ๐Ÿ™‚

        2. yeah, george helps me with my typing and replys sometimes… he can’t spell worth beans but he’s been with me since back in the day, when we doubled dated Ursula and Fella. (I never could tell them apart but they could stay in step and were great dancers) ๐Ÿ˜€

    1. Schaap is perverted for sure.

      This is based on his own words (shudder)

      ๐Ÿ˜ก
      It is sad when the lowest common denominator ruins it for everyone else.

  7. I don’t ever want to borrow Jack’s bible – half the pages are probably stuck together. ๐Ÿ˜ฏ

    3. Ewwwwwwwwwww….but probably true. I won’t be a bit surprised if some really ugly skeleton comes out of that closet.

        1. Guess I called that one…Of course, any reasonable person could tell he was a perv from that book – and that horrible youth conference video from 2010.

    5. WELL Played! When I see his Bible w/ the worn backing and the stained pages, I think there’s a man that LOVES his Bible! ๐Ÿ™‚

      Apologies, but I had to do it.

      1. Yeah, he probably cheated on the KJV with the ESV. And contracted NIV. ๐Ÿ˜ฏ :mrgreen: ๐Ÿ˜†

  9. I heard something similar about about sins being hereditary from a Gothard seminar. That, and not his misuse of scripture, made me dump everything like this in the trash.

    Between my four grandparents and their various spouses there were 15 marriages. It wasn’t easy to hide because I got quizzed a lot about my family. When I heard this theology I realized why certain people had nagged me about it. ๐Ÿ˜ฏ

    I knew that this would make me a second class citizen no matter what my own actions were, so I left.

    1. Which, IIRC, is why they’re so negative about being adoptive/foster parents. No telling what demons that non-Gothard kid could drag into your house. {sarcasm mode off}.
      Wanker. (and yes I mean that in ALL meaning of the word) :mrgreen:

  11. Cover art: its like an Iron Maiden album cover has ungodly relations with an Ann Murry album cover.

  13. And why do I get the feeling that this fundy preacher picking apart Jack Schaaps book is actually ENJOYING it. Like it was a great opportunity to talk about sex again! Because Lordy knows an evangelical wouldn’t even CONSIDER preaching about it…let alone quoting it from the platform.

    Yikes. The whole thing makes me sick!

    1. as a kid in a fundy church, I knew more about sex than my secular friends just from the prayer meeting sermons. It made me cringe.

    2. Actually, my evangelical pastor was preaching through I Corinthians, and he said that next week he would preach “a rousing” sermon on sexual relations. Many people in the congregation were upset because they thought he said he would preach “an arousing” sermon” on sexual relations.

      Many of us were absolutely dying laughing.

      1. LOL! And right. An Evangelical pastor would talk about sex–just not about a Jack Schaap book like this. They typically have enough discernment to know “quack” when they see it. They don’t need to tell people about it. It would kind of be like preaching a sermon about, “Why David Koresh’s take on Scripture was wrong.” You know what I mean? It’s like: “Well, DUH! Of course it is! Who needs a sermon on it?”

        1. This is a kid I went to college with at HAC. His dad is Tom Neal and this is one of his son’s named Greg Neal. Back in the 90’s Tom Neal was the biggest Hyles worshipper there was on planet earth. When Hyles died and Schaap was crowned king things started to fracture. If Hyles were not taking a dirt nap, Tom and Greg Neal would still be kissing his big toe…It is all quite comical to me.

          Matthew Richards

    3. Actually no; I have been in the speaker’s church for over two years now: I have never heard him talk about sex, even in college chapel.

      Yes he is very fundy, but he’s not so narrow-minded as most. I look forward to Sunday morning sermons when he preaches. (The Sunday/Wednesday night not so much….)

  14. Ok, so I did a word search on eSword to see if he had any basis for this. The word “laid” had ABSOLUTELY no sexual connotation in ANY of the passages where it was used. Seriously, H7337 is not used for sexual motifs… As for the word “cleave,” it used in some passages to mean “being very close to” and it denotes an emotional closeness, even between a man or a woman, but not necessarily sexual.

    “To the pure all things are pure, BUT…” ๐Ÿ˜ˆ ๐Ÿ˜ฏ

  16. And how am I responsible for the genes of family members? I had no say in what they did! ๐Ÿ˜ฏ

    1. Oh yes you did! You were “in their loins.” Better confess it quick, ’cause your teenaged son is getting ready to have some impure thoughts any second now! ๐Ÿ™„

      1. If you father’s brother’s, nephew’s second cousin’s grandfather’s cousin twice removed commited sexual sin, there unclean spirits in your life and you must ask God for forgiveness.

        1. It’s not only the IFB that talks about that. In the church that I go to(I’m still there because I don’t have a car yet..and my mom needs someone there who won’t push her around)had things called encounter retreats.

          On the first day(you got there at night) of the retreat, you had to fill out a sin survey listing all of your sins and the sins of your relatives(Grandparents, Great Grand Parents, and Parents). By the time I was done with mine, I was so freaked out that I tried to talk to a fellow person there about it.

          Apparently we couldn’t talk negatively about it there. The weird thing is that this was going on in the youth church(the age limit stopped at 26 but could be extended by approval of the youth pastor)but not going on in the adult(like..parents..)encounter retreats.

          Long story short. The thing that burned me was being told that my being sexually abused opened a door to demonic forces and if I didn’t forgive my molestor that they would throw me head long into hell.
          I was naive and possibly too sheltered. I thought they knew what they were talking about. Apparently they didn’t.

        2. ” The thing that burned me was being told that my being sexually abused opened a door to demonic forces and if I didnรขโ‚ฌโ„ขt forgive my molestor that they would throw me head long into hell.”

          I guess I can see where they get this, but they are in collusion with the abusers, whether they realize it or not. I almost never say this to anyone, but Monica, please get out of that church as fast as you can.

  17. I never thought I would see the day where a preacher would imply that someone was backslidden for not being sexually aroused from reading the Bible

    1. Actually, that would be Greg Neal, Brent’s younger brother. I don’t think Brent would give that the time of day.

      Also, I love the fundies stacked up behind him. The guy on the left is clueless, the guy right behind him is still in high school, and the guy on the right doesn’t even pastor that church anymore. :mrgreen:

      One thing I know to be true: you wanna find a “skeleton” in a fundy preacher’s closet? Look first at the one who is screaming about someone else’s “skeletons” all piously.

      Jus’ sayin is all. ๐Ÿ˜Ž

      1. All I know is that it was one of the kneeling Neals. So that was Tom Neal on the right? How do you know all this about them?

        1. I don’t see Tom Neal on the platform anywhere…..
          But his son is the one quoting the book. I’ve always wondered why they praise Jack Hyles to the sky but don’t recommend the church/college.

        2. “I’ve always wonderd why they praise Jack Hyles to the sky,but don’t reccomend his college”

          two words: Jack Schaap

        3. No, that is Mark Turner on the right. I know all of this about them because I know them, and was like them once upon a time.

          Thankfully I have “come out from among them” and am happily enjoying my separation.

          That being said, the book being examined is utter crap too. It’s raining crazies in fundyland.

      2. I go to their church -_- Well Tom Neal’s, and his son is the co-pastor. And I do enjoy his son’s sermons better because he actually preaches from more than one verse…..

    1. I used the last of it, sorry. I still felt dirty after 4 uses and had to finish it off w/ the 5th wash.

  21. The sins of the ancestors thing is scary–makes me glad I come from a long line of celibates! ๐Ÿ˜‰

    I loved watching the nervous tells of the guys on the stage during the “sermon.”

  23. I looked up these two verses in a couple of different translations:

    30 I have chosen the way of truth;
    I have set my heart on your laws.
    31 I hold fast to your statutes, O LORD;
    do not let me be put to shame. (NIV)

    and
    30 I have chosen the way of truth and faithfulness; Your ordinances have I set before me.
    31 I cleave to Your testimonies; O Lord, put me not to shame! (AMP)

    Obviously there’s nothing sexual going on here. I looked up the words in Hebrew, too, and found nothing beyond the usual meaning. This guy is a total quack.

    1. His whole case is based on (unlikely, but barely possible) double meanings of certain words in the English text, while ignoring (and hoping you won’t notice) that you can’t get those meanings from the original Hebrew.

      That’s why some of these nuts insist you have to use the King James Version. You can’t get the same misunderstandings out of other translations. (You can get misunderstandings, but not the same ones.)

  24. The twisted nature of Schaapรขโ‚ฌโ„ขs mind reminds me of someone. Something about drawing everything back to sex because youรขโ‚ฌโ„ขre perverted. Now who was thatรขโ‚ฌยฆ ah yes, Sigmund Freud.

    1. Based on Haggard, Long, etc etc ad nauseum….the way to know what skeletons are hanging in a preacher’s closet is just to listen to what they preach against.

  25. The problem is, Mr. Freud had a method to his maddness: he wanted to be famous. Mr. Schaap on the other hand is following in his dearly departed father-in-law who had serious sexual issues more than likely from the modeling set at home by his “daddy”. Can you imagine sitting in the congregation that evening listening to this stuff? S’ppose he got any “amens”?

  26. A little off topic but……have fundamentalists banned hot dog eating? I’m out of the loop.

    1. I attended Midwestern Baptist College (Tom Malone’s school) and one of the rules was that if girls wanted to eat a bananna, they had to cut it up and eat it out of a bowl. True story.

      2. They would have conniptions about a female eating a frozen, chocolate-dipped banana on a stick at the fair then hungh?

        (here in the south, in the rural IFB especially, it is a “stoning offense” if the female is caucasian having one of those in public) ๐Ÿ˜ฏ

      4. Even if she’s on the pill/banana control? Does that also stop the spread of banana transmitted diseases? I suspect there’s no such thing as safe banana consumption.

      5. Banana eating was banned at BJU when my daughter was attending. Boys went to the dean’s office and complained that when girls ate bananas they had impure thoughts. We lived in town and she packed a banana several times a week for her lunch. This was no small inconvenience for us. Not sure what the current status of that rule is.

        1. In a related story, Fundy U has petitioned the local zoo to cut up bananas before feeding them to the chimpanzees, lest the fundy boys have any impure thoughts about the chimps. Film at 11.

        2. WHAT!? The guys had the problem and the girls got punished? It’s not the girls’ fault if the boys have that kind of filthy mind. It’s freakin’ FOOD, not anything truly raunchy.

        3. I’m just musing on the Fundy boys having impure thoughts about chimpanzees. That’s just… ๐Ÿ˜ฏ

      6. Only girls? Boys could eat whole bananas?
        How could you be kinky enough to think that eating bananas is dirty but naive enough to think that every boy is heterosexual? Or that girls don’t have “impure” thoughts?

    2. Yeah, hotdogs are still ok, just make sure your buns can handle the whole weiner, and it’s not hanging out on either end. ๐Ÿ˜ฏ

  27. Hmmmmm a dash of KJVonlyism a dash of reading in a modern slang into an archaic version of english, and you get this. Shakes head, nah beats head against wall. Oh no I wrote beat and head, bad mbi bad mbi. ๐Ÿ˜€

    1. That’s OK, mbi. You’re forgiven. Just remember the next time you order chicken to order white meat and not “b—t”. ๐Ÿ˜ณ

  29. Anachronistic use of “laid” – firestorm of criticism.
    Anachronistic use of “wine” – not so much.

    Sorry, had to bring that up. ๐Ÿ˜€

  30. I’m a graduate level student of Biblical Greek and Hebrew. This guy has no idea what he’s talking about, but that’s no real surprise. FYI (and I mean this politely), you can’t really “look up” the Hebrew word, because the interpretation is often dependent upon the form of the verb (qal, pual, hithpael, etc.), which is why this Strong’s numbering thing can be misleading at times. Anyway, in this case, both words are piel verbs, which denotes intensive action of “cling” and “set”…but not sexual intercourse. But we all know that even without a Hebrew grammar and lexicon.

      1. Biblical Hebrew is Ancient Hebrew. Biblical Greek is one form of Ancient Greek…Or rather, one dialect of it.

        Joshua, I don’t know about you, but I am never going to be able to read any verses with Shavah of dabaq in them the same way again. >_> <_<

        1. I know what you mean, Luna. Now I’m ruined forever on this guy. The last thing I want to think about is Schaap as I’m doing…anything.

          Luna is also correct on the “Ancient” thing. Greek has many forms in antiquity, including Ionic, Attic, Koine (the kind in the NT), Septuagintal, and others. Greek has changed in part due to conquest from outside nations; this is noticed in how Modern Greek varies from the kinds I listed due to hundreds of years of Turkish occupation. Hebrew has changed some too, but I don’t think it’s as drastic as Greek.

        2. Just out of curiosity, what exactly are you studying? Is your degree in “biblical languages” or are you biblical studies in general? Or preparing for ministry? Or Hebrew Bible, but have to know greek? or New testament but have to know hebrew??

          …i ask because my ma will be in critical comparative Scriptures which is as yet a non-existent field in most of academia (with the exception of my school)…So I need to figure out what I’m going to do a Ph.D in so that I will be employ-able.

    2. Well, the easiest thing to do is just check where he studied for ministry…Pillsbury for a year and then Hyles Anderson. I wouldn’t trust anything he said about any of the original languages.

      Matthew Richards

  31. When I was a teenager, we were attending the annual church “Fall Party” and playing a mystery/question game with about 150 people, all sitting in a circle. Pastor was heading up the games, a task that he felt was something he *only* should be doing.

    At the end, he triumphantly said to us (and there were about 150 of us in the circle) that the mystery winners should “stand up and expose themselves!!”

    Fortunately, my friend and I weren’t winners, so we didn’t have to stand up. We stayed crumpled over double in our folding chairs, failing at repressing our laughter and trying not to make eye contact with any other savvy young “fellows or gals.”

    One thing about fundamentalist naivetรƒยฉ: it does make for some really interesting situations.

    1. I hate youth group and party games. SOOO Much. I just wanna play Race for the Galaxy. Or Puerto Rico. Or even Settlers of Catan. But NOOOOO, always had to play some game like Duck Duck Goose or Murderwinks (yeah, with adults). Luckily, when I did get some of the guys to play a few Eurogames with me, they loved them. But I never went back to that camp. Oh well.

      1. You know, it can’t be something as simple as chatting with some great food..no, it has to be something meant to the surface a bunch of fake emotional happiness…(Duck Duck Goose and the like)you know, have “fun”. Kids like to talk…give’em good food and pipe in some GOOD music and they will talk your ear off.

    2. At my former fundy church, a teen social following the Sunday evening service was called an “afterglow.” Um, sorry, Pastor, but the sermon wasn’t quite THAT exciting.

  32. I think there are a lot of fundies who are held up on some sort of sexual thing. I always thought that Tony Miller has something going on. I mean I understand that he is dean of men, but seriously everything came down to sex for him…and always seemed like he enjoyed those chapels too much.

    But I do think Schaap is taking it to a whole new absurd and disgusting level.

    1. Yea, I always thought Miller was kind of strange, but then again, who on that facult wasn’t? BTW, Miller is no longer dean of men, he’s pastoring an IFB “BoJo” church in Greenville.

    2. Guys that got sent to the dean’s office said that the first thing that Miller asked them was if they had a problem with masturbation. Some guys in the dorm were betting on whether someone would ever have the stones to say…”No, no problems for me. I am quite proficient.”

      1. I know someone who once responded to some church rhetoric about “practicing homosexuals” by saying, “I’m good enough at it now that I don’t have to practice much any more.”

    3. I was there before Miller, but I understand many people thought of him as “Masturbation Miller.” Very few people actually said that out loud, though. ๐Ÿ˜ˆ

  33. Oh my gosh O_O I know him, he’s the co-pastor at my church.

    Well at least he knows crap when he reads it…..

    1. Well, according to some of the people on Rapture Ready, yes. There can be an awful lot of fantasizing about the ‘bridal chamber’ and being taken to Jesus’ arms. I won’t tell you what certain disrespectful heathens say about the constant refrain of ‘Come, Lord Jesus!’.

  36. Of course we have to remember no good Christian should use the words laid or stuck. Why someone might overhear you and your testimony would be ruined.

  37. Schaap is a sick, sick, sick freak with a twisted mind. Only a sycophantic fool would look up to and follow this pervert. His last name should be รขโ‚ฌล“Offรขโ‚ฌย.

  38. I suspect everyone in the street heard me laughting for about20 minutes when I read the thing. The chap definitely needs counselling. Or being locked in a dark room for a very long time, up to his neck in iced water. Or iced tea.

  39. This is disgusting. I can’t believe someone would twist the Bible in such a perveted way. ESPECIALLY the “sexual sins of previous generations”??? Thats not in my Bible! BUT then again, I have a ESV so I am a heretic in their eyes already.

  40. The link to amazon says there are 2 used paperbacks for $1,485. For that price, they should ship this trash for free.

  41. Does Schaap cite an authorities for this or does he speak from personal knowledge of Greek and Hebrew?

    1. I think Darrell nailed it: He speaks from being totally, howling-at-the-moon, tinfoil-hat-wearing, 200% insane.

  42. Jack Schaap said he could be turned on by a cartoon mouse. With that perverted mind, why would Schaap not want to make love to his Bible!?!?! ๐Ÿ™„

  43. The dude breaking down the book in a Neal. There papa had a big fundy man crush on Hyles back in the day.

    So little Neal was trying to get his followers to hate the new leadership at FBC.
    Probably so they will worship him and have no other man-gods besides their pastor.

    Sad thing is this little Neal is having money issues.
    Same record for these guys over and over.

  45. Blesssss heaven I don’t want nutt’n to do with those comprising preachers that wear jeans in the pulpit and spike there little metro-sexual hair cuts!!!! They use there wicked versions and pervsions and got bongo drums on the stage. It’s Satan I tell you!

    Don’t bother me with your mammby pamby exegesis stuff. I don’t want know systematic theology wickedness.
    Give me men like HYLES SCHAAP and HUTSON! Those men can make the bible say anything there church needs. AMEN PREEEEEACHER

    1. I hadn’t seen that, but just labeling it an apology doesn’t make it an apology. He “apologizes” for all the people that aren’t able to understand him, and not for his own perversion. It’s not OK to read 18th century language into 20th century slang on that “receive” and say “I was just making an analogy for the intimacy of the Lord’s Supper”. BS. He’s a perv, and blaming everyone else (by apologizing for your misunderstanding”) is the same old crap he’s been shoveling for his whole life.

      1. Early 17th-century language, I’m sure you mean.
        And he’s the one who misunderstands it, not the rest of the world.

        1. I say 18th century cause I’ve never seen a actual 1611, and don’t know what differences there are, but I know that “receive” he perverts is definitely in the KJV I have in my car, so am assuming that’s the KJV he’s filthing up.

      2. By no means was I defending him Rob. A sermon is not enough of an apology. If he really wanted to apologize he would have done it publicly in one of his churches publications,corrected it in the book itself, or done it on Youtube.

        1. I was concurring I assumed you were on the same page when you said he characterized it as a misunderstanding (blaming the hearer). Was just stating that it’s typical HAC. Call it an apology while you don’t apologize.

        4. Rats George, I thougt I stopped the mispelled comment from posting,but you got me anyway.

          Request to delete please.

  47. Now Greg Neal has more to worry about then Jack Schaap. He is known as the peeping pastor on YouTube.

  48. Most “Fundies” have no use for Hyles / Anderson. Jack Hyles never repented of his long-term illicit relationship with his tape copier. His son Dave was even worse, and some bus captains and others sexually abused children.
    Now we hear FBC’s rep state on the youtube tape of their announcement re. Schaap boffing a 16-year old that they are “shocked” by his “fall.”
    People, this was no “fall.” Schaap has been one sick puppy for a very long time, and even a blind man could see this day coming!
    Firing Schaap is NOT the end. FBC members will NOT be given the choice of a pastoral candidate unless he maintains the hero-worship of Jack Hyles that started this mess. And the beat goes on…
    I highly recommend the free ebook “The Two Jacks” available in the ebooks section of http://www.wayoflife.org. THIS is what REAL “fundies” have been warning about all along.
    FBC members, run fast, run far, and don’t look back! Ask the Lord to lead you to a spiritually healthy church, so you will have the strength to pray for those who choose to stay behind.
    And the children! In God’s name, pray for the children of FBC!!! ๐Ÿ˜ฅ

  49. A comment on The Wartburg watch referenced this post…can’t watch the vid since I’m at work and also don’t have enough time to read all the comments. Will do later today though. I’ve heard of this book before; GAG! ๐Ÿ˜ฏ

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